


Close Away

by Julibun



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-15
Updated: 2018-12-19
Packaged: 2019-09-19 12:20:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 43,519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17001555
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Julibun/pseuds/Julibun
Summary: Nothing will succeed getting between the two of them. They are together through thick and thin. But that thin is about to crumble when distance suddenly pulls them in two different directions.Chanyeol and Kyungsoo's eight year relationship has been filled with nothing but health and love. This couldn't possibly break them, right?- Contains sexual scenes, and a tiny bit of alcohol.Let me know what you think! ♡





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The idea sparked at the moment I heard the entirety of EXO's Don't Mess Up My Tempo.  
> THANK YOU Frey for the encouragements and inspiration help!!! I love you!!!  
> This is the first story I wrote with actual instructions. Well, only one instruction, I hope you guys will follow it when it comes, and enjoy it haha.
> 
> A chapter will be posted every day until the end of the story!

 

 

  
Chanyeol's knees nearly went numb when he finally finished loading all the used clothes into the washing machine. He sighed with honest relief when the laundry basket was empty, and finally stood up, allowing his legs to stretch back to their original posture with the basket in his arms.

This counts as a large load, right? Chanyeol wondered to himself regarding the amount of clothes inside. He placed the laundry basket aside in its usual spot, then kneeled down one last time in order to pour the right measured amount of detergent into the machine. While rising back up he shut the machine's front see-through circular door with his knee, then secured the opening has been properly shut. He wouldn't want it to leak.

A few more beeping clicks were needed, and once the timer has been set, Chanyeol nodded to himself, feeling accomplished when he heard the noise of water pouring into the machine as it begins operating. Good.

Even though today wasn't his turn to do laundry, when he received Kyungsoo's message about being held back at work for several more hours, he knew there's no need to hold onto the priniciple of the chore's distribution between them. By now he knows that when his boyfriend remains stuck at work for even longer than it already requires him, he'd be stressing out about these little things too much to receive the proper rest he needs after such a long day.

Chanyeol would much rather spend this extra small effort for the sake of securing his loved one's general condition and well being. Not that putting the washing machine in its cycle is that hard of a manual work, but he knows he'd prefer his boy to spend that time with him instead.

Next, the kitchen and all it entails.

When he was younger, Chanyeol would shy away from the concept of cooking. His mother and older sister spoiled him way too much for him to have the desire to learn. It wasn't until he met Kyungsoo in highschool that he started getting interested in the process behind the food he eats.

Now, while easily chopping, cutting, slicing, frying, stirring, seasoning, Chanyeol is confident in his skill.

The memories coming along with cooking don't come every time he cooks, but when they do, it's hard for him to hide the smile rising across his lips.

How fascinated he was when Kyungsoo invited him over for the first time and cooked dinner with his mother. For Chanyeol it was a whole new experience. And with the years passing, the two have grown into responsible capable adults who love each other, and know how to fill each other's stomachs with meals that'd bring joy to their tastebuds.

Overall, Chanyeol knows Kyungsoo's on a whole other level with his cooking skills. But when he decides a meal will be dedicated to his boyfriend, Chanyeol's unstoppable.

With the memories, scents and sights filling up his mind, minutes numbered up and rounded to more than an hour, and it was almost like fate had chosen for them to be in sync this late evening. Because right as Chanyeol turned off the oven, their apartment's door had been unlocked and Kyungsoo made his way inside.

Quiet steps tapped on the floor, slowly becoming louder.

"Whoa... Smells good... I'm starving..." Kyungsoo peeked into the kitchen. Round glasses framing his perfectly shaped face.

"I hope you didn't wait for long. I'll set the washing machine and then we could eat toge---"

"No need. I got it." Chanyeol smiled, turning sideways and leaning his hip against the kitchen's counter.

Kyungsoo stood in his spot for a moment before a wave of ease and joy could be easily seen washing over him. His eyebrows unclenched, his eyes loosened into a soft gaze, and his shoulders finally fell back down to their relaxed position.

With a small smile springing up his plump, pink lips, he approached Chanyeol. Entering right into his personal space with no hesitation. Clearly, Chanyeol already knew what's coming. His favourite flavour.

"Thank you... Let's eat." Kyungsoo's voice lowered into relaxation with ease, but his body rose up as he wrapped his arms around Chanyeol's shoulders. The sound of their clothes' fabrics grazing against one another, combined with his body warmth, with his scent... Ahh. Chanyeol missed him since the morning. Is it cheesy of him to admit? Needy? Doesn't matter. He knew Kyungsoo felt the same.

"Mmh." Chanyeol hummed in approval, sliding both his arms over Kyungsoo's waist and stroking his sides up and down with his palms. To make it easier for his boy to reach, Chanyeol also lowered his head down a little. Just enough for their lips to meet. Just enough for their soft kiss to count.

Kyungsoo must have hurried back home, because his lips were a little dry. They only get dry when Kyungsoo's in motion and breathes mostly from his nose, which causes him to forget to maintain the moisture on his lips. But no fear, Chanyeol is here.  
By the end of their slowly parting kiss, Chanyeol slipped his tongue and gave Kyungsoo's upper lip a little lick. They opened their eyes to look at one another just in time for Kyungsoo to see Chanyeol smiling calmly after the wet little gift.

They exchanged one last little peck before slowly untangling from each other's hold, then as planned, feasted together. Chanyeol enjoyed watching Kyungsoo eat his food as much as he enjoyed eating Kyungsoo's cooked food. Alright, yeah, maybe it's because Kyungsoo kept praising his dishes, and Chanyeol felt his ego grow along with his expanding heart, but he shouldn't ignore the fact that his boyfriend is simply the most adorable human on earth. The way he fills his cheeks with each bite, the way he chews so eagerly, the way his eyes are scanning each piece of the meal with curiousity and anticipation, dissecting the ingredients with his vision.

Chanyeol wasn't even that hungry. He had a pretty heavy lunch after his gym session this morning. But the food did turn out good, and the feelings of warmth, reassurance, and closeness when the both of them eat together are worth the extra bites. He's a big man. There's nothing wrong with a little more fuel.

"You've got the night shift tomorrow, right?" Kyungsoo asked while bringing all of the used dishes to the kitchen's sink from their little dining table. Chanyeol would have approached and offered to help, but he knew Kyungsoo wouldn't allow him to take over the only task he can complete on his own in regards to this dinner.

"Yeah. Oh, I met Junmyeon in the gym this morning." Chanyeol confirmed, and spoke, raising his eyes from his cellphone's screen only to be met with Kyungsoo's back facing him. Mmmh, these jeans look good on him. The tightness around the ass and thighs is just right.

"Nice. How's their new place? Did they settle in yet?" Kyungsoo responded, arms, shoulders, and shoulder blades slightly moving underneath his shirt with the motions of his pot washing. He looked tired, but healthy, and well fed.

Chanyeol allowed his elbow to rest on the table in order to hold his head, crossing his legs one on top of the other. He could look at Kyungsoo for hours without being bored even for a second.

"Still didn't get the green light to enter because the pipings haven't been examined by the company. Must be annoying to live surrounded by packed boxes for so long..." He sighed through his puckered lips. Kyungsoo then finally turned off the water faucet, and grabbed the towel to wipe his hands dry.

"I'm so glad everything's fine here... But I probably shouldn't say that out loud or it'd be jinxed."

Kyungsoo began, then sighed lightly. Chanyeol exhaled half a chuckle in agreement, and watched how Kyungsoo came to stand beside him. Gentle palm rested on his head and began trailing fingertips over his scalp. Oh, Chanyeol felt like he was melting. He loves it when Kyungsoo does that. It's heavenly.

"I'mma shower." He said softly, then leaned down and placed a long smooch on Chanyeol's head. His warmth passed down in waves through Chanyeol's body, and still lingered even after Chanyeol saw him leave the living room into the hallway.

 

 

Will he be getting sleepy Kyungsoo tonight? That'd be quite a treat. Although Chanyeol hasn't done anything tremendously significant today, he'd never refuse himself the joy of having Kyungsoo's drowsy self snuggle against him in bed. Or Kyungsoo's happy self. Or sad, or angry, or energetic. Chanyeol loves all of Kyungsoo's selves. And the best part about it, is that he knows all of these sides of his boyfriend will snuggle against him in bed no matter the situation.

Chanyeol, already clean from an earlier shower, finished the last few household chores left before sleep, and settled into the bed shortly after. Shirtlessly he leaned against the back of their bed and opened up one of the game apps on his phone. The quiet sound of Kyungsoo's muffled shower in the back was reassuring. He sunk into the game quickly, trying to advance his stats in order to surpass his friends' high scores on the board. As always, he got fairly immersed in the spirit of competetivity.

He didn't even notice when Kyungsoo finished showering, so it caught him by surprise to find his boyfriend slowly crawling on the bed from the front and lying himself on top of his body. Chanyeol's hands jerked a little when Kyungsoo's head fell gently against his bare chest, the game didn't seem to matter that much anymore at all.

"Oh... You're so cute." Chanyeol smiled down at the yawn Kyungsoo exhaled against his skin. His phone holding hand fell aside, uninterested, while his free hand slowly slid its way down his boyfriend's back, further and further down.

"Mmmh... I missed you." Kyungsoo hummed while planting soft kisses on his chest.

Oh... Oh god. Not only is he getting sleepy Kyungsoo, he's getting affectionate sleepy Kyungsoo? Chanyeol felt like the winner of a grand lottery jackpot. His entire body perked with a layer of desire. The phone long abandoned on the bed side shelf, with both hands now focusing on playfully cupping and massaging Kyungsoo's ass cheeks under the loose rubber line of his briefs.

"And I missed you too." Kyungsoo spoke again, this time, head turned downwards at the only other direction he would be interested in looking at. Chanyeol's growing buldge under the low hanging sweatpants. Chanyeol was slightly surprised, but let out a loud snicker, feeling the atmosphere steaming up when Kyungsoo's palm now began stroking the tent that rose under the fabric.

"Have you been holding back?" Chanyeol asked in a calm voice, grabbing tighter onto his boyfriend's perfect perked round ass and pulling him closer against his body. Their crotches rubbing together with the motion. Now with Kyungsoo practically sitting in his lap, he could finally reach his head in and lay soft kisses all over the fresh scented skin of Kyungsoo's neck and collar bones.

Kyungsoo's warm exhales of satisfaction from Chanyeol's given attention sounded so natural, like a heartbeat, like Chanyeol's second nature.

"Yeah... I had to focus on my last report. Since it's done... Tomorrow will be easy peasy." He answered before lowering his face and planting his lips against Chanyeol's. The two started kissing slowly. The sweet aftertaste of the rice from dinner produced more saliva than they were prepared for, and the kiss had shifted into a slobbery sticky heated mess while Chanyeol's fingers began teasing Kyungsoo's rim.

"Mmh... I really missed this." Chanyeol felt Kyungsoo's lips breathing out against his own before he parted their kiss and placed both hands on both their crotches. After a small adjustment of his own briefs' removal, Chanyeol watched his boyfriend lick his lips while pulling off Chanyeol's own clothing pieces. Damn... When Kyungsoo's into it Chanyeol doesn't stand a chance. Seeing that lustful expression of his was like an immediate green light sign for Chanyeol's body to pace up and prepare for the unison.

"I can see that baby. You're so hot." Chanyeol hummed lowly, his eyes narrowing at the sight of Kyungsoo's bare body grinding against his own. There wasn't even a need for him to hesitate as he sent both his hands at the exposed skin in front of him. Chanyeol utilized his long fingers for the sake of physically scanning every skin patch on Kyungsoo's body. Admiring every mole, every stretch mark, every blemish and bump and curve.

He almost felt high from seeing the way Kyungsoo's cheeks flushed, a spark of joyous shyness appeared in his eyes, which was the complete opposite expression to what Chanyeol would have thought Kyungsoo would be doing while dribbling his saliva over his own three fingers and shoving them up his own ass right after.

"Oh my god... Baby. Fucking sexy..." Chanyeol gulped at the sight of Kyungsoo tilting his head sideways and exhaling some hot air while opening himself up so eagerly. It's not a rare occassion for Kyungsoo to be this wanting, but Chanyeol's brain is wired to fulfill whatever it is Kyungsoo would be wanting. His body's matching right at the edges, right as the other half of Kyungsoo's own puzzle piece.

At times like these Chanyeol is reminded just how strong the sensation that they were meant for this, for each other, is between them.

"Have YOU been holding back, too?" Kyungsoo awakened him from his hungry-like immersed gaze he had on the display of Kyungsoo's actions. A quick glance down at his own dick caged between Kyungsoo's thighs and balls was enough for Chanyeol to remember just why the hold back is always, Always, worth it.

He almost felt shy about just how hard he became already, only from these simple actions.

"Hey, don't tease me, you know I save it for the best." Chanyeol pouted before cupping Kyungsoo's cheeks and pulling himself up to exchange a few airy kisses.

"Shh." Kyungsoo shushed him, placing his free hand on Chanyeol's chest and pushing him back down against the back of the bed and pillows. It caught him quite surprised, but he comfortably adjusted himself in his new position. Curiously admiring the way Kyungsoo finally brought his busy hand out of his ass. He crawled backwards and sat himself on top of Chanyeol's shins, while leaning down and grasping a firm hold of Chanyeol's dick.

"Holy shit... Baby, did I win the lottery?" Chanyeol teased, only to have his lips shut with a single seductive glance coming from Kyungsoo, who by now began licking slowly up the length of Chanyeol's pole and wrapping his mouth around the head.

A sharp zap of pleasure ran through Chanyeol's entire body like lightning when Kyungsoo's tongue began working its magic and twirling over the head. Combined with the hard eager jerking of both his palms up and down against the throbs. Chanyeol huffed out hotly.

"I love you---... Fuck... Look at those pretty lips." Left his mouth as he ran his hand over Kyungsoo's hair, removing a few strands from his forehead. It quickly got wet and sticky when his boyfriend began bobbing his head up and down, allowing the mixture of his saliva and Chanyeol's precum to drip down and lubricate it to the very base.

"So good--- God---" Kyungsoo rubbed, grabbed, squeezed, sucked, licked and drooled over his dick like it's a popcicle he found after starving and drying for days in the desert.

"O-Ohh--- Baby, ready, ready." Chanyeol had to announce while gently placing his hand under Kyungsoo's jaw in order to pull him off, feeling his stomach tightening with the pleasure. The muscles on his abdomen began flexing involuntarily with the pulses of arousal that usually mean Chanyeol's nearing his limit.

He felt relieved with how in sync the two of them truly were when it came to listening to the energy and sensations about each other's bodies.  
"Hah... To think we just had dinner..." Chanyeol joked about just how hungry Kyungsoo looked while eating his dick moments ago.  
As different as they are, they've grown into one another, and now complement the exact missing pieces of their beings. Together, they're balance, and growth, and hope.

Together, they're also damn fucking sexy. At least Kyungsoo was, when he pulled his mouth off of Chanyeol's length, breathing hotly on it and allowing strings of sticky liquids to remain connected to it from the corners of his lips.  
"This is just the night snack." He said, eyes locking with Chanyeol's once again and sending a rush of excitement over him.

Chanyeol wanted to eat him out. He wanted to mess him up, to show him just how much he truly missed him, how badly he craved the only meal he hungered for, that food cannot satisfy.

Without even turning to look away from Kyungsoo's tongue clearing the sticky strings away from his lips, he pulled a condom out of the lower drawer in the bedside shelf and handed it to Kyungsoo. Who easily ripped the wrapper open and stroked it skillfully over his toy. Or at least to Chanyeol, when Kyungsoo's this eager, it looked like he treated his dick like a precious toy.

"I can't wait." Kyungsoo huffed with a stuffed mouth. He slid two fingers into his mouth again and gathered the remains of the mixture onto them, then brought the liquids back to his hole once more.  
"Should I---"  
"Shush." His boyfriend shut him up once more while going up to stand on his knees and coming closer, positioning himself properly while still holding onto Chanyeol's dick for good measure. Holy... What's gotten into him? Chanyeol started feeling another strong wave of shyness slowly surfacing to his consciousness from seeing Kyungsoo's fiery lust in such bold display.

This time, Chanyeol listened. Both by wish, but also by the fact that Kyungsoo's piercing stare at him was almost paralyzing. Like a flame, strong, hot, overwhelming. Chanyeol was burning.

He was finally feeling shy. He gulped when speeding his eyes up and down between Kyungsoo's facial expression, and the arousing visual of the penetration, as Kyungsoo lowered his hips over his dick, guiding him inside with the tips of his fingers.  
"Oooh... Mmh." Kyungsoo let a few more sounds of adjustments leave his lips, sinking deeper and deeper down, swallowing more and more of Chanyeol into himself.

"So hot--- Fuck---" Chanyeol felt his muscles tensing with arousal from the tightness of Kyungsoo's walls sucking him inside. He really worked hard on the lubrication, it seemed. Because other than the usual wince of realization that Chanyeol's dick keeps going further than Kyungsoo thought he could contain, there was no friction or resistence.

It went in, and out, and in, and out, and in again. And it was heaven.

Chanyeol wanted to hold Kyungsoo so bad. Wrap around him and snack on his soft skin for as long as this will last. But when he began raising himself up to sit and grab his boyfriend's waist, two hands were pressed against his chest again, pushing him down on the mattress.

"Stop... I want to go l-like this..." Kyungsoo hummed, stuttering a little when he downed himself all the way again. Chanyeol was speechless for a few moments, staring at Kyungsoo's body curving, arching, raising and falling on top of him. He was fairly quiet while the pace remained decently slow. It felt so good... Chanyeol had to grab onto the sheets to prevent his hands from reaching out to his boy.

Once Kyungsoo's insides were soothed to the new yet familiar intrusion, he started breathing a little heavier, blushing a little deeper, and staring way sharper into Chanyeol's eyes. Chanyeol was in a daze as Kyungsoo began riding him. He's well straddled for Kyungsoo to mount. With soft thighs at each side of his hips.

His heart was beating as fast as his breath was being exhaled loudly out of his mouth. Seeing the way Kyungsoo's face kept shifting from pressure to pleasure with each movement of his hips was a lot. Seeing the way his lips kept opening and quivering between the gentle yet soulful moans, his flushed face and eyes that were shining with lust... Chanyeol was powerless. His body was set aflame.

If he ever dies, he hoped he will die while being ridden by Kyungsoo like this. It was too much for his unsuspecting heart to take. He can't take no more of Kyungsoo's impossibly sexy gazes and moans.  
"Y-You're too much--- God---" With shyness creeping to the outer layer of his behaviour, Chanyeol raised his hands and covered his face. Leaving a gap between two fingers in order to still have the view he's trying to hide from.  
"Your loss... Ahh--- I love this... So big for me babe--- Oooh, yes get in--!" Kyungsoo kept going, speeding up, going down deeper. The sounds of their skins slapping started getting louder together with both their sounds of exhaled pleasure.

"So good baby, beautiful---..." Chanyeol moaned out to Kyungsoo's satisfaction, deciding he wouldn't keep his hands away after all. He physically couldn't hold back. Now with rising levels of arousal and advancement towards the edge. His fingers began sliding to the sides of Kyungsoo's legs, until both of his entire palms grabbed tightly at the bottom of his thighs, right under the bouncing perfect squishy ass.

"Chanyeolie--- Owah--..." Kyungsoo's hands slid down over Chanyeol's own body, fingers stroking over his hard muscles, shaping curves and creaks from under his skin. That's it, Chanyeol's had it.

His grip on his boyfriend's thighs turned to a tight hold over his hips, and he bit his lower lip while focusing his eyes on the eyes staring back down at him with arousal. After hot air released like steam out of his nose, he began raising his own hips up and down into Kyungsoo. Slapping against his lowering ass and reaching new depths inside him.

Kyungsoo's back arched inwards as a loud moan flew right from the core of his body.  
"O-Oh--- Yes--! Yes, oh--- Good! Fuck me---" He pleaded wetly as Chanyeol continued drilling into him, pushing against natural gravity and causing his whole body to shake and tremble. He's so close, Kyungsoo was his home, his comfort, his relief.

A short glance away from Kyungsoo's melting face downwards between his thighs revealed that indeed, Chanyeol's extra movement, although tiring, was definitely working well.  
"Good Chanyeolie, yes! I--- Ahh, I like this, more!" While Kyungsoo's dick formed harder and harder as it fell back on Chanyeol's stomach with each thrust up, Chanyeol could clearly feel the way his walls were tightening around him, pulling him in further. Pulling him closer to his sweet release.

"Baby--- I'm almost--- Gaah---" Chanyeol huffed, moaning deeply out into the air.  
"Go. Go! Come for me, you're so good---" Kyungsoo moaned back just as desperately before suddenly dropping his upper body down. Both his hands were placed on Chanyeol's jaw as he pulled him into a heated kiss. Both of them were huffing into it, losing their breath in an attempt to fill each other's mouths.

Chanyeol's eyebrows furrowed once a strong sting of the ultimate form of pleasure was sent through him from the depths of Kyungsoo's body.  
"Kyungsoo--- Oh-- Ohh, baby, I love you---" He parted the kiss urgently and narrowed his eyes while thrusting into Kyungsoo slowly, deeper than ever, and released everything he's been holding back into the condom.

He would have shut his eyes, but he didn't want to miss the way Kyungsoo's face always turns all shy and embarrassed when Chanyeol's at his peak.

The orgasm was strong and long enough for him to be able to receive a few more heated airy kisses from Kyungsoo through it, and he felt how the muscles all over his body were finally loosening back from the constant flex position they were at due to the excitement.  
"Fuck---..." He was breathing heavily. "You're heaven." Chanyeol ran his hands from under Kyungsoo's thighs, allowing his fingers to stroke them from the inside.

However, it looked like Kyungsoo was planning something more.  
"Me too, now..." He huffed, allowing his own body to ease down from the high that Chanyeol's orgasm put him in.

Once that was done, he rose up, releasing Chanyeol's dick from within him and easily getting rid of the condom. Then he stood on his knees once again, and stepped forward, more and more. He had to raise one leg at a time in order to wrap his knees on the sides of Chanyeol's head.

"Oh, fucking sexy. Let me eat you." Chanyeol hummed, licking over his own lips before pulling Kyungsoo's hardened dick into his mouth. With his boyfriend's sweet thighs on each side of his head, he shut his eyes, enjoying the way Kyungsoo began trembling lightly while trying to hold back from fucking into Chanyeol's mouth.

He used the opportunity of this position to easily reach Kyungsoo's ass and massage it. Gently swiping his fingers over his loose wet rim, but also stroking a little roughly above his tail bone to ease the pressure his dick had caused.

He kept sucking, licking, bobbing his head up and down, eating up Kyungsoo's dick like it was dinner's dessert. He opened his eyes lightly when he felt his boy's precum leaking to the back of his throat.  
"Feels good... Chanyeolie, good---" Kyungsoo was holding tightly onto the back of the bed, eyes shut, while breathing and moaning hotly with that expression of his that draws his eyebrows outwards in plead.

An impish thought floated around in Chanyeol's head, until he took it and chose to act. He slid both his index finger and middle finger right into Kyungsoo's hole once more and pressed deep against the heated walls, right onto the prostate, while at the same time pushing his head foreward and containing Kyungsoo's near whole length in his mouth.

His boyfriend's body shook sharply as he gasped in shock.  
"Chanyeo---" He shuddered strongly, grunting and huffing as he spilled out into Chanyeol's mouth. For as long as it took, Chanyeol kept pressing his fingers inside, and sucking on whatever was released with thirst.

The two of them finally detached from one another after a short moment of stabilizing their breaths back. Kyungsoo pulled back and sat on Chanyeol's abdomen, breathing warmly and staring down at him with an exhausted satisfied smile.

"You did so well... Baby boy." He said with his calm airy tone, then leaned down and pecked Chanyeol's lips slowly. Chanyeol's whole body tingled sweetly with renewed shyness at the praise and term of endearment.

"I love you."  
"Mmh, I love you." Kyungsoo pecked his lips once more. The two of them smiling against each other's mouths. Warmth, relief, joy... All of these, and more, were felt in the atmosphere surrounding them.  
"Let's wash up." Chanyeol suggested, knowing Kyungsoo will agree, as he wrapped both arms around his body and sat up. Easily leaving the bed while holding his boyfriend up in the air with barely any effort. Kyungsoo didn't even show signs of wanting to battle that position. On the contrary, he looked pretty pleased to have a boyfriend that can easily hold him in the air like that.

The two showered together neatly, then returned to bed for the sake of an affectionate snuggle. Chanyeol's head was rested against Kyungsoo's chest, as the other was stroking the back of his head with his fingers. Both of Chanyeol's arms were hugging around Kyungsoo's lower body like a pillow.

Drifting into sleep like that, another regular day had passed.

 

 

Chanyeol and Kyungsoo have been together for longer than Chanyeol can recall being without Kyungsoo around. They've met in highschool, and are now well into their eight year romantic relationship anniversary. They've been through thick and thin together, and are fully adjusted to understanding each other's words, non-words, and intentions without any stress or doubts.

They talk about anything, they vent to one another freely, they can crack one another up to the ground with ugly laughter when they're feeling playful. They've learned each other's favourite flavours, and most hated pet peeves. From very early on they've realized that the two of them are simply surfing on the same wave. Nothing could truly separate their hearts. Even when larger issues came around the corner, they never once doubted the fact that behind the discomfort and anger there's unconditional love and acceptance.

Surprisingly, it took Chanyeol's family a little bit longer to fully adjust to their sort of relationship, five years ago when they finally came out to both their families after coming to the decision of living together.

Kyungsoo's family, although tightly religious, had immediately offered their support and welcomed Chanyeol into their bloodlines, even more than the family status he already held before. While Chanyeol's family, who were all over the top with their admiration towards Kyungsoo, almost attempted to replace Chanyeol with Kyungsoo as a part of their family instead. But when they realized it'd yield the same result they've granted their blessings.

Which at this era, years later, are exchanged by the monthly visit of Chanyeol's mother and deliverance of delicious food right off her restaurant's menu.

Today, Chanyeol came a little late from work himself. So barely half an hour after he finally took his shoes off, the door had been opened again and Kyungsoo stepped inside. Chanyeol could only hear it, as he was busy plating yesterday's leftovers in order to heat it up for them both.

It was... Oddly quiet. He certainly heard Kyungsoo enter. He heard him take his shoes off, and heard his feet tapping against the floor tiles through their apartment. Chanyeol nearly jumped when he turned to place a plate in the microwave and noticed Kyungsoo already sitting down at the table. Holding his hands together on the placemat and staring at his own fingers with an expression he couldn't clearly read.

"Hey baby, rough day at work?" He questioned, turning over and leaning against the counter with the microwave whirring beside him. Kyungsoo didn't seem to respond to the question at all. It flew over his head unheard.

"Kyungsoo? What's up?" Chanyeol's eyebrows rose slightly in surprise. Yeah, there are times where Kyungsoo doesn't necessarily pay his full attention to Chanyeol's words. Although it can make him feel slightly unwelcome, he by now had learned that it usually derives from Kyungsoo's own thoughts being way louder in his mind.

He looked so serious, closed off, cold and even slightly sad, when Chanyeol finally sat down to the table in front of him and placed the plates down. Chanyeol felt his heart beating irregularly because of his boyfriend's intense negative aura spreading everywhere. Though it seemed that the smell of food awakened him a little, and he began slowly pulling the food up into his mouth unwillingly.

"Baby... What is it?" Chanyeol tried once more, maybe now that his body's doing some sort of action his mind will be free enough to provide a response. It made him feel unsettled to see Kyungsoo this shut off. It rarely happens.

He didn't know what to expect, but there was still no response. Kyungsoo hasn't even made eye contact with him yet. Whatever it is, must be pretty serious to push Kyungsoo this much off the rail. Normally he doesn't fall under pressure this intensely, and Chanyeol's the one getting, admittedly, annoyingly emotional over, sometimes, trivial things.

They ate in silence, which was pretty shitty, but Chanyeol decided he wouldn't get pulled into the looming negativity, and instead did his very best to focus on his phone between the lazy bites. Chatting with Junmyeon and Jongin about the next time they'll be able to arrange a group workout at the gym. An event that happened early in the morning that Chanyeol wanted to share with Kyungsoo, but it simply wasn't the right time.

Even later in bed, Kyungsoo hasn't said a word, and hasn't looked even once into Chanyeol's eyes. He was slightly worried it might after all be something he had done, but when they lied down to sleep in the quiet darkness, Kyungsoo huddled against his back and wrapped an arm over his waist lightly.  
That gesture, although minor, was enough for Chanyeol to be reassured of the fact that whatever issue is boiling in Kyungsoo's mind has nothing to do with anything Chanyeol related.

He could have easily handled a day like this, there were way worse in their history, but it didn't last a day. It continued to the next, and even one after. At which point Chanyeol knew that Kyungsoo's contemplating something incredibly serious that conflicts against something he holds close to his core.

"Kyungsoo, this has to stop. Come on baby. Why are you sulking like this?" Chanyeol broke his silence on the morning of his boyfriend's third negative aura days. The two of them were just finishing brushing their teeth in front of the mirror. Kyungsoo seemed to have been caught off guard by Chanyeol's plead. He locked his eyes with Chanyeol's through the mirror before quickly averting them away.

"Did something happen at work? Your last project? Your boss? Are you not feeling well---" Chanyeol continued asking, trying to wrap his arms around his boyfriend's body to hug him, but Kyungsoo kept walking off to avoid being touched at all.

"Did I do anything? Did Baekhyun piss you off again? Have you been robbed? Did---" Chanyeol's large steps easily caught up to Kyungsoo's smaller ones across the bedroom, and he gently slid his arms to the sides of Kyungsoo's shirtless body from behind in an attempt to pull him into a hug.

"No! Shut up!! Stop bothering me about it." Kyungsoo finally spoke. More like, snapped. He shoved Chanyeol's arms away from his body and grabbed the first shirt his arm reached to touch inside the closet. With a huff he pulled it over his head, leaving Chanyeol stunned behind him for a few moments.

"Bab---"  
"Just--- I can't---... I hate this. So just leave me alone already." Kyungsoo's voice was harsh and sharp, yet contained so much sadness and pain, true struggle that'd only be noticed by those like Chanyeol who have seen him dealing with dire situations before.

Chanyeol couldn't help but feel quite hurt from the unexpected and violent refusal of his attempt at giving affection. But seeing just how caught up in the struggle Kyungsoo sounded, kind of eased down his own selfish little fend.

Sometimes a compromise is to take place. And in this situation, which was fairly unexpected and uncommon, Chanyeol knew he couldn't pick a side against Kyungsoo. His boyfriend's being burdened by something greater than Chanyeol would be able to guess from the top of his head, so he better sit his ass down from his own lumps of emotions and become a strong substance for Kyungsoo to lean against and rely on.

"... Love you. See you later." Chanyeol finally exhaled gently. He noticed Kyungsoo's body freezing right by their bedroom's door for a second, like he wanted to turn around and reply like he always does, but instead his fist clenched before he shut the door behind him.

It's alright. It's fine. Chanyeol shouldn't begin panicking about this. He held perfectly fine until now, and he trusts Kyungsoo. When something bothers them about one another they are never afraid to confront each other about it. They always communicate when things they're doing are right or wrong.

Something clearly is wrong, but he'll have to believe in Kyungsoo to come to a point where he could fully explain what's weighing his heart on his own. Pushing and pestering him would only result in further discomfort and anger shot at both sides.

Chanyeol sighed deeply and allowed his body to fall back onto the bed with a thud of escaping air. He's gotta hold strong for his boy. As hard as it is, he has to push through for this. He's already seen Kyungsoo in distress about outer situations before, but this time was different. This time, although he knew it wasn't caused by him, it felt more personal. Like somehow he's still connected.

He'd run his mind down to filth if he kept trying to imagine what could possibly be sending Kyungsoo to this extreme. He thought it could be his boss possibly reacting wrongly to finding they're together, but Kyungsoo's boss literally invited the two of them to a double date dinner before. He clearly knows. Another option would be that Kyungsoo somehow messed up and got in trouble, and now feels guilty about it? But that's unlikely... Kyungsoo works so meticulously, he wouldn't allow mistakes to happen. Maybe he got caught in some office drama that he doesn't know how to solve? Also unlikely... Kyungsoo's not the type to fall into drama, or be affected by what other people have to say. Not after so many years.

But the hurt look on Kyungsoo's face... Ugh. Chanyeol felt like he wanted to beat whoever caused his baby this pain up. And if it somehow turns out to be him, he'd beat himself up too.

 

 

"I dont know... Kyungsoo's going through something shitty, and I feel so damn useless... He just doesn't say anything all day but then he still snuggles up to me in bed to sleep." Chanyeol sighed heavily, allowing his head to fall onto the table in front of him. The muffled talking of other coffee store customers around, along with the quiet jazz music coming from the speakers, were actually soothing for his confusion.

The smell of coffee and baked goods reminded him of the evenings at home where Kyungsoo has had a free day from work, and would normally spend some extra time and effort to treat the both of them to some baked masterpiece of a doughy food.

"Definitely sounds work related to me." Jongdae replied, sipping on his mug slowly before humming out with satisfaction.

Chanyeol raised his face from the table and gave Jongdae a look of hope from below.  
"You think? I mean, I think so too... But..." He rose up fully and leaned backwards against the back of the chair. Meeting up for coffee usually includes Baekhyun as well. The three same aged buddies in their group of friends have always been quite close to one another. But this time Baekhyun's out for a visit in China.

"You know your boy, he'll tell you eventually. He gets quite shaken when things are too serious and difficult for him to think of. Just like in highschool." Jongdae attempted to reassure him, even stretched out his arm to pet Chanyeol's head gently. Chanyeol squeezed his own lips into a sad expression for a moment before sipping on his own coffee.

"Oh my god Minseokie is the best." He exclaimed at the moment he realized his coffee had an extra pump of sugar syrup in it. Jongdae must have told him Chanyeol was feeling down before they've arrived. Being the owner and the main barista of his own cafe place gives him the freedom to do as he'd like. And this time, Minseok used that power to cheer Chanyeol up in his own way.

Chanyeol turned his head straight to his friend at the bar, noticing him grinning in return. Ah... Chanyeol wanted to cry. Minseokie is such a wonderful friend, and Jongdae's so helpful and kind. He would have truly cried after the sharp affection rejection situation that happened this morning if it wasn't for them.

"Anyway, I know you've been patient. Just give him a little more time." Jongdae concluded confidently.  
"I fully understand you on that one. When Minseokie's stressed about something he usually doesn't say a word until he finishes making our place squeeky clean. That's his therapy in a way." He explained, glancing aside at Minseok working at the counter on another order. Chanyeol understood it well.

He thanked Minseok sincerely at the counter for the extra friendly touch in his coffee, then greeted Jongdae goodbye with a silent nod of mutual understanding. He felt a little better, and definitely way more confident with himself about the situation with Kyungsoo.

In the evening, again, Chanyeol was the one cooking them both dinner. He did it gladly, really. After meeting with Jongdae he went on a grocery replenishing spree, and it's always fun to cook with fresh new ingredients. Even through the loud sizzling of different items on oiled pans, he could still easily recognize the sound of Kyungsoo's key unlocking the door and entering.

What he wasn't expecting though, were Kyungsoo's arms slowly wrapping around his waist from behind. He felt the weight of his boyfriend's head rest against his back, and the little tight squeeze his stomach received once both arms were locked in place. Chanyeol's heart was pumping in his chest with warmth. He can barely ever remain calm when Kyungsoo's the one suddenly giving him these affectionate displays without a warning.

"Hey baby. Food's almost done."  
"Mmh..." Kyungsoo mumbled into Chanyeol's back, and kept hanging onto him like a koala for the last few minutes it took to finish their meal.

He looked even more sad today when they were eating in silence. But this time Chanyeol knew he will hear what he was wondering about. Even if they have to sit quietly and stare at each other for some time, that's fine, because Kyungsoo just needs to gather up enough courage before finally pouring out what's been clogging his heart. Chanyeol's got the time, and from the way Kyungsoo's staring down at the table sincerely, he knows he has the means to do so.

"Chanyeolie baby, I'm..." Kyungsoo finally bagan. "I'm sorry for being a jerk... There's just something I need to tell you." He sighed lightly, and finally looked up at Chanyeol's face. His eyes looked tired, and his eyebrows were drawn back with worry and sadness.

"Last week I finished my previous project and turned it in... Remember?" Chanyeol nodded.  
"It was really good. It was so great, that my boss showed it to his own upper heads." Oh! That's great! Chanyeol felt a strong sense of pride bubbling up in his stomach. A small smile spread across his face, that is certainly a reason for celebration. He wanted to congratulate him out loud. But Kyungsoo's face didn't seem to be not in the slight bright with joy from the achievement.

"But... Because it was so successful they... They want to send me away to supervise on another project." His voice sounded nothing but glad for this opportunity. Chanyeol was surprised. Such a chance is something rare, he understood right away that this option will be Kyungsoo's test on his way to receiving a promotion. Which is something he was striving for ever since he began his job in the company.

"This is amazing baby! I'm so proud of you! You've worked so hard all these years... You finally get this opportunity you deserve so much." Chanyeol replied cheerfully. "Being sent away for a little isn't that bad! Plus I wouldn't mind having the house to myself for a bit." He laughed jokingly and gently grabbed onto Kyungsoo's hands over the table and held them tightly within his own respectively larger palms. It was an obvious tease of the moment in an attempt to cheer Kyungsoo up, but the expression on his face looked slightly shocked with hurt.

"I was just kidding. Of course I wouldn't want you away---" Chanyeol quickly began covering up for his own rising stake of possible mistake of reading the situation, but before he could begin actually panicking, Kyungsoo's hands tightened ever so lightly in his grip.  
"Two months."

Silence, Chanyeol's eyes widened in surprise at Kyungsoo's cold exhale.

"They want me to stay there for two months." His voice sounded emotionless and empty. Chanyeol understood now. He fully understood why Kyungsoo's been behaving so strange these last few days. The realization is slowly starting to trickle into Chanyeol's mind.

"I don't know what to do. It'd be amazing for my career... But I'm scared. If they send me away once, who's to say they won't send me again...? Even if it pays really good." Chanyeol, as someone who's only gotten to hear the news now, was unable to form any actual serious thoughts about the changes such a task or new position at work will bring. But from the way Kyungsoo's speaking he can tell that this was defintiely the heavy burden looming on his heart these days. He's been thoroughly thinking about all of the consequences regarding this advancement.

Chanyeol began rubbing his thumbs over Kyungsoo's hands gently. Neither of them let go of the touch. Somehow, it felt to Chanyeol like no matter what, he must not let go of Kyungsoo. Even if it's just a little touch like holding hands.

"It will be alright. There isn't any problem with working hard and giving it your all. Plus, if you're away you wouldn't have to deal with me holding you back." Chanyeol chuckled, watching Kyungsoo's eyes shooting down.  
"You know, if you do this as well as your previous project succeeded, you could probably reach a position where you'll be able to choose other options than going away next time." He continued, mustering every fiber of his energy to try and come up with other positive outcomes that'll occur from the situation at hand.

Just from looking at Kyungsoo's expression he can see that his boyfriend must have hoped deep down that Chanyeol would get upset, and try to stop him, and act a little more seriously, maybe even a little possessively. But at the same time He knows that Kyungsoo's logical side is extremely grateful to the fact that Chanyeol's being this supportive and encouraging.

"I will be going there alone to a team of people I don't know... All the way out in China... I've only been there once, with you, when we visited Baekhyun and Yixing in Changsha." Kyungsoo raised another obstacle that stood on his mind and gave him further struggle about the subject.

"What are you afraid of? They'll love you. You're skilled and hardworking, you're funny, you're friendly and kind," Chanyeol began, stepping up from his chair and walking around the table. He stopped right beside Kyungsoo, still holding his hands, and kneeled down on the floor.  
"And you're so, impossibly adorable," He scooted closer, and kissed the back of Kyungsoo's palms while looking right into his eyes.  
"They don't stand a chance."

Kyungsoo looked at him silently for a short while, before his lips trembled lightly into a small shy smile. His eyes turned to look down at their hands held together, and it felt like a little bit of burdensome stress from explaining the situation to Chanyeol has been removed from his chest.

Chanyeol takes advantage of his score and smiles, leading both of Kyungsoo's hands to be placed over his cheeks, just so he could shut his eyes and nuzzle his own face into them. He loves his boyfriend's little hands. They get swallowed by Chanyeol's own large palms, and holding them feels like carrying precious treasures.

"A-And I'm worried because I'm going to miss you too much..." Kyungsoo's confession made Chanyeol open his eyes again and look up at his flushed boyfriend's face. O-Oh gosh. Chanyeol's insides are starting to stir up bubbles of emotions.  
"I know it's lame, because I trust you with no doubt, I'm just... I don't know how I'd do without you around for this long." Kyungsoo's voice became lower, more airy, his lips were slightly pouted and his eyes looking sideways with both embarrassment and sadness.

Such words being said by anybody's lover would put them in a craze. Chanyeol too, was no different, as he felt his heart starting to ache from just how painfully sweet, and painfully painful hearing Kyungsoo saying these words with so much concern was like.

"Oh baby." Chanyeol felt his whole chest pumping with warmth and worry. Kyungsoo is... The world. Kyungsoo is his life. The amount of love that he feels towards him is overflowing. It keeps growing and filling and spreading, spilling all over once surpassing the brim of Chanyeol's capacity.

His heart clenched at the fact that Kyungsoo's been struggling with all these fears and contradicting emotions about the situation on his own, and that he hurt so much because of it simply so he wouldn't have to cause further harm to Chanyeol by presenting him with an unfinished thinking process that might have sparked up unnecessary conflicts.

Chanyeol released the hold he had on Kyungsoo's hands, and instead wrapped both his arms over his boyfriend's small figure, pulling him to the edge of his seat so that he could fully embrace his compact size compared to Chanyeol's own.

"You're the best thing in my whole entire life. You ARE my whole entire life. I wouldn't go a day without you." He hummed deeply, strong enough for Kyungsoo to hear him clearly even if his head is almost hidden inside of Kyungsoo's gentle hold. Fingers running through his hair.  
"We'll talk every day. We'll text and call, we can even call on video, you could take me everywhere with you. We'll stay just as close even if we're apart," He continued, pulling his head back so that he could look up and see Kyungsoo's reactions. He'll get a hint if anything he's saying fits with the vibe.

"Nothing will tear us apart, you know that." He added, seeing the way Kyungsoo's eyes are dancing slightly in their sockets, shining a little more than the norm. Ah... He's so cute. He's so strong when he tries to deal with intense situations along with his own emotions. Kyungsoo's not one to fall too deeply in despair like Chanyeol when in distress, so when Chanyeol gets to see glimpses into the depth of Kyungsoo's heart, he treasures these moments.

"Yes. Thank you baby... I love you. I really appreciate this." Kyungsoo's voice was a little shaky as he spoke. Then he leaned down, curling his back low in order to press a warm kiss on Chanyeol's forehead, and then hug around him.

That night as they were in the process of falling asleep, Kyungsoo buried himself in between Chanyeol's arms. Breathing slow and easy. Chanyeol wanted to curl and squeeze Kyungsoo as tightly as a bear, but he knew he needed this sort of gentle peace.  
"I'll sleep on it, and tell you tomorrow what I'd do." Kyungsoo mumbled quietly, and exhaled all the air out of his lungs in order to fully replace his supply and relax. Chanyeol trailed long fingers over the side of his head for a little while.

It's not like Kyungsoo has much choice. Chanyeol knows that in case he decides against doing as he's told there's a high chance he'll be losing his job. Or forced to quit, or reduced in position... Too dramatic of consequences for Kyungsoo to carry and take upon himself. Chanyeol knows that his boy wouldn't turn down a challenge, especially one that'll benefit him, the both of them actually, this much. Even if it means sacrificing something in exchange.

Two months is not a simple matter. It's not like the two weeks they've spent apart before. Compared to two months, two weeks are a joke. That can't even be considered a distanced relationship at all.

Things will be real, and lonely. It'd be a job taken by the both of them.

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

 

 

 

"I'll take it. I'll do it. Just because it's scary doesn't mean I need to give up on it... Right?" Kyungsoo announced the next evening, after explaining how much his boss encouraged him into taking this task upon himself, and how beneficial it'll be for him in the future.

"My pride." Chanyeol grinned, feeling encouraged himself to give everything he's got into assisting Kyungsoo with getting through it. He pecked the top of Kyungsoo's head, then lightly cleaned a single fallen hair away from his shirt.

"You've got this." He added, stroking over Kyungsoo's cheek while looking into his eyes.  
"Yeah... Yeah. It'll be fine." Kyungsoo nodded, battling the fears within himself to grow further confidence in his decision. He wouldn't take it back, and Chanyeol knew he must now be a source of strength for his boy.

It's only two months. Sixty one days. Kyungsoo's strong enough for it, right? And Chanyeol is... Too... Right?

Quicker than Chanyeol had realized would come the time, the two of them spent a free afternoon packing Kyungsoo's luggage for the long trip. All traveling and basic survival needs fees are going under his company's expenses and not their personal pocket, so he had no issue with going over the weight limit.

Kyungsoo's going to be away exactly for the autumn season. From the middle of Septermber, until the middle of November. More than the slight sadness Chanyeol feels about the fact that Kyungsoo wouldn't be able to escort him to any halloween parties this year, he's worried about his health and well being. The weather's extremely tricky during the autumn, turning from a decent sun into freezing cloud covered skies in a matter of minutes.

Of course, Kyungsoo was aware of that too, and Chanyeol didn't need to convince him to pack an extra sweater or a jacket. Kyungsoo decided he'd purchase a large padded coat when he gets to where he's supposed to be, instead of having to carry it around with him and take that much more useful space. Both Kyungsoo and Chanyeol are quite sensitive when it comes to cold weathers, so although worried, Chanyeol knew Kyungsoo'll be keeping himself warm enough.

"Slippers? You won't need them?"  
"I'm pretty sure I'll get a pair at the hotel. I won't be using slippers anywhere else."  
"Scarf?"  
"Already on me."  
"Toothbru---"  
"Baby, are you just trying to stall me and earn time?" Kyungsoo asked, throwing Chanyeol into a loop of confused thoughts. Is he... Doing that? He might be. He didn't even realize he was until he felt the sudden sting of his own heart's rejection of the situation when Kyungsoo pointed it out.

"No, I'm sorry, I just want you to stay warm." Chanyeol said, slightly pouting, before standing up from his crossed sitting on the floor and stretching his arms. He could tell Kyungsoo's eyes were following him, trying to reach and find his own.

Hold it together. Chanyeol can't allow himself to mess up like this, Kyungsoo needs all the encouragement he can get. Going away all alone like that, for someone who isn't quite the usual social batterfly, must be pretty scary. Chanyeol himself would have been a little anxious too, and he's never had any fears about spending time away, alone, or with strangers.

After a short shared nap into the night, Chanyeol helped Kyungsoo carry his luggage into their car, and they drove to the airport together. The drive was relaxing, but unexpectedly quiet. Chanyeol with eyes on the road, and Kyungsoo with eyes on his phone's screen. Tapping away, most likely to his boss.  
"There will be a cab waiting for me at the airport when I arrive." He announced, finally placing the phone aside and leaning back against his seat comfortably.  
"Good. It's not too long of a drive away from the airport there, right?"  
"Mhm." Kyungsoo hummed in response. Chanyeol gave him a glance and noticed he's being watched himself.

Kyungsoo was looking right at his face. Big glasses hiding big eyes, hiding a big heart. Chanyeol knows that if he was the one needing to go away, he'd probably be staring at Kyungsoo as well. He'd try to memorize every detail of his face and carve it into his consciousness. The mole on his upper lip... The ones on his neck, and ears. The one on his bottom eyelid. Or the ones that can't be seen to those who don't have Chanyeol's privilege of exploring the entirety of Kyungsoo's body.

Is... Kyungsoo doing the same? Is he trying to memorize the little details about Chanyeol's face as well? Chanyeol wanted to lean in to his face and allow him to have a closer look for as long as he'd like. He can't, not while driving.

They've parked, and Chanyeol helped Kyungsoo pull the heavy suitcase out of the back of their car. Shortly after they reached the correct terminal, and in flawless synchronization, stopped in their steps at the middle of the patio. It's nearly two in the morning, so the crowd at the airport is quite sparse compared to the larger amounts of people speeding around during the hours of the day.

"So..." Chanyeol began.  
"So." Kyungsoo turned towards him, hinting a small smile.  
"Two months huh."  
"It's nothing." He ran a hand through his own hair and adjusted the glasses at the tip of his nose a little.  
Chanyeol simply looked at him quietly. It's his turn now. To absorb everything that he still can from his boyfriend before he's gone.

"I'll mis---"  
"I'll miss you."  
Both of them said at the same time. Kyungsoo chuckled lightly with a sprinkle of shyness, but this was no laughing matter.

Chanyeol's heart began aching all of a sudden. Two... Two whole months. Sixty one days are just so many days to be apart. What will he do? It's going to be so painfully lonely at home. Doing laundry for one... Cooking for one... Sleeping, for one. His pulse started drumming loudly in his ears, and a wave of unexplained stress washed over his entire body.

From the change in Kyungsoo's facial expression into a surprise, Chanyeol could only assume that this sudden surge in intense emotions of desperation was visibly seen on his face. Actually, he sensed the tensing of his muscles pulling his eyebrows tight together, and the way his jaw clenched.

"Kyungsoo." He barely whispered out, the stiffness transferred and spread through his body like fire. Now his shoulders, arms, and legs, all felt like blocks weighing a ton each.  
"B-Baby, don't cry..." Kyungsoo mumbled and stepped forward, pressing one hand on Chanyeol's chest, and using his other to gently wipe the tears gathering in Chanyeol's eyes away with his fingers.

Without saying a word, Chanyeol simply wrapped his arms around his boyfriend's body, squeezing him tightly against himself while burying his face right at the nook between Kyungsoo's neck and shoulder. He smelled so good... He smelled, like Kyungsoo. Oh... Chanyeol's going to miss this scent so much. The warmth... The sound of his heart beating, of his breathing pattern. He's going to miss Kyungsoo's arms hugging around him, and his delicate fingers stroking through his hair in the relaxing, soothing manner he always does. Just like right now.

"It'll be alright, I promise." Ah... Chanyeol will miss Kyungsoo's airy deep voice too. His whispers, his laughter... Oh god. How will he survive?  
Two hands were placed on both sides of his jaw, and pulled his face up. Just a little. Enough for Kyungsoo to lean in and plant a gentle kiss against his lips.  
"I love you." He mumbled softly before kissing Chanyeol once again. Alright, breathe, breathe. Chanyeol tried to remind himself, swallowing back the unexpected burst of emotions that took him by surprise.

"I'll call when I land. So sleep well until the morning, okay?" Kyungsoo asked in a cautious tone, grabbing onto his luggage's carrying handle from within Chanyeol's tight hold on him. Right. It's Kyungsoo's time to go. Chanyeol can't continue acting like a child. He huffed out lightly, and brushed his fingers over Kyungsoo's hand once more.  
"I love you. Have a safe flight." Finally Chanyeol spoke, voice a little raspy, but he managed to properly smile at Kyungsoo before waving at him and watching him enter the beginning of the boarding process which is inaccessible for visitors.

Then he disappeared in a turn, rolling away with the suitcase behind him.

And so... It begins.

 

 

Back at home, back in bed, Chanyeol felt a strange mixture of confidence, pride, sadness, and fear. He couldn't have been happier for Kyungsoo receiving such a great opportunity at work. But he couldn't have been more sad about the fact that he's really, fully gone for such a long period of time. They aren't children anymore, they should be able to stand on their own from afar.

This will be the first time they've been separated for such a long period of time. Kyungsoo's going to enter a whole new environment all alone... And Chanyeol will remain in his comfortable zone, surrounded by their friends who are all ready to help whenever.

Oh.

He was being a complete idiot wasn't he. A selfish little child. Chanyeol's heart sunk as he started feeling like a piece of shit once he finally realized just how horrible was the way he behaved.

The one going away on his own is Kyungsoo, the one who's going to need all the support and encouragement possible is Kyungsoo, not him. Not little emotional baby Chanyeol who can't keep his own feelings in check even when Kyungsoo needs him the most. He needed to be strong for Kyungsoo and show him that he should feel confident about leaving, he should have supported him well enough so that he wouldn't have any doubts or regrets, but instead Chanyeol nearly cried in the airport, and clung to Kyungsoo like a desperate koala bear.

Chanyeol will have his ordinary life remain the exact same, he'll be able to meet his friends and drive his car and visit his usual known places and go to the gym and sleep in his own bed... While Kyungsoo will be stuck in a country he doesn't know the language of, a foreign hotel, a bed that isn't his, new food, new noises and smells. He will be surrounded only by strangers he's never met before.

Why did he realize all of this just now? Was he in denial about the actual facts because he was too selfish deep down by not wanting Kyungsoo to actually leave?

He should have done better. He should have encouraged Kyungsoo at least a thousand times more. He should have showered him with thrice the amount of usual affection to keep him fueled for these two months, instead of acting like a needy kid with no concept of boundary or responsibility.

He should have been the pillar of strength for Kyungsoo to hold on to, but somehow he ended up being the one needing comfort instead. What a fool.

With anger on the rise, Chanyeol smacked his palm onto his face. He clicked his tongue and sighed heavily with regret and a feeling of lingering guilt. It's too late for that now. The only thing he'll be able to do from now on is be more aware. He doesn't know whether or not he failed to provide Kyungsoo with the security he possibly needed, but he knows for sure that he will have to work harder on this from now on. And supply the balanced safe haven that Kyungsoo might require from afar.

No matter how hard he thinks he's going to be having it, Kyungsoo would be going through something twice as difficult, if not more. He shouldn't lose his confidence and spirit. It'll affect the both of them for the worse, and Chanyeol would never forgive himself in Kyungsoo's bright future will be stained because of him.

The anxiety, worries, and irritation towards oneself, held him awake for quite a while. But he was still very happy to be awakened by the sound of his phone ringing with Kyungsoo's personal ringtone. It can only mean one thing.

"Baby." He answered almost immediately, eyes still shut and mind still laced with sleep. His voice was raspy and deep from the dryness of mornings.  
"Hi Chanyeolie. Did I wake you up?" Kyungsoo's voice sounded airy and tired, his surrounding was silent. He couldn't possibly be in the airport. Nor in a moving vehicle.  
"My alarm was about to ring anyway. How are you feeling? How was the flight?" Chanyeol inquired, stretching subtly under the blanket and spreading his mouth open in a silent large yawn.  
"I made it to the hotel. The room is very nice. I have a window looking right down at the main road of this business area." Kyungsoo spoke gently.

Wait... Hotel? Didn't they agree that he'd call when he landed in the airport first?  
Chanyeol finally opened his eyes, eyebrows furrowed in order to regain his vision's focus. After tapping his conversation with Kyungsoo to be on the speakers, he quickly checked his calls log.

Three missed calls from Kyungsoo... Fuck.  
Chanyeol wanted to claw his own soul out of his body. Why? How? What? He was so disappointed, sad, and angry at himself for this. These little things are what matters most, and he kept failing at each and every one of them.

"T-That's good baby. I'm so sorry I didn't answer earlier... I don't..." Chanyeol felt a lump causing his voice to sound stuffed in his throat. This is the worst... Kyungsoo doesn't deserve this at all, and he's allowing himself to mess up repeatedly. He knows it isn't something he's fully at fault for, but even having a piece of the fault feels like absolute shit.  
"It's alright baby, I'm glad you were able to sleep. I slept during the flight as well, it passed by very quickly." He could hear that Kyungsoo was smiling through his voice.

"How does the place feel? What will you be doing now?" He asked, calming himself down in order to put on his strong confident front for Kyungsoo's sake. He must be pretty anxious despite the softness of the way he speaks.

"It's really beautiful here. The city's outskirts are very traditionally designed, but at the center where I am, the buildings go almost as tall as the sky. My room's on the sixth floor! It reminds me of Gangnam a little bit. Except in chinese."  
"You'll have to show me!"  
"Yeah. I will. Now... I have about three hours to rest before starting my first day of work and meeting the team." Chanyeol could hear the some rustle noises from Kyungsoo's side of the line. He must have sat down on his bed.  
"Rest peacefully baby. You'll be just fine. I know they'd love you right away." He smiled against his phone's microphone.  
"I'm glad we talked... Have a nice day yourself. Love you."  
"I love you."

And the call ended.  
Chanyeol stared at the blank lit screen of his phone displaying Kyungsoo's contact. With eyes still sleep heavy, he sighed to himself and set the phone aside. It's fine. It's alright. Even though he missed the calls, at least they still got to talk a little bit. Kyungsoo made it safely, and Chanyeol still has two whole months to make it up for him.

He should focus on what's important for now. Which is the fact that Kyungsoo sounded, although a little nervous, fairly comfortable with his surroundings at least in the hotel room. That's one great thing to start the day with. So it'll have to do.

Instead of sinking in the feeling of self deprecation, Chanyeol swung himself out of bed with force, and headed to the bathroom. Gym, then work. Easy. He can do it.

 

 

A week passed.

Chanyeol somehow managed to remain quite optimistic about it all. Which surprised not only himself, but their friends who were already, according to them, preparing themselves for at least a miniature breakdown coming from Chanyeol by then.

Honestly, it was strange. Very strange. But Chanyeol could hold onto the bright side of the situation by forcing himself into confidence. The amount of pride he felt from the fact that Kyungsoo's away for the sake of doing an important job given to him in order to advance the position he has in his career, was stronger than anything else he felt during that week.

Of course, he waited diligently for Kyungsoo's calls. Every morning they'd happily laugh at each other's sleepy voices, and admire the quietness and peace that comes with the sound of their breathing patterns and gentle rustling sheets in bed. And every evening they'd update one another about their days, about their meals, the little things that bothered them, or the little things that made them happy.

That week was very pleasant, in fact, because Chanyeol had a lot of fun hearing Kyungsoo's peculiar explanations and observations about the new team he's supposed to supervise. Each and every one of them were so unique, and in Chanyeol's imagination, according to Kyungsoo's descriptions, they all looked like exaggerated animated characters in a cartoon.

He learned that overall, Kyungsoo thinks they're very nice. That they are all girls except for a single guy that has a very flat monotone voice while at work, but suddenly gets very expressive and loud when out of their office's limits. Kyungsoo got to walk out of the building with him, that's why he knows.

One of the girls is apparently quite tall, and Kyungsoo seemed to have been enamored by her strong presence. She's sharp and clever, has an knack for thinking numerically too. And another girl, the shortest on the team, has a really soft voice, but loves talking a lot. She's very friendly, confident and energetic, despite her nerdy looking appearance. The other two are a lot more shy and blend with their surroundings.

Each of the two easily distinguishable from one another though. One has a deeper than average nasaly voice, and the other sounds like she's going to cry any minute.

He could only hope that Kyungsoo will be able to feel at home with this bunch and successfully finish his task. Slowly coming to terms with just how great Kyungsoo's responsibility over this project is.

His boyfriend seemed to have been holding on fine. He didn't show any sign of feeling homesick or unhappy with his new current state of living. Not when he explained how strange it feels to have someone else clean after him in the hotel, or how grateful he is that he doesn't need to worry about food at all, since everything is covered and saves him the trouble of trying to communicate with the locals and embarrass himself with his lacking knowledge in chinese.

Chanyeol was fine too. Everything around him was still Kyungsoo-filled. The sheets on the bed, the living room, kitchen, everything still had a lot of Kyungsoo in it. Whether if scent, or a few leftover pieces of food Kyungsoo had cooked. To Chanyeol it felt like everyday's passing with the constant feeling that Kyungsoo's going to return home from a simple day or work soon.

 

 

Two weeks passed.

Chanyeol was still holding on to the safety of his sanity with a practically forced push of optimism. It's just that things started becoming so much harder to do for some reason.

He's used to going to the gym nearly every morning, or every night of the week, because these time periods are usually not as crowded and he's able to focus better on his own body goal rather than struggle with hidden subtle insecurities he has about it. Not that anybody other than Kyungsoo even knows about those, since Chanyeol's not one to shy from loving thyself.

But waking up and not being able to see, hear, smell, or greet Kyungsoo in the morning before leaving their apartment is extremely discouraging. Usually Kyungsoo would either be fully asleep, or he'd give Chanyeol a peck of strength, along with a line of empowerment, or a compliment to keep him pushing to work for his desired state. There's nobody to say that to him now.

Actually, not to put it as far as going to the gym, but even cooking himself a simple meal has become some kind of a burden every time he remembers he'll have nobody to share it with. Inviting Baekhyun and Junmyeon for a spontanous dinner one time was definitiely a little boost of togetherness to fight his loneliness, but not having Kyungsoo there to cook, to tease him or scold him for breaking the diet he decided upon himself, is rough.

Keeping up with a routine meant for two, as one, feels empty. He feels like he's falling behind on whatever it is he has to do even if he's doing everything just fine. Only because he doesn't have his other half of contra and security to be able to compare, or lean on, or vent to. Work is going just fine even if it feels dry. Doing chores at home feels extremely pointless. If it's only him who'll have to handle the mess he creates, then why bother cleaning? He doesn't care about it, but does it anyway. Kyungsoo would scold him if he saw this mess, afterall.

Chanyeol really is trying to maintain the usual flow of activities through the days.

Luckily he was invited to join Baekhyun, Jongdae, and Jongin to a nice restaurant bar. With the jazzy music playing in the background, the muffled sounds of the rest of the customers talking, laughing, clinking their utensils on their plates, he was able to forget about everything else for a little while.

Both Baekhyun and Jongin were unexpectedly energetic during their meeting, even before ordering any of the alcohol laced drinks from the menu. So it kept Chanyeol's spirits high, and he could joke around and laugh freely without the chaining burden of knowing he'll be returning to an empty bed afterwards.

The food was delicious, he allowed himself to eat a whole hamburger even with the bun, and dared to munch on about three fries, before Jongdae was kind enough to remind him about his diet. Chanyeol was grateful, even though he childishly felt like it was unfair that he can't eat his whole dish.

"Give them to me! I'm visiting my adorable beautiful little niece and nephew tomorrow, they'd love to have these." Jongin grinned cheerfully at Chanyeol, already grabbing onto his plate and shaking the balanced pile of fries out of the delicate balance they stood at.

Chanyeol pouted for a few moments, but didn't even bother fighting over grabbing his own plate back. Deep down he knew it's better this way.  
"Fine! Then if they have any salad leftovers you give those to me."  
Jongin stared at him in surprise, before bursting into genuine laughter.  
"Deal!"  
It's good. Jongin's laughter enabled Chanyeol to break his pout and chuckle at his own ridiculousness himself.

He told Kyungsoo that night on the phone, how Jongin and him had completed the exchange deal at the bar, and he was very glad he did that.  
"Good job baby. I'm proud of you... You're so strong for being able to give it up." He got praised by Kyungsoo... Ah. It was so worth it. Hearing Kyungsoo's voice go all soft and gentle, all filled with little bits of pride and warmth, just for him. Just for the sake of letting Chanyeol know that he's been good.

"I actually... Was also invited out to drink several times by the team. But they drink way too much. I'm a good drinker, you know, but these people... I could barely believe my eyes when they came back to work the next morning looking completely fine." Kyungsoo began talking himself, and Chanyeol shut his eyes, allowing his boyfriend's voice to flow into his consciousness and fill whatever is missing of him, heal whatever's starting to loosen.

"Did you go with them often?"  
"I did a few times, but I think I'll join only on the weekends from now on. I have to keep refusing." Kyungsoo sighed into the phone, and Chanyeol chuckled. Staring at his laptop's screen lying on his lap as he's sitting comfortably in bed.  
"Don't worry about it, I'm sure they understand."  
"Yeah... I hope so." He heard Kyungsoo's bedsheets rustle from the other side of the line.

"Baby... Do you have any recommendations for new movies or series to watch online? I ran out of content. Already watched all of the movies and seasons I downloaded in advance." Kyungsoo then asked, sounding hopeful, but at the same time embarrassed, and sad.  
Just how much time is Kyungsoo spending all alone in order to finish the hours of entertainment he had prepared in only two weeks?

It made Chanyeol's heart beat uneasily. Are things really as fine as Kyungsoo paints them to be? He knows Kyungsoo would be honest with him about these things... But then again, he knows that Kyungsoo's well aware that even if he has any issues, Chanyeol wouldn't be able to solve them from afar. So there is a very probable chance that he's dealing with something larger than what he lets on, but continues with the positive facade for Chanyeol's sake.

Did... Did Chanyeol mess up this bad before Kyungsoo left, that he's unable to fully expose the truth of the situation he's in? Or maybe Chanyeol's just overthinking this whole thing because of his own worries and loneliness?

Chanyeol was stuck in this thinking state long enough for Kyungsoo to have to call out his name again to get a response. Must have been weird for Chanyeol to be the one suddenly going silent in the middle of a conversation.

Either way, Chanyeol needs to stop imagining things. He has to trust Kyungsoo, and maybe it's actually a positive thing that Kyungsoo had enough free time to spend that he was able to keep himself occupied with movies and series. He must be working hard, and in an unfamiliar environment which requires him to keep coming to the same place every single morning, he wouldn't possibly have enough time to travel. It's all good. It has to be.

Lying in their dark bedroom all alone, Chanyeol reflected on himself through these weeks. Things are slowly changing, not quite positively, but he's still pulling through. He knows that even if he has no one at home waiting for him, he isn't alone. He has all of his friends around him within a short distance of either walking or driving, and he could easily reach all of them if he wanted to. He also knows that Kyungsoo's experiencing the same thing, in a place that isn't even home, and without having anyone around that'd come to his aid.

Chanyeol shut his eyes tightly with a heavy heart. He needs to stop thinking about these things. He's doing fine. Kyungsoo's doing fine too. They'll be just fine. It's already been this long, they can keep going.

He then rolled over the bed to Kyungsoo's side. It still... Smells like him. His pillow contains his scent... The sheets that Chanyeol still hasn't changed are still emitting a little bit of him. The small pajama set sitting folded on the shelf beside the bed is yet to be touched.

Ahh... He misses Kyungsoo so much.

It was extremely embarrassing, and frankly, shameful for Chanyeol, but he couldn't help it. He just couldn't hold back from touching himself. Lying in Kyungsoo's spot on the bed, face burried into his pillow, and his pajama shirt wrapped over Chanyeol's neck like a scarf.

His hand was firm on his length when he kept jerking faster and faster, huffing his missed lover's name and groaning with hunger for a real touch beyond the ghost of his image taking form in his imagination. He wants to touch Kyungsoo... He wants Kyungsoo to touch him. If Kyungsoo was there he'd probably be humping into him like a starved beast. It becomes a little more pleasant to work himself hard when imagining that scene happening.

But once he came into his own hand, all the scenes disappeared, the game of pretend was over, and the silent, cold, dark room was all that greeted him back from his sad orgasm's high. Chanyeol felt like crying, but he shouldn't. He's stronger than that. He has to keep holding on. It's only been two weeks, there's so much left to go.

 

 

Three weeks have passed.

Chanyeol finds it impossible to contain any optimism anymore. If until now he was able to maintain a certain level of general cheerfulness regardless of the situation, this week hit him hard with the intensity of missing his boyfriend. Especially when he realized he'll have to change his sheets and do a full basket of laundry containing the last few items that still had Kyungsoo's scent on them.

It was hard to cook, and go to gym, and focus on work before, but now he felt like life was playing in hardcore mode. Everything took a step and became twice as difficult to complete.

He started having trouble sleeping at night, now with clean new sheets and no hint of Kyungsoo's presence other than the empty side of the bed and the taken half of their closet. Chanyeol practically stopped cooking as a whole. He barely eats anything at all if it wasn't ordered from a random food place in delivery. He simply can't bother putting effort into anything involving himself on the very basic level.

So instead, he goes extra hard at what he mentally is able to do. One thing he can do is put even more effort, time, and energy into work. Staying over hours and taking tasks that are nearly beyond his abilities to complete simply so he could drown his own thoughts, emotions, and loneliness. The other being his workout regime. He raised it up a notch in order to push further and keep his mind occupied off of the negativity with extra activity.

It would have been good, really, but he knows he's doing it wrong. He knows he's pushing in the wrong directions of activities. In order to healthily increase the amount of activity he's trying to bury himself under, he knows he has to combine it with the proper amount of rest, and the correct shift in his diet. He knows it all. But he... Doesn't bother. Because it doesn't matter.

He spent these three weeks alone at home, nobody's going to judge him for what he does there as long as he acts the same and looks the same to anyone from the outside.

And that mindset also led to his downfall when it came to household chores. The apartment is in chaos. A whole mess. His smelly gym clothes are everywhere, there's dust gathering on top of shelves all over the house, the dishes in the kitchen's sink are piling in a dry stinky tower threatening to lose balance, and the trash bin has never been this full before.

Honestly, he's grossed out from staying at his very own place. But even so, he doesn't have the mental capacity to push through his sadness blockage in order to patch things up and make the place presentable for himself. It's a very destructive type of behaviour that with Kyungsoo's arrival into his life has been corrected one step at a time. But now... Without having the reason to keep this up around, while experiencing this much loneliness, Chanyeol's spiraled right into the same dark hole he started at.

He didn't know if he felt lucky, or genuinely ashamed when Jongin came over to visit unannounced one afternoon.

"What is this smell...?" Jongin asked at the moment he set a foot into the living room. Chanyeol smiled awkwardly, holding onto his own arm from behind his back and averting his eyes. He didn't expect any guests. If he knew Jongin was coming, he'd at least move the mess somewhere hidden.

The expression on Jongin's face was a direct solidification of Chanyeol's very own thoughts and feelings about the condition of the apartment, too.

"Dude, what the fuck. Are you sure you live here alone? This place looks like a bunch of smelly ass teenagers from a sports school partied here last night." Jongin's face resembled Chanyeol's own need to throw up when he covered his mouth and nose with his one hand, and picked a single crumpled tank top from the corner of the couch.  
"Shut up. I know."  
"No. You clearly don't. What the hell? Chanyeol, no offense, but this is beyond disgusting. You think that just because Kyungsoo's not here you'll be excused from being a decent human being?"

Jongin's voice was harsh, and serious, and unapologetically upset. Chanyeol wouldn't deny it was rightfully so.

He knows. He knows, he really does know that Jongin's right with his anger. And that he himself should have scolded his own ass for Kyungsoo's sake when he started falling down into this old terrible pattern.

It felt like the world was shaking around him, yet his legs were rooted to the floor like tree trunks. The shame, the frustration, the loneliness, the lack of energy to do anything for himself other than be presentable towards the outside is honestly overwhelming. He didn't realize just how obvious it was, to make Jongin go out of his way in order to come and visit just to confirm his suspicion was right.

Chanyeol eventually managed to unlock himself out of the frozen position of humiliation in the middle of his own house, and cleared out the area in the living room where they both sat down with coffee, or tea for Jongin, who's notorious when it comes to his preferences about caffeine containing drinks.

"So what's up with you, bro? You're being all fine on in front of everyone... But we all know you're not doing well. If things are getting tough you're allowed to just tell us, you know. You're not alone."  
Hearing Jongin say such words to him felt like some lava had just been poured over Chanyeol's ice cold heart. So instead of melting down properly into water, the ice cracked painfully in order to allow itself to open up.

It hurts on so many levels. The fact that hearing someone else aknowledge his pain is such a huge relief for him. A validation that he really is actually suffering and not just losing his mind over nothing. The fact that he felt like a selfish little crybaby for being so weak, and having such low tolerance when it comes to emotional struggles. The fact that he finally came to the realization that indeed, he is not alone. He's surrounded with people who love him and truly care for him. And he's been a fool for trying to bottle it all inside, instead of seeking the help and grabbing onto the widely outreached hand waiting for him to hold onto.

It hurts, but there's so much joy in this sort of pain. Because it's the cracking point which he knows will become the peak of his discomfort for future memories to remember.

"I love you guys..." Chanyeol huffed, burying his face into his palms, curling his back forward with his elbows leaning on top of his own knees.

"I just can't grab a hold of myself when Kyungsoo isn't here. It feels like a whole half of my existence is gone. I don't... Find it necessary. All of it. Cleaning... Cooking... Eating... Sleeping. These are the things I find the most relaxing and fun to do when he's around. But it feels so pointless to do all these if he wouldn't be here to enjoy them too, you know?" He raised his eyes to give Jongin a hopeful look, maybe he'll related, maybe he'll understand. But all he got was a face filled with worry, sympathy, and seriousness.

"I guess I can't fully relate... Since I haven't lived with a partner for, how many years now? So I only know what I've come to learn from observing others." Jongin began, sliding his finger into the hole of his tea mug's handle.  
"You miss him a lot, don't you? But it's not like he left. He might not be here physically, but this is still his home as much as it is yours. Wouldn't you want to keep up the pace for his sake if he was here? What difference does his presence make?"

Chanyeol sighed, cupping his palms together and leaning his chin on top of them, his eyes staring at the blank shut off television screen in front of him.  
"I'm the only one having to deal with this mess... So does it even matter? I could clean up before he returns."  
"No, the point isn't the fact that he isn't here right now." Jongin sighed and poked Chanyeol's back gently.

It was quiet for a few moments, before Jongin suddenly pulled out his phone and began tapping, aiming it up as if to look around through his phone's lenses.  
"What are you doing?"  
"Sending pictures to Kyungsoo."  
Chanyeol's heart froze in shock, he quickly pounced on Jongin and attempted to grab his device in an almost barbaric manner.  
"NO, DON'T!!"  
Jongin struggled and groaned under Chanyeol's intensity, but didn't allow him access to the phone. They kept wrestling each other like that for a bit longer, before Chanyeol finally cracked him.

"Fine--- Fine! I won't, geez!"  
"Show me that you delete the pictures." Chanyeol insisted, looming over Jongin, eyebrows tight together as he tried to see the screen.  
"I was just joking... I didn't even take any." Jongin's confession didn't convince him still. Chanyeol pushed his own arm ahead and tapped on the device's picture folder to confirm that his guest was telling the truth. There were many pictures there, of Jongin himself, or of his family members and friends, but none of the mess that is currently Chanyeol and Kyungsoo's apartment state.

Chanyeol sighed and pulled back, pulling down on his shirt a little as damage control of the struggle.  
"So why---"  
"Don't you get it? If it doesn't matter anyway, then why do you not want Kyungsoo to see it?" Jongin asked, looking directly at Chanyeol's face from up close, and fixing his own clothes back to the way they should rest against his body after the battle they've been through mere moments ago.

Chanyeol sat and stared at Jongin in silence. The gears in his mind slowly starting to get back into action.

That's... True. Does it really matter if Kyungsoo's here or not? Leaving the place in such a condition is terrible, and hiding it from Kyungsoo feels like he would be lying straight to his face in case it gets exposed. The last thing he'd ever want to do is lie to his boy.  
Why would he risk getting exposed and having to deal with the guilt and regret of allowing the state to decrease this badly and take over his feelings when Kyungsoo finds out, instead of simply keeping it the way it should be to avoid any negative worries and fears build up as a whole?

Kyungsoo might not be right there to praise him or show him how it's supposed to be done, but just like Jongin said... This house belongs to him as well. Wouldn't it be too selfish and childish of Chanyeol to destroy the balance they've created over the years? He's not a child anymore. He should be well equipped as an adult to deal with the world on his own for some time.

On top of it, Kyungsoo must be feeling these emotions as well. Although he doesn't need to actively clean up his hotel room, since that aspect is being done for him by default, Chanyeol completely forgot that it's Kyungsoo who's away.

He loves exploring new foods, but if he isn't in the mood, chances are Kyungsoo'd prefer cooking something simple and healthy for himself instead. But if he feels this lonely... As lonely as Chanyeol does... He could be having problems as well. He could be having issues with providing his own basic needs, issues with his emotions that just like Chanyeol, cause him to display a fine image on the outside but crumble on the inside and overwork himself to hide the pain.

Chanyeol's just being a big baby. Allowing his emotions to control him so strongly that he goes against his own logical mind in a protest of useless display of dissatisfaction with a situation he knew very well he'd be unhappy about from the start. Who's he trying to punish? Because the distance between Kyungsoo and him isn't going to hurt from Chanyeol's own lack of responsibility towards himself and his general duties as a functioning part of society. Only Chanyeol will be hurt from that.

He'd hate for Kyungsoo to see the mess he's caused because it'll be like a reflection of his own failures. And Chanyeol's caused enough damage by behaving like a fool when Kyungsoo needed him before. He wouldn't allow it to happen again. He wouldn't allow Kyungsoo to feel guilty and responsible for Chanyeol's very own bad decisions.

"I need to get better at this." Chanyeol rubbed both his eyes with frustration. Even with all the will power he could possibly gather, dealing with what he had already done to their place looks exhausting. He's the only one he can blame for this, though.  
"You have to keep at it, otherwise you'll lose yourself. And possibly much more than just yourself."  
"I never thought I'll hear such wise words coming from you. But, you're right. I'm just being an idiot... I have to do better." Jongin didn't seem too satisfied with Chanyeol's choice of words. He immediately puckered his lips outwards and crossed his arms in protest.

"I was just joking. Thank you. I really needed to be scolded." Chanyeol hinted a small smile in his direction, and luckily, it seemed to have softened his furrowed eyebrows back to their neutral position.  
"Will you help me?" He was too hopeful, too soon, it seems. Because Jongin's eyes shook in their sockets for a moment before stiffening up.  
"Hell no. I'm not cleaning up your gross gym clothes."  
"Come on~!"  
"Nope. No. You can't convince me."  
"Jongin... Help me clean upppppp~... Kyungsoo used to wash my dirty socks when we were just friends~!" He whined out desperately, turning to look at his friend with a pout and shoving his entire upper body over Jongin's lap to try and win enough of his affection to convince him to help.  
"Yeah, well, I'm not Kyungsoo!" Jongin took both his hands and smacked them over Chanyeol's cheeks. Rough enough to produce a sound of a light clap, but not strong enough to actually hurt. Jongin's such a gentle soul.

"I'll get you tickets for the children's show at the mall next week~ For your adorable little babies~" Chanyeol hummed out, feeling the way Jongin's hands are pressing and squishing his face, slowly getting increasingly amused.  
"You're bribing me?"  
"Call it, paying for your labor." Chanyeol cleverly responded. He knew Jongin stands no chance against something that'll be given to his beloved nephew and niece. Jongin burst out into short laughter before shoving Chanyeol's whole head away from his lap with a small smile.

"Fine, consider it a deal."

Jongin gave in, and the two of them, but still mainly Chanyeol, from obvious reasons, did their best. Proudly succeeding in fixing up the place almost entirely back to its normal state of existence. Clean, and clear, and not smelling like gym clothes and dried food. The dishes were done, the laundry was in the washing machine's cycle, the dust has been wiped off, the floor shining clean and even the carpets vacuumed. It was a home again.

There were not enough words for Chanyeol to use in order to express the depth of his gratitude towards Jongin's selfless acts. Coming over to check on him, comforting him and cheering him up, giving him reassurance about his valuable member of their group of friends, and even literally cleaning the house with him. How much good can be contained in one person? In Jongin's case, endless, it seems.

After being forced by his guest to cook a proper dinner for the both of them, they spent some more time playing some games together and genuinely enjoying each other's company until it was late enough for Jongin to leave.

It timed out perfectly, because Chanyeol had just enough time to transfer the laundry into the dryer and get himself ready for bed before Kyungsoo would call him. And for a change, he was prepared for the call with an actual, real, good mood.

 

 

"How's my baby doing today?" He asked extra affectionately right after answering the video call coming from his lover. Kyungsoo's face, as always, was uncomfortably close to his phone's lens, but it was the most adorable sight Chanyeol will never get tired of. So instead of even mentioning anything about it, he grinned happily when noticing the way Kyungsoo's lips quivered into a tiny smile.

"Hi baby. I miss you." His voice was gentle, a hint of shyness lingered behind his airy tones. Oh, how much Chanyeol loves him.  
"I do too."  
"You look so happy today... Jongin wrote to me that he came to visit. I'm really glad." Kyungsoo smiled warmly at his phone's screen. He was lying sideways on his bed, his head half sunken into the pillow, and behind him was the decorated wallpaper of his hotel room and a wall mounted lamp.

Chanyeol felt just a sting of stress pricking his mind for a moment, before remembering his conversation with Jongin, and reminding himself of the resolutions he has come to, and will have to act upon. No need to be nervous. Jongin's got his back.

"Yeah! Although uninvited, he was treated to a dinner."  
"Oh, how generous of you." Kyungsoo teased him, his eyes shifting into sparkly thin crescents before a short yet genuine laughter came out.  
"How was work today? Did you eat enough yourself?" Chanyeol leaned back against the bed as well. His body was seeking the touch whenever Kyungsoo's in sight, so to battle the unrealistic urge to break through the screen separating them in order to spawn right where Kyungsoo is, he moved his free hand up and down on the mattress of the empty side of the bed.

"I ate well. Ordered a really nice dumpling soup that came with an extra bowl of fried rice." Kyungsoo explained. There's always passion in his eyes when the subject being talked about is food. Chanyeol adores the way he's interested in constantly improving himself on that matter.  
"At work... Uhm." The atmosphere turned from the laid back ease to a short silence of stress. Kyungsoo averted his eyes away from the screen, and shut his lips tightly together, worrying Chanyeol a little bit before shifting his position on the bed.

"Remember Jia Zhou? The girl with the deep voice that looks pretty generic--- But still pretty?" Kyungsoo asked, he didn't look as cheerful anymore, but at least there didn't seem to be anything seriously awful in whatever it is he will be saying. So Chanyeol halted himself from creating imaginary issues in his mind.  
"Yeah."  
"I uh... I found out that she, doesn't... Uhm. She does't approve of same sex couples. Actually she's quite against it." He continued, voice getting smaller and eyes wandering around his faraway hotel room view, anywhere away from facing Chanyeol directly. But it was easily noticable that this fact had caused Kyungsoo a large enough amount of pain to get him this nervous.

Chanyeol's heart broke a little bit. As if being this far away from everything Kyungsoo knows isn't scary enough for him, now there is a person right there with him that would have dismissed his entire existence as a human if she knew about Kyungsoo's orientation.

"Oh baby..." He could feel his own eyebrows slowly tensing on his forehead with worry.  
"She's really so nice and kind. It was so surprising to learn..." It seemed that simply speaking about it was actually a small source of relief for Kyungsoo.  
"Everyone else didn't seem to agree with her, which is reassuring. But... I guess I'm just feeling really nervous around her now... I feel like I'm being so awkward because I can't talk freely when she's around." He elaborated some more as Chanyeol nodded sympathetically.

"I'm sorry that I didn't tell them about us--- And now... I won't be able to." Kyungsoo's voice shrunk again, the camera's view panned upwards, and a little over Kyungsoo's shoulder. Chanyeol noticed something odd located right behind Kyungsoo's back in the bed. It looked like a fabric of a shirt was folded, as if worn, right against his back.

No. Chanyeol. Don't.  
It felt like time froze when he noticed that detail. That fabric definitely does no belong to Kyungsoo's own collection of shirts. And it looks like it's filled with some substance keeping it tall enough to be seen.

Kyungsoo's lying in bed... An unknown shirt being worn by someone who's lying right behind him is peeking in his live video call with Chanyeol. That's all Chanyeol's mind could detect from the new short lasting perspective he got.

"Don't apologize baby, it's very scary to reveal such things to strangers. There's no need to worry. They don't have to know everything about you. You aren't ashamed of me and I know it. Right?" Chanyeol asked, burning his own awful thinking process off his mind and memories as a whole.

He needs to stop. He's being stupid. He's starting to think like an idiot again.  
Kyungsoo's expressing his honest deep worries to him from afar, and all he can think of is the possibility of someone being there with him? Right after he just explained how scared he is from the fact that his coworker expressed homophobia? Come on, he has to grow up already. What's with this sudden panic. He would have never even thought anything remotely similar to whatever's spinning in his mind if it wasn't the separation between them messing with him. Or is it fair of him to put the blame on that reason?

"Of course. I love you. The weather's starting to cool down too... I really miss you when it's cold." Kyungsoo responded, audibly and visibly relieved from Chanyeol's supportive reaction, and even more so, he looked like the shyness was creeping up on his face a little more. His cheeks taking on a light shine of pink.  
Chanyeol's whole heart was freaking out in all directions. He can't imagine loving anything more than he does seeing Kyungsoo's impossibly adorable display of emotions through his face.

Kyungsoo then shifted a little more in the bed, turning the phone just enought for Chanyeol to be able to see the full display of the fabric owner that is located behind Kyungsoo's body.

He definitely is, undoubtedly, an absolute fool.  
Chanyeol's heart clenched hard in his chest upon seeing the view of Kyungsoo's whole bed.

Behind him lied a line of pillows placed one above the other in a row, and the unknown fabric peeking behind his lover's shoulder was none other than Chanyeol's very own missing shirt that he was sure he forgot at the gym weeks ago.

"B-Baby, what's that on the bed beside you?" Chanyeol gulped, eyes wide with a mixture of relief, curiousity, and shock.  
Kyungsoo's reaction was another unexpected turn of events. His eyes widened as well, and he quickly turned his head towards the pillows beside him. In a split of a second he turned the phone away from seeing any further, his face turning redder by the second.

"I-It's---... T-The weather, and... I couldn't sleep, so..." He began stuttering with obvious embarrassment.  
"Baby, what was that? Tell me, please, why is my shirt there?" Chanyeol's heart was pumping, all guilt inducing thoughts long gone from his mind, and were now replaced with a flow of less family friendly content and images.  
"I took it with me because---... I knew I'd miss you too much. So I..." Kyungsoo began his attempt to explaining, and Chanyeol had to force his jaw back up after it dropped.

"I built my own Chanyeol out of pillows and dressed them like you---! Okay?! So don't--- Say anything!" He turned the phone's camera away from his face so that only his forehead and the edge of his glasses are peeking into the frame.  
"Baby--- Oh my god." Chanyeol's heart was pumping out of control. It'd jump right out of his chest if it wasn't for his ribcage blocking that from happening.

He could barely digest the amount of emotions that are overflowing from every fiber of his being from learning these details. His boyfriend is the only person that matters on this planet. Nothing else existed anymore. Chanyeol's entire face and body turned hot with the images of Kyungsoo snuggling against the pillar of pillows dressed as Chanyeol in order to fall asleep at night.

What. The. Fuck.  
He's about to explode.

"I love you, baby, oh, I love you so much. I miss you too. Kyungsoo, I can't believe... Baby. I love you." Chanyeol's mouth wouldn't stop pouring breathless confessions out of the excitement.  
He watched with extra focused attention how Kyungsoo grabbed onto his own pillow and pressed it against his own face in order to hide from the camera's view.  
"... I--- I love you too--- But stop, I'm so embarrassed..."  
"I can't, I love you. You're my number one. You're my angel, my earth, my moon, you're so precious--- More beautiful than a diamond, brighter than the sun--- Baby, I'm so happy! I love you. I love you!" It's always easy to know he's being serious when he starts speaking poetically.

Nothing exists but Kyungsoo.

That night the two of them had a heated session of steamy displays to show each other over the cameras of their devices.

Kyungsoo's embarrassment disappeared soon after, and was replaced with the eager urge to show Chanyeol exactly what he's missing in China by providing a detailed, zoomed in, clear view of his ass bouncing on top of a dildo Chanyeol didn't even know he brought along for the trip.

And Chanyeol was more than overwhelmed by the show of both the lower action but also the hunger sparking in Kyungsoo's eyes when Chanyeol's fully erect dick came into view.

It was pretty funny when they were done and lying back in their beds. Chanyeol was enamored by the sight of Kyungsoo's sleeping face while laughing at the two of them in his head for how short they lasted this time. It was hot, and quick, and well, satisfing. So he couldn't complain.

He almost regretted not recording their call and everything that happened in it. But less than a second later he felt like a creepy pervert for even thinking that. So he shook his thoughts off and instead pecked the screen of his phone, right on top of Kyungsoo's squished cheek in display, and shut off their call.

The amount of energy he had regained thanks to that whole day was insane. Like a boost of injected pure force. Jongin's angelic selfless heart, and Kyungsoo's heavenly affection and satisfaction were like a health potion that restores all of the warrior's stats in a single turn. He can do anything now, he felt invincible. It's been three weeks already, they're almost halfway through, it's nothing.  
They can do it.

 

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

 

 

 

A month had passed.

If Chanyeol thought they could easily pass the the rest of this torture apart easily, he was wrong. He wouldn't have jinxed it for himself if he knew how wrong he was.

His phone broke.  
At the gym in the morning, he was checking his phone while on one of the machines, not paying much attention to his surrounding. But one other gym visitor knocked it out of his hand. Almost like in a slowmotion scene of a movie, Chanyeol attempted to leap after the phone and save it from danger, but it flew too fast, and then slid across the floor too fast. Stopping right underneath the drop of the weightlifter's act of dropping the weights down.

Looking back at it, Chanyeol finds it hilarious himself. Really, just how much bad luck does one need to have for their phone to be flying straight to the spot the weights would be dropping. The guy who knocked the phone of course apologized like his life depended on it, and Chanyeol, although upset, had decided this poor soul does not deserve to be struck by his wrath.

What Chanyeol didn't find hilarious, however, was the fact that now he has no way of contacting Kyungsoo. Not until he goes out to purchase a new device. And that was enough to put him at the edge of a nervous breakdown.

The important parts of his broken device were actually still fully intact and retrievable. At least that's what his tech genius friend Jongdae said when he rushed to his place straight after work that evening.

He loves visiting Minseok and Jongdae's place. It's a large apartment located right above Minseok's self owned coffee shop. So it always smells like warm coffee, freshly baked sweets, and a whiff of the fragrance that cleaning materials always leave. Plus, Minseok of course makes the best coffee around.

Minseok was showing a fair amount of curiousity as the two sat in his and Jongdae's living room and examined little pieces of the crushed machine. He sat himself down on the armchair and crossed his legs before taking out his own phone.

"Should I let Kyungsoo know then?"

Chanyeol's head immediately turned in Minseok's direction, like a hunting carnivore that just heard his prey's foot step on a thin branch.  
"W-Wha---"  
"Minseok!! Let me call him!! Please!!" Chanyeol almost pounced to the far end corner of the couch, placed his elbows on the armchair Minseok was seated on, and held both his hands together.  
"Hey, careful you buffoon!" Jongdae whined, quickly placing both his hands on the living room's coffee table to stop it from shaking and messing up the order in which he placed Chanyeol's own phone pieces at.

He didn't even feel any shame in the obvious beg. Quite the opposite actually, Chanyeol mustered every muscle of his face to create the saddest most desperate expression he could provide. He'd do anything for his goal of contacting Kyungsoo. Just for a short call, just to let him know.

Minseok nearly jumped in his spot from Chanyeol's quick response, but then sharpened his eyes and squeezed his mouth sideways. Silently judging just how dire Chanyeol's state is to allow him the luxury of contacting his beloved boyfriend. He lingered in the silence for a while, pulling the strings to Chanyeol's urgency a little further.

"P-Please, I'll be quick--- I just want to update him!" Chanyeol persisted, lowering his head down and shutting his eyes as if in prayer. Minseok loves being worshipped like a god when he has an advantage. But also when he's clearly joking.

"Of course you can call him, puppy." He broke the tense thin line of electricity in the air with an amused grin. Chanyeol's head rose in relief and excitement. Both Minseok and himself laughed shortly before Minseok tapped on his screen a few times and placed the device in Chanyeol's already reached out palms.

"Take your time~" Minseok smiled, pressing a hand on Chanyeol's head gently, as if to bless him.  
"Oh, kind lord, worthy am I of such goods?" Chanyeol bowed his head once more just to pull out another roll of laughter from Minseok, along with an entertained whine from Jongdae's dissactisfaction about the amount of drama he's forced to witness.  
Shortly after, he stood up and entered his friends' guest bedroom to speak to his lover in peace.

That went... Surprisingly well. As Chanyeol described in full detail everything that had happened to his poor phone, Kyungsoo sounded highly amused, and laughed for a healthy moment before calling Chanyeol an idiot. And telling him that he loves him.

Chanyeol promised he'll replace the device the very next morning, and the call ended with the sound of the both of them creating a loud fake 'Mwuah' sound with their lips. How embarrassingly adorable that is. Chanyeol was relieved that neither of the pair whose house he's currently at could see or hear him.

He'd never hear the end of it if Jongdae was present for that exchange. Especially after the time in highschool Jongdae caught him kissing a teddy bear with a plastered picture of Kyungsoo over its face.

The original plan of getting a new device, however, was unfortunately changed when he woke up way too late to make it in time for any of the cellphone stores before work. He had to battle against his own feelings of guilt and regret for missing his first chance to regain the constant contact with his faraway lover, but kept his head high and decided to focus on using the rest of his day efficiently instead of drowning in self misery for a silly mistake.

Instead, he rushed to the nearest one in his path and purchased a brand new device right after work. Upon reaching home, he sat down with his restaurant bought healthy meal and assembled the chips and memory cards into their slots, just like Jongdae had instructed him the previous day. A message of confirmation had popped up, and along with it, the announcement of the phone's activation happening somewhere between thirty minutes and an hour.

He had just enough time to finish his food without a rush and even wash up after the nerving day. Correct to its own prediction, Chanyeol heard the bling of his reconnection to the network's data. He had his arm half reached towards the phone in order to begin fiddling with the settings and preferences, but it already began whirring due to vibration on the shelf and playing the default incoming phonecall tune. Huh?

Well, he expected Kyungsoo to call at some point in the night, but he didn't know it'd be happening right at the moment his phone would be activated. What a pleasant coincidence. Cheerfully he raised it to his ear and slid the green symbol to answer.

 

 

"Hello? Chan...Yeol, right?"

An unfamiliar voice spoke from the other side of the line. Chanyeol was so surprised his tongue got caught in his mouth, and he silently pulled away the device to confirm that the caller's contact was indeed Kyungsoo's number. Could his contacts have been switched or messed up? Perhaps they got corrupted with the crash.

"Uh, yes, it's Chanyeol speaking."  
"Phew, alright, good." The voice continued. Chanyeol heard a weird pattern of walking echoing on the floor of wherever that person is located. They sounded a little short of air too.  
"I just wanted to inform you that Kyungsoo's fine. He's very drunk, so I'm dropping him in his hotel room."

Chanyeol was quite speechless from the surprise. This must be one of Kyungsoo's coworkers then, right? Otherwise they wouldn't have known how to use his phone and speak korean this well. Though along with the surprise, he felt immense relief. Knowing that there's someone out there willing to take care of Kyungsoo like this is quite reassuring that he's in pretty good hands.

"Oh, he's drunk? Thank you for taking care of him like this." Chanyeol smiled into the conversation gently, hearing the soft beep of Kyungsoo's hotel room being unlocked. There were a few more huffs and thuds, but eventually he heard the sound of the bed springs creaking and a sleepy mumble coming from his boyfriend's mouth.  
"Yes, yes, I've got you. You're in bed honey, just sleep." The voice said, having the phone probably pulled away from their mouth.

Now that there was no more fear or worry in Chanyeol's heart about the situation, he exhaled calmly and listened more carefully. The person speaking to him was one of his female coworkers for sure, sounding a little nasaly, and very motherly. He couldn't exactly identify which of the team members it is. But it didn't matter, he was very grateful regardless.

"Have you been with him when he drank before?" The woman asked him, then sighed heavily right after.  
"None of us even realized he was drunk until he began talking about being able to use magic, and tried to reenact a scene where his phone will get crushed under a beer bottle." She continued, sounding tired, but highly amused.  
Chanyeol felt his heart strings strum a little while imagining the situation. Kyungsoo really does listen to him well. Even if at times it seems like he doesn't care. His memory isn't the best, but the situation of Chanyeol's phone breaking must have been pretty memorable if he did something like that while being drunk.

He couldn't help but laugh lightly into the phone, the woman joined along for a chuckle.  
"He's such a sweetheart. Made us all laugh so much until we decided to free him from the misery." The woman hummed in a gentle tone. Her voice sounding quite deep and mature now when she had fully regained her breath from the effort of helping Kyungsoo reach the hotel safely.

"Normally he's quite a good drinker actually, so these are quite the news." Chanyeol teased.  
"Ahh, that's what he said as well. Guess he has ways to go." The woman agreed. The atmosphere of the conversation was very pleasant.  
"Anyway, if you don't mind me asking, who are you? I called Kyungsoo's first contact and it reached you." She asked, and Chanyeol heard her heels tapping lightly on the hotel room's floor.  
"I'm just curious, don't mean to pry." She reassured.

"Oh, I'm Kyungsoo's boyfriend." Chanyeol answered with a proud grin. And heard silence coming from the other side of the line for quite a long while after.

"O-Ohh, alright. I see."  
Shock was the least intense way to describe just how surprised she sounded to learn that information.

"He's really a gem. A selfless, wonderful, kind person. I'm sure that you're just as great." She said, sounding like she's coming to terms with an internal conflict she's experiencing.  
"Haha, I'm highly flattered. Thank you for taking care of my baby." Chanyeol felt warmth wash over him. And so much pride. It was the best compliment he had received so far. Knowing that not only does his boyfriend leave such an impression on people, but that Kyungsoo's that high up there, that his partner must be around that same realm of existence in order to have that position in the first place, in their eyes.

"B-Baby... Yeah. Okay. Goodbye now, Chanyeol." She greeted in a respectful tone at last, and ended the conversation.

Ahh... What a relief. Knowing that Kyungsoo is in such good hands. Whoever she was, she sounded reasonable and genuinely good.

Now that he knows his baby is well asleep, Chanyeol could ease down and get back to adjusting his new phone's settings according to his preferences. All while debating with himself who that mysterious coworker of Kyungsoo must have been. He didn't quite remember all of their names, or descriptions of voices beyond his very vague first impressions. Maybe it's the tall girl? Or perhaps one of the shy pair of the group?

He hummed to himself peacefully while fiddling with the phone, before a rush of horrid realization hit him at once.

Shit.

What did he do?

Only days ago Kyungsoo had vented his worries and fears about exposing the truth about his orientation with one of his coworkers who turned out to be a homophobe.

Chanyeol's heart dropped to the bottom of his body and his limbs fell numb beside him as well. With wide eyes he stared at nothing in particular in front of him, and started freaking out. What if the worker that helped Kyungsoo was the one that expressed their irrational fear of other human beings who feel love? She sounded way too nice, though. And she was way too kind to be one of those, right?

There was nothing Chanyeol could do now. The conversation had already happened, the truth had already been told, and there's no stopping it now. He could only hope that somehow he didn't fuck Kyungsoo's entire stay there up somehow. Exposing such a truth to anyone, especially strangers that Chanyeol doesn't know, but that have such a great important in Kyungsoo's current situation is dangerous.

How could he have done it?

He felt like tearing the hair off of his scalp from stress and fear. Motionlessly he sat there, the waves of worry, and intense regret kept washing against his heart from the inside.

That night, the most Chanyeol could have done in hopes of preventing the possible result of the, maybe, damage that he had caused, was lie in bed and pray for his boyfriend's safety and well being. Chanyeol really, will not forgive himself until the end of time, if he had caused Kyungsoo any sort of harm by being a tactless, absentminded idiot.

It's especially painful for Chanyeol because not only does he crumble under the regret of acting so carelessly when it came to that one extremely sensitive subject, but also because he feels guilty for struggling about possibly being selfish himself for having any issues at all. Whoa, that's an endless cycle of doom right there that Chanyeol had gotten himself into.

No sleep for the wicked.

 

 

"Chanyeolie... Baby... What did you do last night? Did we call?" Kyungsoo asked him on the phone the next day once he called. Chanyeol has been dreading this moment. He was scared, nervous, worried. Kyungsoo's tone of voice sounded calmer than he'd imagine he must be feeling right now.

He remained silent for a few moments, panicking inside his mind about the consequences of his silly slip up, and about the guilt he'll be carrying with him for the rest of his life. Regardless, he did his best to contain the intensity of his anxious emotions and sighed.

"Not... Exactly? You got drunk with your coworkers last night, right? Well, one of them called me through your phone, since I'm your number one contact..." Although saying such words would have supposed to be giving out hints of happiness, excitement, maybe even shyness, right now the fear is overwhelming.  
"Oh, it must have been Jia Zhou then." Kyungsoo replied right away, like thinking to himself out loud. That name however, rang a bell of distress in Chanyeol's chest.

He really did mess up. That is most definitely the name of the only one woman in Kyungsoo's team that had expressed homophobic tendencies.

"She asked me who I was and I---... I'm so sorry baby, I wasn't thinking at all--- I told her I was your boyfriend." Chanyeol heard the way his own voice was trembling.

"Y-You did? Ahh..." Kyungsoo's voice however, rather than upset, disappointed, or even slightly worried, sounded... Shy?  
"So that's why she kept asking me today about it... She was being really kind, and followed me all day, pleading for me to tell her more about 'my partner'." He continued. Chanyeol's heart started slowing back down from the stress that it had been drumming to until now.

He... Didn't mess up? Or rather, he messed up, but it still turned out to be okay? Weight identical to the entirety of planet earth's had just been lifted from his chest.

"I... I will show her a picture of us next time... Since she knows..." Kyungsoo's voice was small and gentle. Chanyeol's heart was also small and gentle right now.  
"Will it be alright if I do?"  
The amount of relief he felt was indescribable. He could have messed this whole thing up big time, but it seems that the revalation about their type of realtionship had spread new light in Kyungsoo's teammate's life.

"Baby? Are you here?" Kyungsoo asked, Chanyeol only then realized he had been stuck in silence for a while.  
"Y-Yes, I am. Oh god, I'm so glad... I was so scared that I foolishly exposed something that shouldn't have been known... You mentioned before that she was the one who went against such things, but when she called I had no idea it was her, and---"  
"Baby, it's alright, it's okay. I actually... Planned to tell it to her myself, but you saved me a lot of anxiety by doing it that way." Chanyeol's words were cut off with Kyungsoo's own, and he felt like he could finally breathe again.

He exhaled heavily and shut his eyes. The sensation of the white noise that took over his entire body was finally draining away from the tips of his fingers and feet. It was like a sort of emotional cleanse to finally be updated of the good results of a situation he thought would destroy everything.

"Were you really that nervous?" Kyungsoo asked, a smile across his face from the other side of the line.  
"Mhmm..." Chanyeol responded with a lame sounding hum. His boyfriend chuckled softly.  
"I love you. I'll never be ashamed of you, or want to hide you. If someone has a problem with you, they have a problem with me, too." Chanyeol felt his heart shake from a different reason now. His eyes felt damp when he opened them again, and he felt a surge in warmth flowing through him. Kyungsoo always knows the right words to say at the right moments.

"Will you send me the picture you took of us in the airport before I flew here?" He asked gently, sounding calm, and happy, and bashful.

Kyungsoo is extremely humble, and doesn't tend to show off or boast about anything related to himself. Which often results with the lack of Chanyeol representation outside of his closer circle of known people. So the fact that he's willingly asking for content of the two of them in order to do just these things, made Chanyeol remember the tingle of when he felt just how much value he has in Kyungsoo's life for the first time years ago.

"Only if you send me a picture of you with your team." Chanyeol grinned sheepishly, hearing his lover's chuckle over the line in response. Ah... He loves him. Chanyeol loves him so much. He was almost able to see the light at the end of this tunnel of responsibilities separating them.

 

 

Another week passes.

Just like Chanyeol had tried to remind himself many times now while dealing with the struggles of the separation from Kyungsoo, the grass isn't always greener on the other side.

For himself, things are going quite alright. He's taking better care of himself. Of his healthy diet, of his bodily condition and working out regime, of the state of cleaniness at home, of his tasks at work, and everything else that has to do with living on his own.

But for his beloved boyfriend things are starting to get bumpy.  
More than anything, he's very glad that Kyungsoo was able to express his stress and worries about the situation to him. Kyungsoo's not one to be easily swayed by his social surroundings or pressure at work. But combining the shift in his job with the distance from everything that's familiar in his life makes his struggle very valid and understandable.

Over this week, every time they call, something else adds up to the list of negative aspects included in his experience.

It started with an issue in his team's system, that forced them to perform an almost full reset to all the progress they've made on their project. Which resulted in Kyungsoo needing to work twice as hard as he had until that moment. Spending nights as days at work in order to help his team do the job successfully.

He has to do it, he's their supervisor, he's the one that's supposed to bring them back on track when things go askew. He has to make sure they're doing fine. Their quality of work and production reflects directly on his management skills. More than just their checks lie on the line. But even if it was only their checks, and none of it would have benefitted Kyungsoo, Chanyeol knew he would have still done exactly the same anyway.

More than just being thoroughly exhausted and drained, spending extra hours at work, most of the time on his own, means that there's nobody else there to take care of his condition. Chanyeol felt stings all over his body when Kyungsoo told him that he barely gets to eat or sleep anymore.

This evening so far, was especially worrying for Chanyeol.

"I can't just leave the office, even if it's time to go, you know. There's so much work they need to catch up on, but they have other responsibilities and things to take care of. Their lives are here, mine's over there with you. I can spare a few more hours..." Kyungsoo explained, voice quiet with obvious weariness.

"I know, baby. But isn't it getting too much? Have you eaten and slept at all since yesterday?" Chanyeol inquired, eyebrows held tightly together as he stared at the dark circles under Kyungsoo's eyes on his screen.

The silence following his question was the answer he didn't want to hear. Kyungsoo averted his eyes sideways with a combination of dissappointedment in himself, and disappointement at the fact that he's disappointing Chanyeol.

"Please do get something to eat tomorrow baby. I don't like seeing you in such a condition." Chanyeol eased down his voice, trying to provide a sense of comfort to Kyungsoo. To ressure him that he really isn't angry, it just hurts to be a bystander. He did not expect to see Kyungsoo's eyebrows furrow.  
"If you don't want to see me like this then maybe we should just stop calling." He could barely believe these words came out of Kyungsoo's mouth. Especially in such a cold, angry tone.

His eyes widened as he stared at his boyfriend's sunken face in surprise. He would have known that it was a joke immediately, if it actually was one. They often tease each other in similar ways. But... But with this much charged energy, that tone, and serious face, Chanyeol's whole soul was a little shaken by the idea of Kyungsoo actually believing it.

"N-No, baby. No. I'm sorry---... I didn't mean it, I'm sorry..." Kyungsoo's face shifted, his expression was filled with so much pain and regret.  
"I really didn't mean it--- Please don't hang up. I'm sorry, I just..." His lips began quivering and his eyes shake in their sockets in fear.

"Kyungsoo, what's going on baby?" Chanyeol asked, tightening the grip on his phone. He must not let this get to him. Kyungsoo's in one of the worst lows he's ever been to, Chanyeol knows that these words are just the menifestation of Kyungsoo's negativity pooling together. He has to be the strong pillar on which his boy could rely on without a doubt.

The camera on Kyungsoo's side of the call has been turned upwards to the ceiling, and it was silent for a few moments of anxious curiousity on Chanyeol's side, until he heard it.  
Kyungsoo's sniff. A wet, quiet, shameful sniff.

"Baby--- Baby, let me see you." Chanyeol felt a shiver run from the core of his body and out to the edge of his limbs. Kyungsoo was crying.

It took a few more covered sniffles for the camera to be turned back to Kyungsoo's face. He looked miserable. He looked like he was in so much agony, heartbreakingly sad. His eyes now shining and gushing with slow streaming tears, his nose reddened and his eyebrows shaking, battling the urge to fully stretch into a state of pure sadness.

Chanyeol's throat choked up. His heart started thumping loudly in his ears.

"Chanyeolie---" He cried out his name shakingly. "I'm sorry--- I just miss you so much---... I wish you were here--- Or that I was there..." He sniffled, helplessly wiping the new layer of tears with his sleeve.  
"I miss you, I want to feel you--- And hear you--- I want to go back home, I want..." He continued, even his crying looked tired and lacked energy.  
"I want to sleep... With you beside me..." The intensity of his emotions was slowly decreasing, he went quiet and continued to silently wipe his face clean with his sleeves. Leaving Chanyeol speechless, and Chanyeol's heart aching.

"I love you, so let's... Let's not stop calling, please..." Kyungsoo mumbled some more, looking like his systems are slowly shutting down. And considering the fact that he was having trouble sleeping, maybe it's a good thing that he's finally reaching the point where his body's giving in.

"I love you, sleep well baby." Chanyeol finally regained control over his own vocal cords, and by the time he finished his sentence, Kyungsoo fell deep asleep.

Chanyeol could only stare in silence and digest what had just happened. Kyungsoo's really at the edge of his bearings. Whatever it is he's going through over there is more intense, and more serious than Chanyeol had realized. All of the parameters of his situation are somehow colliding, leaving Kyungsoo struggling for air in between the waves of chaos.

 

 

He hung up the call only after staring at Kyungsoo's sleeping face for about ten minutes. Just taking it in. Just basking in the fact that he can see him at all. Thank technology for the option to be talking with each other and be seeing each other from such long distances.

There's more to expect on their path. Chanyeol knew now, that he has to be prepared better, and for what might become far worse.

His inability to do anything about the situation was frustrating, infuriating, really. No matter how he turns it around, there isn't a single thing he could do that would be of more assistance then simply answering Kyungsoo when he calls, and talking with him.

Chanyeol knew he has to be strong, but the burden of his worries kept weighing down on him after that night. Getting heavier with each passing day in which he could not assist with anything beyond attempting his best at cheering Kyungsoo up and encouraging him to comply to his basic human needs as a living creature.

Because of that, the negativity only continued to develop in him. He started feeling stressed for no apparent reasons, and noticed on himself that his attitude has been slowly turning more hostile and impatient towards unsuspecting innocent people around him.

That's unfair. He shouldn't be punishing his environment, or himself, just because he's worried. That's something Kyungsoo wouldn't have wanted, and that goes against the great memorable advice Jongin had given him on his last visit.

"Alright. I've had enough of your rude ass, you need to chill." Sehun pouted in Chanyeol's direction and proceeded to demonstrate his anger by biting onto another piece of the cake slice in his plate.

Chanyeol opened his mouth to speak back, but once he caught a glance at Junmyeon's tired expression, he simply sighed out and took a new bite of his own slice of cake to keep himself shut. He felt quite bad for acting his aggressive towards his own friends. Junmyeon and Sehun invited Baekhyun and him over for a relaxing afternoon hang out. They've got enough trouble on their hands themselves, to have the energy to deal with his.

The moving process keeps being delayed, and they're both tired of living the minimal life without some of their packed essentials lying in boxes all over their place. His worries are valid, but it'd be unfair of him to project his own sadness and stress upon them.

"Come on man, hold it together. You're not even the one being affected by it." Baekhyun patted Chanyeol's back lightly and finally swallowed his bite.  
"Wait, I know! You need something to chill you out, calm you down, let you take out the bad evergy, right?" He then spoke again, turning to look at Chanyeol's slumped expression hanging above his half eaten cake.

Baekhyun's ideas are always somewhat irrational and yet make the perfect sense at the same time. Maybe he could actually come up with something that'd be useful for Chanyeol's situation. The two of them sort of are in the same boat, except Baekhyun and Yixing's relationship has always been that way. And Baekhyun's way more financially mobile and able to afford acting upon his desires and wishes with Yixing, even if it means flying over to China just for several hours to spend together.

It's not like Chanyeol and Kyungsoo are struggling with money, but Chanyeol has the tendency to be an impulse spender. When something catches his interest, it's going to take an immense amount of energy to prevent himself from buying it immediately. And it took both him and Kyungsoo a hefty long process to work on in order to fix it.  
If it was up to him, he would have purchased a ticket to visit, or even stay with Kyungsoo in China.

He knows better. Or at least he thinks he does, although he's very tempted.

"Let's go party tonight!! I already had a tentative plan with Minseokie," Baekhyun suggested in an excited all-knowing tone, raising his finger up in the air while smiling widely in Chanyeol's direction. Something in that gesture reminded Chanyeol of Yixing.  
"You two are also invited~" He turned to wink at the other two, their current hosts.

Chanyeol sighed. His initial thought was that this suggestion, like many others, is ridiculous. And will have no benefit or contribution to Chanyeol's mental state. Isn't it going to cause him to feel the opposite of his goal? Partying means going to the only club in their city that openly welcomes LGBTQ+ members. And being in a club means he will be forced to see many people frolicking around. It'd only make him think, miss, and worry more about Kyungsoo.

He thought he'd be hearing an immediate response of disapproval from Junmyeon. But instead, when looking in his direction, he found Junmyeon seriously contemplating. With a finger on his chin and all. Is he really considering going?

"Honestly, that's not a bad idea." Junmyeon hummed, turning his head in Sehun's direction as if to persuade him to participate.  
"Sadly I'm going to decline, but you could go." He petted his partner's shoulder gently to encourage him.

Sehun gave Chanyeol a glance before raising his mug to sip from.  
"Sure, I can come along."  
"Nice!! We're settled then. Minseokie, Sehunie, and I will be watching over you. So you could go as wild as you wish." Baekhyun clapped his hands together with satisfaction, and when grinning to Chanyeol, he smacked his back a little roughly.

Well... That's actually reassuring. Losing his tight grip on consciousness while knowing there will be someone to take care of him sounds very appealing in his state. Will it be selfish of him to accept it, while Kyungsoo's not going to get the same treatment?

"You know what... Why not. If Sehun's going it can't be that bad." Chanyeol huffed with a pout, but made sure to look at Baekhyun's reaction to the tease.  
"Hey!" As expected, his over expressive shout was satisfactory, and Chanyeol laughed lightly. "But yeah, it'll be good!"

The only resentment he had about it, rather than the fear of him possibly doing something bad when drunk, is that if he goes out during the evening there's a chance he will miss Kyungsoo's call.

 

 

Hours later, Minseok, Baekhyun, Sehun and Chanyeol were already standing in line to the club's entrance. The club itself is located underground, and the entrance is right by the street curve of the city's main street. So all around them there were many people outside. Pairs walking together, groups of friends who just like them, were out to have a fun night out. Out to forget about their issues and problem for a few hours and simply enjoy themselves.

It was going fairly quickly as the bouncer allowed people in one after another. Although the other three seemed fairly excited to enter, Chanyeol's mind was somewhere else.

The flickering red neon light at the entrance to the club wasn't as bothersome as they'd expected, mostly because there was enough light around them from other sources to keep their eyes fairly balanced. Although the air was unforgivingly cold, the people of the night life seemed to be invincible to the weather with their outfits.

Kyungsoo didn't call him today. It's already about an hour past the time he normally calls, and there's no sign of him at all. On top of that, like an idiot, Chanyeol had forgotten to charge his phone, and his battery isn't showing signs of lasting much longer.

"Oh my god, Chanyeol, will you stop spreading that nervous energy of yours?" Minseok placed his palm over the screen of his phone to block the view, when their eyes met, he raised an eyebrow judgementally.  
"Come on, this is your chance to free yourself from all that. Just for one night!" He explained, then pet Chanyeol's shoulder lightly.

A small sigh escaped his lips before Chanyeol set his phone to busy mode and slid it into his jacket's inner pocket. He was still worried, but as he is in this situation it'll be better to focus on it, rather than keep his head in China.

"Minseokie's right, you gotta let loose and have some fun. We'll take care of you, promise." Baekhyun smiled up at him reassuringly, then finished his sentence with a playful wink. Which was not very convincing, but Chanyeol decided that at this point he has no reason not to be convinced.

On one hand he wanted to make sure everything goes fine, since he normally isn't such a good drinker. But on the other hand, he... Didn't even care what happened to him. His emotions and worries were dedicated solely towards Kyungsoo. Right now though, he shouldn't have any emotions or worries. It's his time to be free, like Minseok said.

"Right. Okay. Let's do this." He inhaled the cold fresh air of night in his lungs, then let out a large huff, hoping that some of the negativity swimming in him will fly out with it.  
"Yeah!! Let's go!!" Baekhyun cheered after receiving his ID back from the bouncer. And then, they went in.

Down the stairs glowing in neon pink and behind the wall's corner, the club spread in front of them. It was very dark inside except for the nice amount of neon lights sparking from different locations. A large disco ball fell from the center of the ceiling, reflecting the gentle rays onto the dancing crowd filling the dance floor.

The music was loud, but good. It's been a while since Chanyeol visited such attractions. Kyungsoo and him often prefer spending time doing mundane, even cheesy activities together instead of going to this extreme. But hey, he's not here to make himself even more sad about his far away boyfriend.

All four of the club visitors headed straight to the bar. Bright blue neon light was almost blinding from the shelves behind the counter, giving the hundreds of colorful drink bottles interesting patterns and shine.

Minseok treated them to the first three rounds, going hard with strong shots from the very beginning. After him Sehun funded a bottle of beer for each as they sat on the stools and attempted to shout-chat against the music, observing the crowd to get into the vibe.

At that point Baekhyun was already hyped enough to begin his dynamic adventures. He happily hopped off his stool, with the near empty bottle in his hand, and headed straight into the dancing crowd. Disappearing somewhere in between them.  
Sehun was second to depart from the bar's wooden counter after his second beer bottle. But rather than the center, headed to a second dancing area by the wall that was way less intense. Immediately attracting that group's attention with his slick moves.

Chanyeol tried, he really did, to disconnect his consciousness from his thinking process, just for tonight. Just for the sake of stopping to care even for a while. But he's at his third beer bottle with Minseok, and he feels like crying, instead.

It took a few awful jokes from Minseok, and a bunch more good songs to play, for Chanyeol to slowly fade away. He was sure he'd fail, but at one point he sensed his mind simply shut down, or elavate, he wasn't sure. And the barricade of emotions was off.

He stepped into the dancing floor, and began grooving with the beat. Very slowly and subtly at first, only to get his body used to the motion and slowly build his way up to some more wild concepts.

Even while drunk, Chanyeol was aware of a few things. One of them was making sure that he doesn't dance too close to anyone else. Rubbing bodies together with anybody but Kyungsoo just didn't seem appealing at all. The other being that he was attracting quite a lot of attention regardless of his attempt at being subtle.

 

 

He couldn't figure out exactly how long had passed, but the next time he was aware of anything, he was nearly drenched in sweat, and had at least four different girls and guys closing in around his body. Unintentionally, it seemed. Until he locked eyes with one of the women who looked like she had very much a burning intention with her gaze up at him.

His head was spinning, the music was too loud, the lights, or rather, lack of proper lights made him feel lost. With a body hot from constant movement for who knows how long, a drink in his hand he didn't remember ordering, and the amount of people locking him in the center of the dancing mass like a strong stream of a river, he was out of it.

Oh well. He gulped down the rest of his unknown drink. No need to think right now.

The woman in front of him, the one with the blonde hair that looked like she was planning a scheme for an evil ruler, at some point rested both her hands onto his chest and got on the tip of her toes while pulling Chanyeol's head down.

He was startled by the sudden initiative, but curious to hear what she had to say as her mouth was located right beside his ear that way. Maybe she knows when Kyungsoo will be coming. He'll definitely be coming soon, right? Chanyeol's been waiting for him for so long already.

"Hey big boy~ Wanna go talk in private for a little while?" She asked, her voice was a little raspy, but it sounded like she smiled. That means she must be wishing to tell him good news. He's probably correct, Kyungsoo's arriving at any moment. His drink mind really is hopeful.

Rather than pulling back, Chanyeol turned his head slightly in order to talk back towards her ear. Trying to talk with this loud music above them was impossible. No wonder she wanted to do it privately.  
"Sure, I'love that." He said, and before even leaning back, his arm was grabbed tightly and pulled away from the dancing crowd. The woman's blonde hair was all he could see when turning to look forward at their walking direction. Did he come here with other people before? Someone tall looked familiar between all of the faces... He can't remember.

They went through a dim hallway and into a small room at the very end. As his arm was released, the door behind him closed and locked. With eyes shut due to the dizziness of moving this quickly, he could feel two hands pushing against his chest. Stepping backwards was his only possible course of action, and so he did until his legs got tackled by something, and he fell back onto what he moments later realized was a toilet seat.

The blonde hair looked very bright compared to the room's darkness and single neon lightbulb mounted on the wall. It grew bigger and bigger too, until he felt a hefty weight placed on his lap and something warm being wrapped around his shoulders.

The woman's face kept coming closer and closer to his. Everything smelled like sweet spice. That's not Kyungsoo. No. This is not something he wants at all. Weren't they supposed to be talking? Why is she getting all up over his body? He felt very uncomfortable.

"Hey, no, stop---" He grabbed one of her arms away from his shoulders while using his other hand to cover the gap between their mouths, leading to the woman's lips landing a kiss on his palm instead.  
"Ehh? Really? You looked so eager though!" She bounced off him surprised a moment later. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to push onto you like this." Was her immediate response as she bowed to him lightly and offered her hand for him to grab on and stand back up.

"Iss'alright, I thought you wanted to... Talk. You said'it." Chanyeol responded, running a hand through his hair before getting up thanks to her help. She seemed a little surprised at his words, let out a loud chuckle, then pet his shoulder lightly.  
"I mean, I did say that, I guess."  
"So what'cha say? Any news about my baby?" Chanyeol had just stood back up from the seat, but he was so dizzy, and the muffled music booming from the small bathroom's walls felt like it was ticking into his brain. So he simply allowed his body to drop down to the floor. Quite carelessly, but he succeeded sitting down without hitting anything important.

"Your baby? You have a child?" The woman watched him with amusement and curiousity, leaning down herself to remain at eye level.  
"Noooo, not child, my baby, my one and only, I love..." He pouted in response, in his own mind his words made sense, really.  
"Oooh~ A lover?" The lady grinned. "What are they like?"  
"My lover... SO CUTE!! Beautiful. Working hard..." He hiccupped. "Sexy." A smile spread across his lips as he spoke, he gently placed a hand on his chest as his heart began beating slightly faster at the thought of Kyungsoo.

"Aww, you're adorable. So deeply in love... Well, I'm glad you stopped me then. I would have felt awful if I hadn't known you have someone already." She admitted, sighing lightly at herself.  
"I should probably be more attentive to such things... Right?" She asked, looking a little sad. So Chanyeol, without knowing exactly what was going on, grabbed to her arm gently.  
"Don't be sad, love's hard, you're good, good'person." He nodded at her in an attempt to comfort. But at the same time, the hand on his chest felt something hard hiding in his jacket.

"Oh gosh. So sweet of you. I appreciate it." She laughed in response, then watched how he fumbled with his hand in his jacket before taking out his phone. He was surprised from its existence. He's so smart, how did he know he should have put it there? Amazing.

"I miss my baby a lot..." Chanyeol mumbled before another hiccup escaped his mouth. He tapped on the phone and opened the photos application. His finger landed on one of his pictures with Kyungsoo, and it displayed on the screen in full size. Then he turned it in the woman's direction with a sad expression.

"A-Ahh... Your baby is this guy?" She asked cautiously, looking at his phone's screen with interest. Chanyeol nodded.  
"He's in China... Job sent him there for sooo long. I'wanna go too!"  
"That sounds unfair. When will he return?" She sounded sympathetic, then gently took the phone off of Chanyeol's hand and placed it back in his jacket's pocket.  
"Too long! Like three'weeks!"  
"Whoa... That is indeed long."  
"Yes, and---"

 

 

Hurrendous headache woke him up the next morning.

It took him at least three whole minutes to get in touch with reality and understand that he was actually in his own bedroom. A dizzy glance around the room revealed that not only is he in bed, but he was not wearing his jacket, or shoes anymore. A large glass of water stands, and his phone is being peacefully charged on the shelf, too.

What... Happened? How did he get there? The last thing he remembers from the previous night was sulking and drinking with Minseok after Baekhyun and Sehun have already began dancing.

A vague flashback of a dim toilet flashed in his mind, and as he raised his arm to rub his face he smelled a strong scent of a sweet spice. Moreover, on his palm was a lipstick stain. A kissing mark in bright red. Huh...?

After he managed to successfully stand up and gulp down the entire glass of water, he checked himself in the mirror in near panic. Practically going naked right on spot and checking his whole body for further hints of what might have happened. There were no other lipstick marks anywhere. He sighed in relief before sitting back on the bed in his underwear, feeling pretty nasty for sleeping in his clothes that smell like dry sweat and alcohol.

The next thing popping in his head was Kyungsoo. And suddenly all of the shenanigans of Minseok, Baekhyun and Sehun convincing him to come, to drink more, to be 'free' are vivid clear again. He couldn't have a proper call with his boy last night. For some reason Kyungsoo didn't call on the usual time, and he remembers putting the device on busy mode before entering the club.

Cautiously, Chanyeol grabbed onto his phone and unlocked it, setting it out of busy mode. For some reason, a picture of Kyungsoo and himself was opened in his gallery app, as opposed to his original wallpaper, which is also a picture of Kyungsoo and himself.

As he shut the app down, he noticed the notification bar on top. Surprisingly, there was no missed calls sign there. Only the charging symbol, and the text messages one.

There were three messages there, the first one, sent last, was from Baekhyun.

[ From: Bobo who  
Hey Chanyeol, I hope you're feeling better ^^  
I'm a little bit sorry about last night TT  
The lady you met brought you to us half passed out, she said you are cute!!!  
And that she hopes "Your Baby" will come home soon. ;)  
I got you back home :D  
I mean, Sehunie carried you  
But I feel like I should have kept a better eye on you. TT  
There's hangover medicine in your fridge!! ]

Chanyeol sighed lightly and smiled to himself. Noting to himself that he'll have to call Baekhyun later and thank him for taking care of him regardless. Sehun too. It's a relief to know he hasn't done anything bad, at least.

The second message was sent by Minseok.

[ From: Minseoking  
Where'd you goooo!! ><  
I look away for one (1) second and you're gone?! TTTT  
Never mind, I got this. u.u ]

He'll never get tired of chatting with Minseok in texts. The way he types fits perfect to the image he gives off. It warmed his heart knowing that Minseok was truly there, dedicated to taking care of him regardless of possibly being slightly tipsy himself. At least Somebody kept the promise. Chanyeol rolled his eyes, thinking about Baekhyun.

The last message, sent first, came from... Kyungsoo?

[ From: Baby4life<3  
Hi Chanyeolie  
Baekhyun told me you're going to party tonight  
Don't be so worried, just have fun  
Love you <3 ]

It was sent mere minutes after Chanyeol had put his phone on busy mode last night. God... If only he would have checked his phone even once while sober he would have gotten to at least text him a little bit.

Ah... Kyungsoo.

Chanyeol allowed his back to curl down. He pressed his face against the phone's screen, shutting his eyes and hunching down in his spot. He misses him so much.

 

 

 

\-----------

Note: I will be posting the next chapter tomorrow despite the weight of the day. I would rather celebrate his memory by releasing my creation to the world, than sink into unbearable sadness.

Thank you, Jonghyun, You've worked hard. You've done well. I miss you.

 

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone are safe and strong through today. I chose to celebrate Jonghyun by keeping up with the life, with the creativity that fueled him too.  
> I don't really care if it comes off as dramatic. This is my choice, my way of keeping him alive within me.  
> It's okay to be sad, it's okay to be happy.  
> If you are struggling with dealing with the day, or struggling with feelings similar to those of Jonghyun before his passing, I offer my messages and comments. I'll do my best to be of help.  
> Thank you, Jonghyun. You've worked hard, you've done well. I miss you.
> 
> On a lighter note, this chapter contains the single instruction for this story. Hopefully it'll be worth following!

 

 

 

Another week had passed.

"What's wrong Chanyeol? You sound so sad... Actually, you sounded sad for the last few times we called, too."

Yixing's voice had a clear undertone of worry. Contrary to his usual cheerful and laid back way of talking. Their friendship is deep enough for either of them to notice even the slightest changes in each other's voices and what they mean.

"Damn, I thought I could avoid it." Chanyeol forced out a short laughter. They have only just managed to say hello to each other before Yixing pointed it out. He could hear some utensils clinking from Yixing's side of the line, and then what sounds like a healthy bite.

"Why would you avoid it?" Yixing then asked, mouth clearly filled with whatever he just chewed on.  
"Does it have to do with Kyungsoo again?" He asked with raised interest.  
"Again...? You make it sound so meaningless." Chanyeol pouted into the phone. Is he being too dramatic about it...?  
"No, no, that's not what I meant. Tell me what's wrong." Yixing quickly retaliated. The panic was so obvious in his voice. Chanyeol couldn't help but be slightly amused by just how easy it is to read Yixing's emotions. Or maybe that's just a privilege of his, reserved for a long time friend, since Yixing can do exactly the same with him.

"Sorry... I'm just really worried about Kyungsoo." Chanyeol sighed, fiddling with the thread of his hoodie.  
"He's been having such a hard time lately. There was an issue at his team's progress, and for weeks now he's stuck working nonstop every single day to catch up on where they were. He doesn't eat well... Barely sleeps... And I feel so damn useless. There's nothing I can do." Chanyeol expanded on the details, images of tired, hungry Kyungsoo sitting at the team's office and working alone in the darkness flash in his mind.  
"H-He... He cried on the call with me--- I can't..." He shut his eyes tightly and smacked his free hand over his face, rubbing all over it to push away the memories of Kyungsoo crying himself asleep, otherwise he'll begin crying too.

He was sure Yixing would have responded right away after he spoke so emotionally, so it was quite surprising to hear the silence coming from the other side of the line. No plates clanking and no chewing was heard either. Chanyeol nearly moved the phone away from his ear to check whether the conversation was still on, but Yixing spoke right in time.

"Chanyeolie, you have to stay strong, okay?" He sounded serious, deep in thought.  
"Yeah... I know. I'm trying. It just sucks that for me everything is as fine as can be, while he has to suffer all alone." Chanyeol sighed out again, wondering if these were really the only words Yixing could think of to comfort him after such a detailed reveal.

No, he needs to stop being so self absorbed. Yixing himself is in China right now. Away from his own lover living mere blocks away from Chanyeol. He knows what it's like, he knows way better.

Chanyeol should just be grateful that he was able to vent this out truthfully without being called any negative terms in return. Not that he got that from anyone, really. Only himself.

"Say," Yixing interrupted his thought process, now instead of chews, there were sounds of a keyboard ticking coming from Yixing. "What's the name of the company Kyungsoo works at?"  
Huh? Why would Yixing be interested in knowing that? He owns a whole studio himself.  
"Uh, I can text it to you if you'd like, since it's typed differently than the pronounciation." Chanyeol was puzzled, to say the least, but he doesn't doubt Yixing for a second. Never did. Never will.

Their call ended shortly after, and Chanyeol indeed sent Yixing the name of the company via a text message. It left Chanyeol in confusion, but whatever Yixing might be planning on doing, will definitely be more than anything Chanyeol possibly could.

His conversation with Kyungsoo that night was fairly short, and quite saddening. Kyungsoo mentioned how exhausted he is, and even made himself some tea so that he could relax with Chanyeol on the call, but instead he fell asleep at the moment his head fell on his pillow. And Chanyeol watched in silent worry how the steam coming up from his tea mug is slowly ceasing to float up.

 

 

And after that, there was nothing.  
For three days, Chanyeol hasn't heard anything from Kyungsoo at all.

He was losing his mind, to say the least. Bottling it all and imploding at every thought of his lover crossing his mind. It nearly reached an irreversible stage in which Chanyeol would have most likely suffered an intense collective mental breakdown, but right before things have blown out of control, hope had arrived.

It came in the form of a message from Yixing.  
Chanyeol opened his message in stressed silence, only to be more than shocked at the picture attached to it.

It was a selfie of Yixing and Kyungsoo together, Yixing smiling widely at the camera with Kyungsoo looking small and tired beside him, smiling bashfully.  
Another message arrived right after. This time, a picture of Kyungsoo from behind. He's out in the streets of China, wearing a long padded coat. Autumn is extremely close now. Chanyeol hasn't even realized it until he noticed the orange and red shades of the tree leaves in the picture.

One more message bells through. An image of Kyungsoo sitting in a restaurant's booth and focusing on slurping some noodles out of a large bowl of soup.  
Then one where Kyungsoo's making an amusing face while blowing into a tissue in his hands. Another where he's sitting on his hotel's bed cross legged and sleepily munching on what looks like a sweet snack.

Then, the last image out of the bunch arrived.  
It was another selfie, this time, of Yixing and Kyungsoo huddled in the bed together. Except Kyungsoo was fully asleep, closely tugging to Yixing's body, as Yixing's hand was placed on the back of Kyungsoo's head. Yixing's expression says all that Chanyeol needed to know.

His heart was beating faster than he was prepared to accompany, and his eyes watered up quickly as he stared at his phone's screen.

Kyungsoo is fine... Yixing travelled all the way there to spend time with him, in Chanyeol's name. The amount of gratitude he felt towards Yixing at that moment was colossal. He wiped away his gathered tears, as his cheeks were aching from how quickly they quivered between smiling and nearly crying.

Another message pinged.

[ From: LambXing  
I apologize for not telling you about these plans ahead of time.  
Kyungsoo was very happy to see me, and hugged me really tight. :)  
He misses you a lot.  
I hope this helps you a little. ^^ ]

Oh, Yixing. If only Chanyeol could properly express just how much relief and happiness this gesture had brought him. He knew if he even tried to speak right now he'd burst crying. So instead he sent Yixing a long line of hearts and crying emojis back. Receiving yet another message, this time, not from Yixing.

[ From: Bobo who  
OMG !!!!  
Did you see Yixing's pictures?!! TTT  
So cute!!! Made me cry...  
I miss Kyungsoo... Aaaaah! TT ]

Chanyeol snickered emotionally at the sentiment behind Baekhyun's messages, then smiled while tapping his response.

[ Sent message -  
I thought you have your own boyfriend to miss... <.< ]

[ From: Bobo who  
Excuse you, Kyungsoo is my boy-friend too!!  
Hahaha ^^  
We should meet up and send them the same pictures in return! >:3 ]

Chanyeol laughed to himself, and allowed his body to fall back on the couch. He shut his eyes and huffed out loudly. Exhaling all the air that got locked in his lungs from the surprise.

Kyungsoo called him that same evening, sounding tired and slightly nervous. Chanyeol however, was way too happy to allow him to remain in an unsettled state.

"Hi baby, I'm sorry I haven't called you the last---"  
"Hello my beloved!" Chanyeol cut him off cheerfully, grinning to himself as he thinks about the pictures he received in the morning again.  
"How are you feeling? I missed you. I love you. Yixing updated me, I'm so happy." He continued, hoping that his warm tone would be strong enough to pierce the distance and get Kyungsoo to calm down.

"O-Oh... Thank you. I... I am happy too." It seems to have worked. Kyungsoo spoke in a small smiling voice.  
"Yixing gave me so much food and snacks... I won't be able to finish them." He said with a larger smile, and Chanyeol chuckled lightly.  
"Are you feeling a little better?"  
"I do. I think I can hold on a little more. There's not much left."

That's everything Chanyeol needed to hear to fully come to ease. Hearing Kyungsoo say it on his own filled Chanyeol with hope. There really isn't much left of their separation anymore. This boost coming from Yixing must have really helped Kyungsoo a lot. All he could hope is that he would stick with the feeling of encouragement and energy, and properly take care of himself from now on.

Two days later, on his way, poorly underprepared and un-costumed for the Halloween party happening in Minseok's cafe, Chanyeol received an unexpected text from Kyungsoo. It was a picture of a carved pumpkin with a silly face on it, and a little 'Happy Halloween' written beneath.

He hasn't thought about it until now, but the fact that Kyungsoo decided to send him this picture was quite meaningful. Although apart, Kyungsoo still remembered just how much Chanyeol loves the parties with their friends. And without being able to join in, pitch costume ideas, or have a nice couple outfit like they've done a few years already, that's his way of showing support.

Chanyeol wondered if it made him realize the same thing, too. That from now on, from this Halloween night, there are only two weeks left until Kyungsoo's return.

From this day, he will be able to create a proper countdown schedule of the days left, instead of counting up the many days that have already passed. He definiteily felt the surge in excitement for these two weeks to end, now that there are officially, only two weeks until the nightmare is over.

 

 

Another week had passed.

Despite the large step taken towards happiness with Yixing's visitation at Kyungsoo's last week, things haven't been bright.

In fact, they've turned to be quite the opposite. But on way larger and more devastating scale.

Only two days ago Kyungsoo had sobbed so hard to Chanyeol on their call, that Chanyeol himself began crying out of sentiment. He had no idea what to do. He's so far away. He's too far away. Kyungsoo sounded and looked more miserable than he's seen him his entire life. Pale, with large and dark bags under his eyes... He looked sick, and tired, and in so much pain.

Wiping away his never ending tears from beneath the glasses, sniffing and weeping helplessly with his back against the wall of his hotel room. He was breaking right in front of Chanyeol's eyes, right in his ears, deep in his heart, and it hurt. It hurt being an observer in such a dire situation. He would have given everything away in order to pull Kyungsoo into his arms.

It was seriously heart wrenching for Chanyeol to attempt to gently persuade Kyungsoo to head over to his bed. And although it should have been a positive thing, seeing Kyungsoo fall asleep at the moment his head landed on the mattress, still in his work clothes, still with his coat, still in the uncomfortable position of simply falling onto the bed, even his glasses still on his face, was painful.

What should he do? What could he do? It's driving him insane to see the love of his life falling apart.

And yesterday, Kyungsoo hasn't even called at all.

It already happened before, so Chanyeol should probably be used to it, no?  
No. Not this time. Not after the last thing he heard come out of Kyungsoo's mouth was a silent suffering sob. Not when the last thing he had seen on Kyungsoo's face were the streaming tears wetting his sheets, his red swollen eyes shutting in exhaustion and his glasses pressing sideways against his face, surely to leave a pressure mark.

How is he supposed to stay still and have faith after seeing his boyfriend's horrible condition the previous night? He practically cleared his entire schedule for the rest of the week just so he could be available for Kyungsoo to reach at any time in case it's needed. Nobody asked him to, but he knew he wouldn't be able to properly continue on with his day when Kyungsoo's practically crumbling to pieces all alone.

The phone finally rang, pulling Chanyeol out of sinking into the mud of fears. It was Kyungsoo's unique ringtone as well. That's extremely early for him to call, Chanyeol's entire body felt heavy with negative possibilities for that reason.

He nearly leaped from the couch to reach his phone, which was resting right on the counter beside the sofa. After giving a glance at the screen just to confirm that the call is indeed coming from Kyungsoo's number, he pressed the green button and stuck it to his ear.

"Baby?" Kyungsoo's voice was airy, but burdened with a thick layer of sadness and... Emptiness.  
"Kyungsoo baby, hi, how are you? Are you alright?" Chanyeol responded immediately, his body still stuck in the stiff position of grabbing his phone, he's so on edge. A sigh was heard from the other side of the line.  
"I'm sorry... I couldn't call you yesterday. Uh..."  
"It's fine baby. What is it?" There's definiteily a hint of bad in his voice. Something must have happened.

"I just got back from the hospital... Jia told me that I passed out shortly after arriving at work." He sighed again. Chanyeol felt his heart aching. He's appalled by the fact that he isn't even surprised to hear these news.  
"They gave me three recovery rest days. So I'm back at the hotel now. Good thing there's lots of food left from Yixing's visit... Right?" Kyungsoo definitiely was trying to smile, but it was obvious on his voice that it'll be impossible for him to successfully feel any sort of positive emotion at a time like this. Except from relief, maybe.

"Oh, baby..." Passing out at an unknown environment... Being brought to an unknown hospital where he isn't able to understand anything... That experience must have been so nervewrecking. How is he supposed to rest for three days with the stress of his work's responsibility on his shoulders? Let alone the amount of guilt he must be feeling for leaving his team members on their own.

Chanyeol can't stand it anymore. He's had enough of Kyungsoo destroying himself. Sure, it might be partially his fault for giving way above and beyond what was required of him, but his boss knew that he's that typed of person. That'd give himself up for the sake of the greater good's success.

Ugh. Anger started boiling up in the depth of Chanyeol's stomach. He felt like throwing up, or like breaking a wall down with a punch, or both.

He's had enough. The precious love of his life has had enough.

"Kyungsoo baby, you're still in the same hotel you've been to from the beginning, right?" Chanyeol changed his demeanor. No more sadness. No more of this stupid endurance test. This isn't fair, and if he can't do anything about it, he will change reality itself to make sure there will be something he could do.  
"Y-Yeah." Kyungsoo sounded quite surprised from the sharp and serious response to his reveal of condition.  
"Go to sleep for now, drink a lot of water... And please eat something. There's something I have to do, I will update you soon enough. Alright my love?" Chanyeol grabbed onto his laptop that was resting peacefully on the coffee table in front him and opened it up with his free hand.

"Is everything alright?" Kyungsoo asked, his voice soft, caring, honest.  
Chanyeol's eyes shut. He wanted to sigh, he wanted to squeeze Kyungsoo in his arms. How can he possibly this selfless, worrying about Chanyeol's condition simply because his tone of voice changed, while he's the one who was literally brought to the hospital mere hours ago.

"I love you baby. Everything is fine, I promise." He had to put effort into easing down his voice a little bit, just so that he'll be able to reassure Kyungsoo that he could fully relax and get the proper rest he needs, and frankly, deserves.  
"Okay. I love you, Chanyeolie. I will go rest now."  
"Good, sweet dreams." Chanyeol puckered his lips and made a kissing sound for Kyungsoo to hear. The half hidden chuckle he received in return was the affirmation that it had been received.  
"Bye bye~"  
The call ended.

But Chanyeol was far from going to rest just yet.

He waited at least ten hours after the end of the call to update Kyungsoo about the news. Just to make sure Kyungsoo have gotten the full recommended amount of sleeping hours. He huffed out some tight air from his lungs while tapping his fingers on the screen of his phone.

[ Message sent:  
I will be coming over to you tomorrow at 8pm your time.  
Yixing helped me book the flights.  
Rest well until then, okay?  
See you soon, my love. <3 ]

[ From: Baby4life<3  
TT  
I love you... TTTT <3 ]

 

 

Chanyeol packed quickly when his ticketing process was finished thanks to Yixing's connections. Even if it would have taken Kyungsoo a little over a week to return home himself, Chanyeol simply couldn't take waiting any longer. Not with all the risks waiting even longer involve.

It'll be a stay lasting only a little over a day, so he didn't even need to pack that much to begin with. Not more than his pajamas and a single switch of spare clothes. More than anything for himself, he filled his bag with things destined to stay with Kyungsoo until his own arrival back to Korea.

A bunch of healthy nutritious snack bars, some candy that he knows Kyungsoo likes, and a pair of gloves Kyungsoo mentioned he was too lazy to purchase alone.

Baekhyun was kind enough, upon realizing just how serious the situation is, to not tease Chanyeol about anything while driving him to the airport. Chanyeol's entire body was pulsing lightly with subtle anticipation. He thanked Baekhyun sincerely for the lift and hurried inside, passing through the examination stops quickly.

(( Author's note: This next part of the story is best experienced while listening to EXO - Oasis ))

He didn't even realize his foot was tapping restlessly on the ground while sitting and waiting for his flight to get to the boarding stage. Everything around him was fairly peaceful compared to his ever spreading and intensifying aura of stress.

Although he knew he was on his way to Kyungsoo, it felt like a clock was ticking backwards in his head the entire time. Slowly. Steady. Counting down to the moment he will be together with his lover again. It was supposed to be filled with excitement and happiness, but for some reason, he couldn't get out of the state of mind where he felt he was running out of time. Time for what? He didn't know. But there was less and less of it with every passing second.

Surprisingly, he slept through the entire flight. Chanyeol expected himself to fail at blinking, let alone shutting his eyes for longer than that. He was very glad he managed to pull it off though, because it felt like time was skipped forward. Even if just a little bit.

As Chanyeol unbuckled his belt in order to get out of his seat, one of the flight attendants hurried to him and explained in english that they aren't allowed to disembark yet, due to security issues inside the airport itself. He couldn't do anything but nod to sign he understood, and wait some more. The old chinese lady sitting beside him made him jealous. Still sleeping uninterrupted.

So they've waited an hour. And then another one. It's already ten. Two hours after the time he had told Kyungsoo he'd be arriving at. And Chanyeol's eyes have been shaking in their sockets to the rhythm of his wrist watch's hand cicrling repeatedly. He doesn't know how to get service on his phone when everything's written in chinese.

He has to tell Kyungsoo he'll be late. Or rather, he just needs to see him, be there already.

After finally being freed out of the plane and stepping outside, Chanyeol realized how much colder it already is in China compared to Korea, and it made him feel slightly more worried about Kyungsoo's general condition.

He hurried through the airport, his bag by his arm is as heavy as his soul felt at the thought of Kyungsoo sitting and waiting for him all these extra hours. At least grabbing a taxi was fine. All he needed to do was show the driver the map with the location he marked, right?

Chanyeol felt a rush run through his body. He needs to see Kyungsoo. He has to.

He knows better than anyone that Kyungsoo is probably even more desperate than him for that same wish.

Although Chanyeol was convined he had shown the driver the correct address, for some reason, he was let off the taxi at the edge of the street. It was pointless to try and understand the driver's reasoning behind that unexpected drop off, but he'll take it. He has to.

Stepping out of the vehicle was another reminder of just how unforgivingly cold and crisp the air is right now. After wrapping his bag over his shoulder and behind his back, he began striding into the long street. Empty of all human souls and almost of all cars. Just a little bit more, and he'll be there.

That's it. He's going to finally see Kyungsoo again. After nearly whole two months apart. His heart, body, and mind, were scattered over all the silly events that happened during that period of time. His steps grew increasingly faster as he walked.

Everything felt like it was going in double speed. His heart was beating fast inside his chest, muffling the sound of cold silence and far away car engines that echo through this long street between the tall buildings. The night was dark, and for a road that's located in the middle of an industrial area, there's barely a line of vision to follow.

Every streetlight he passes under was so damn bright over the black and cold night's sky above him. And his face was freezing from the wind created by the speed he walked in. Despite that, his body was burning. The embodiment of a flame. All of the bottled anticipation was starting to crack him at the seams.

He found himself practically running when he noticed a figure standing under one of the streetlights further on. It took him a little while to realize it was an actual person and not a cone, because they were wearing a large padded jacket with the hood up over their head.

Could it be...?

Chanyeol nearly choked on his breath when he recognized the familiar circular rim of glasses reflecting the little bit of light.

Kyungsoo... Kyungsoo... Kyungsoo.

He got close to the person faster than he realized he was speeding at. Kyungsoo barely got to turn and look up at his direction before Chanyeol swiped him into the tightest hug he'd ever given in his life. He heard a small whimper of surprise escaping his lover's mouth. With head practically located behind his due to how tight the hug was, he couldn't say a word, only huff out after the extensive jog he'd made through the long street.

Steam kept appearing in front of his mouth every time he exhaled.

Kyungsoo is there. He's finally there.

In slow movement, Chanyeol wrapped around his entire body, and slid his hand up, removing the coat's hood, just so that he could place his palm on the back of his lover's head and feel him. Like he always does.

Then, he felt it. And he knew he made the right choice. Kyungsoo's body was finally untensing, relaxing. Finally accepting. Finally allowing... Finally... Alive.

At this moment, not the cold, not the snow starting to lightly drift down from the sky, not the cars, not the streetlights, not anything at all around them exists anymore. There's only Kyungsoo in his arms. There's only Kyungsoo slowly, and shakingly, tightening his own arms around Chanyeol's body, too.

It was quiet for some time. Other than Chanyeol's slowly calming down breathing pattern. Minutes of the two of them just, existing within each other. Just living.

Chanyeol felt Kyungsoo's body jerking a little bit, as if he had finally returned back to reality. He inhaled to speak, and attempted to move away. But before he could raise his head to say anything at all, Chanyeol buried his face down into his neck, right next to his ear.

"I missed you, Kyungsoo." He let out in a voice so low and deep, it sounded like a needy whisper. And actually, it really was a needy whisper. But he knew it was enough, because Kyungsoo'd body was paralyzed for a moment yet again. Chanyeol pecked his lips against the skin of the man he loves most in the world, then pulled his head back a little.

Enough to catch a glimpse of the way Kyungsoo's lips were quivering. Just right for him to notice the shade of deep pink steaming under Kyungsoo's shiny cheeks. He's beautiful. He's so, so precious.

"I missed you." Chanyeol repeated, leaning back to his ear and starting to place whole rows of kisses across Kyungsoo's neck, exhaling warmly against his skin but also sniffing in every bit of his existence that his nose can catch.  
With their bodies locked in a tight embrace, Chanyeol continues to kiss, and lick, and brush his lips over his boyfriend's exposed bit of skin.

"I love you." He said once, and then twice, deeply, soulfully, the voice ran right through Kyungsoo's ear and down to the core of his body. Chanyeol could feel and notice how Kyungsoo was practically coming undone in his hold, every bone, every muscle, every cell in his body were screaming for Chanyeol's attention. For the hold, for the touch. And he'd be more than glad to give it all to him.

Just like that, tied and glued to one another, Chanyeol's heart was finally pouring out all of the stress he's been bottling. All of his fears, worries, all of the loneliness, regarding just how much he really needs Kyungsoo with him. All of it came out in the form of quick, pressed kisses and repeating whispers that made Kyungsoo's knees shake.

It took quite a while until the two of them finally raised their heads away from each other. Chanyeol looked at Kyungsoo's face in awe, like the very first time he's seeing him once again. Cheeks pink, soft, his glasses were a little foggy, but his eyes were shining so brightly that he could still see the sparkles from beneath them.

His heart finally unclogged. He's there. Kyungsoo's finally there.

Another wave of love for his boyfriend flamed all over his body, there was no need for an explanation, the happiness filling his every limb and nerve were like a bomb of energy dropped right at his body's core. So he cupped Kyungsoo's face with his hands, that while holding his lover's face like that, looked so big. He forgot just how small and fragile Kyungsoo always feels to him when they're together.

"Have you been waiting out here for me the entire time?" He asked gently, realizing just how cold his face actually is. Could it be that Kyungsoo was waiting here all these hours Chanyeol was being delayed due to airport complications?  
"Yeah." He replied, voice soft and airy. Chanyeol's heart clenched at the realization that Kyungsoo must have been standing there all alone ever since eight in the evening, just waiting. Anticipating the moment Chanyeol would finally come for him.

"I am sorry it took me this long." He said sincerely, stroking his thumbs lightly over Kyungsoo's cheeks and allowing his eyes to run over his lover's entire face with admiration. Everything about him is perfect.

"Chanyeolie, can you kiss me?" Kyungsoo's voice let out, his hand already tugging to the large padded sleeve of Chanyeol's coat. There was a burst of stars exploding in his heart before Chanyeol leaned in.

It was just a soft peck. But then came another. And another one. And three, five, eight, eleven, a hundred more tiny little kisses. Their lips slowly started warming up now. Their bodies naturally fell into one another, as if seeking more.

Eventually Kyungsoo had to pause them, breathing warmly, with glazed eyes and red cheeks. His glasses were slightly tilted sideways, too. He looked so shy... So adorable... So, so beautiful. Chanyeol loves him so much. His treasure, his light, his sun and moon, his strength, his happiness, his---

"L-Let's get in first..." Kyungsoo mumbled softly, grabbing onto Chanyeol's hand tightly with his own, and pulling them both up the stairs and into the hotel. They hadn't let go of their hands even once. Up the elevator to the correct floor, and into the room once Kyungsoo unlocked it with his keycard.

Only then, once the door was closed behind them, their hands were freed. Chanyeol dropped his bag by the door, and they both took their large coats and shoes off. It was dark. And a little cold. But still way warmer than the freezing wind and snow from outside. Neither of them could bring themselves to turn the lights on, they weren't able to break eye contact with one another even when hanging their coats. Just stood there and stared.

Then without saying a word, they both, like on cue, wrapped around one another again. But this time, way more passionately. Deeply, hungrily, desperately. They kissed wildly, their mouths sucking each other in, barely breathing in between connecting as much as they could.

Both of Chanyeol's hands drew right down to his boyfriend's ass. He grabbed onto it tightly, pressing his lover's body against his while pushing him against the hotel room's wall. Kyungsoo seems to have the same idea about their plans, as he wrapped both arms around Chanyeol's shoulders, and both legs around his waist. Hanging onto him like a koala bear.

While pushed against the wall, their crotches brushed together, and Kyungsoo unhinged his arms free, only to begin undressing Chanyeol's upper body. He quickly slid his hand underneath both his sweater and shirt, trailing cold fingers over Chanyeol's hard abs and defined muscles. It sent pleasant tingles of awareness to Chanyeol's brain, as he leaned back slightly, reluctantly breaking the kiss so Kyungsoo could pull it all off at once.

They got back into the kiss right after, and Kyungsoo was now the one to wrap around Chanyeol tightly again. His lips were far from cold now, in fact, they were plump and swollen and pink with the wetness of their flavors exchanged and the constant sucking and licking they're engaging in.

A short yet deep glance into Kyungsoo's glazed eyes was all Chanyeol needed before entering the hotel's bedroom and allowing the both of them to drop on the bed, his hips thrusting against Kyungsoo's crotch from the impact on the mattress yet again.

They were huffing lightly and staring at each other, heat growing between them. Both physically, and with feelings.

 

 

"You're here..." Kyungsoo broke their lustful silence with a sentimental tone, softly stroking his hand all the way from Chanyeol's stomach to his jaw, then rubbing his thumb over Chanyeol's cheek gently.  
"Chanyeolie... I love you." He continued, softly, with his heart. And Chanyeol felt like he wanted to cry from happiness, so instead he nuzzled his head against the touch.  
"I am here." He hummed in return, planting a small kiss on Kyungsoo's lips, before sliding his own hands underneath his garments and undressing his upper body with his cooperation. Stroking Kyungsoo's stomach, chest, and nipples, feeling his skin.

To undo all the rest, the two of them parted fully. Kyungsoo was the first to remain in underwear, so he helped Chanyeol pull his own jeans off once he was done. Before Chanyeol could get any closer again, Kyungsoo didn't waste a moment, and began stroking his hand over Chanyeol's length from on top of the underwear's fabric.  
Still on his knees, Chanyeol huffed out and stared down at his lover's face advancing closer and closer towards his subject of interest.

"Baby, are you sure?" He asked, stroking the back of Kyungsoo's head located right in front of his crotch. He was worried that Kyungsoo's body might not be in the right condition.  
"Yeah. I slept for the paste two days. I can do it." Kyungsoo answered breathlessly as he pulled down Chanyeol's last layer of clothing and shoved as much of his dick as possible into his mouth immediately. Luscious lips creating a heated wet pocket for Chanyeol to grow.  
"Fuck--- I don't want it to seem shallow, because I missed you so much for real, but holy shit, I missed this, too." Chanyeol admitted right after, stroking over Kyungsoo's bobbing head while his dick's getting harder and more erect by the second.

It's not like Chanyeol hasn't touched himself while Kyungsoo was gone, but nothing can compare to the real thing. To the real Kyungsoo slobbering over his dick like it's a popsicle in midsummer's heat.  
"You like it that much? Did you miss it? My dick?" Chanyeol's eyes went narrow as he entered a higher level of arousal from Kyungsoo's eager consumption of his own skin and flesh. But he came here with a clear mind, and his priority was to make Kyungsoo feel good.

He knew he'd be receiving just as much of a warm welcome as he planned to give, but that only means he'll have to step up his game.  
"Mmhh--- Yeah, I want it all..." Kyungsoo mumbled before shoving Chanyeol's wet and dripping member back in his mouth for one last sucking session. Once that was done, he finally let it away from his lips. But thick strings of saliva and Chanyeol's own precum were still hanging between his mouth and the entire length like a veil of syrup.  
"Ooh, nasty." He whispered.

Chanyeol gulped wetly at the sight, before refilling his lungs and grabbing onto Kyungsoo's face again, kissing him deeply, with all the fluids, with all of everything that could have remained. He then opened his eyes and stared right into Kyungsoo's definitively.

He wants to make Kyungsoo feel like a god. He wants to show Kyungsoo just how much of a tight worshipper he is. He wants to make him feel so good, so loved, so important and precious, just like he truly is. He wants to remind himself exactly how each patch of skin on Kyungsoo's body feels like.

"I'm hungry, give me your ass." Chanyeol said with all seriouesness, and watched Kyungsoo's face change from a surprise into shyness and into lust in the span of two seconds.

He easily stepped off the bed and waited for Kyungsoo to turn over on the bed before yanking his ankles back to the edge, surprising Kyungsoo, apparently, because he heard a small gasp.  
"You're that hungry...?" Kyungsoo mumbled, turning his head to look back at Chanyeol, while raising his ass high in the air, knees holding it up on the mattress.  
"Imma eat you up." Chanyeol announced in a low growl. He licked his lips and grabbed onto Kyungsoo's perfect, juicy, plump and round ass. After spreading his buttcheeks apart, Chanyeol stared for a few moments, then dove right into his meal.

Eating ass, when it comes to Chanyeol, never concludes with simply eating, however. Indeed, he slobbered all over Kyungsoo's hole hungrily, and slipped his tongue in to transfer his saliva over however far in he could reach. Kyungsoo's soft exhales and adorable little moans were so encouraging.

But he knew it wasn't enough. Not when they've been holding back for nearly two months. So without much of a warning, he shoved both his index finger and middle finger fully into Kyungsoo's hole, feeling it gape around them in surprise. Kyungsoo gasped, but once Chanyeol's tongue joined the party once again, he hummed out in pleasure.

Eventually, Chanyeol left Kyungsoo's ass dripping with as much lubrication as his own dick received. Of course, he did not forget to give Kyungsoo's dick some treatment as well. He ran his tongue all the way from the tip, down to the base, over his balls, and right back to his ass again. Then finished the job by dragging licks and kisses up and over Kyungsoo's spine to the back of his neck, and nipped there a few times to the sound of Kyungsoo's hot yet soft exhales.

It felt so intimate, so close, so honest. Chanyeol's body was resting against Kyungsoo's back, and while one arm held his body up against the mattress, he used the other to gently stroke Kyungsoo's lips, whiel with the motion of his hips, he was sliding his dick between Kyungsoo's wet asscheeks slowly.

"I love you. I want to make you feel good... And loved... I'll do anything you want." Chanyeol hummed deeply, planting soft kisses over Kyungsoo's head and ears, while his finger was already being licked and sucked into his boyfriend's mouth. The shine of lust in the way Kyungsoo looked up at him, face half buried in the mattress, made him shudder with further arousal.

"Mmh... Then get in there." Kyungsoo replied, then bit onto Chanyeol's finger a little hard before sliding his tongue over it. Causing Chanyeol to twitch lightly as his temperature rises.  
"You're so damn sexy. Shit." Chanyeol huffed out and leaned down lower, capturing Kyungsoo's lips into his own, while his hands gripped onto his boyfriend's raised ass to prepare for the entrance.

"Go, go, be in me already---..." Kyungsoo huffed into the kiss, raising his hips higher and causing Chanyeol's dick to bounce right against his hole. There's no time for a condom for this. Not when they're this deep, this hot. It'll be fine, they're both clean. They're going raw.

"Fuuuh---uuuchk---" Chanyeol cussed, sliding his tip in, easily followed by the head, and by the rest of it until halfway through. Kyungsoo's ass simply sucked him in, all wet and hot and ready. He heard Kyungsoo sigh out in what sounds like both relief and joy.

"You're so big baby... Ahh." Kyungsoo spoke again when Chanyeol pushed his lubricated length deeper in. Feeling Kyungsoo's insides giving him an opening, yet squeezing against him to provide the perfect comfort.

Heat was rising at the core of his body, and on his cheeks, as he began moving slowly in and out of his lover. Not forgetting to continuously lick, kiss, and suckle on whichever piece of Kyungsoo's skin comes in contact with his mouth.

"So good. So tight, so hot Kyungsoo... Holy shit..." He exhaled deeply, feeling the way Kyungsoo's body shivered at the senstation of his low voice vibrating against the back of his neck. His neck was so sensitive, such a wonderful trait of Kyungsoo that Chanyeol never forgets. He moaned out softly against the mattress and shut his eyes.

Chanyeol planned to go very slowly, and express his admiration and love to Kyungsoo in the form of allowing him to unfold a little bit at a time. But Kyungsoo was already huffing hotly and pushing back his own ass in order to get Chanyeol to work.

Not only that, but it seemed that whatever dildo Kyungsoo had brought with him was clearly not sized big enough to resemble Chanyeol's actual package. He felt tight, and a little tense. These two months apart really have put Kyungsoo's body out of his sexual loop, and if not by the physical state of his ass, Chanyeol would have known because of the hunger for more that sparks in his eyes.

Hunger for the real thing. A craving that never truly leaves.

"Babe, should I go hard? Should I go full way?" Chanyeol asked lowly against Kyungsoo's ear, carefully watching his facial expression change with each slow thrust he pushes into the wet caves of his body. He noticed Kyungsoo biting onto his lip, and expected some spicy words afterwards.

But instead, he felt Kyungsoo's hand smack over Chanyeol's own ass and grip tightly, pulling him in to close the slight distance between them. He blinked surprised, a surge of arousal shot straight to his penis, which resulted in Kyungsoo releasing a soft moan before making eye contact with him, only with the eye that's not buried in the mattress.

"I want to forget these two months even happened." He huffed, squeezing Chanyeol's ass once more, before releasing and grabbing onto the bed sheets.  
Chanyeol hummed warmly, and planted a kiss on Kyungsoo's cheek. He then rose up, and placed both of his hands tightly on Kyungsoo's hips in a strong grip.

"I'll fuck you so fucking good, baby." He announced with confidence.

Without another word, he thrusted into Kyungsoo while pulling his ass backwards at the same time, causing his entire length to get pushed down into the depths of his body. He basked in the gasp and the moan that echoed in the room, taking it as a prize for his achievement, before pumping himself inside again.

Kyungsoo's walls spreaded and slimmed with each thrust. Chanyeol didn't go too fast, but definitely pushed the boundaries on what counts as hard, as with each push he pulled and with each cry of pleasure coming from Kyungsoo he was only getting more eager to fill him up to the fullest.

He fucked him hard, mercilessly almost, and Kyungsoo let his voice out without any restrictions. His back was arching, his hands clawing at the sheets so tight, his skin started dewing with sweat and his knees were barely needed anymore. His weight wasn't even on the bed at all as Chanyeol was practically holding his hips up to fuck into him.

The sound of wet friction with each thrust, combined with the sticky slaps of Chanyeol's balls on his skin, and both Kyungsoo's and Chanyeol's own moans, were making him feel slightly lightheaded. It was overwhelming. It was so hot, so captivating. He was losing his mind to the sensations while his body kept going on its own and pound Kyungsoo in the air.

"C-Chan--- Yeolie... Owaahh, mmh---" He heard his name being called, which pulled him back to reality a little. Kyungsoo was trying to turn around and roll over, it seems.

The both of them were breathing heavily as Chanyeol gently allowed Kyungsoo's body off his grip.  
"Come here, I want to see you... When you fuck me so good..." Kyungsoo said in between his breathless huffs, and Chanyeol's body shuddered with joy at how needy Kyungsoo was being towards him. Though at this point, he was being just as needy himself.  
"Of course, baby. You better watch closely." Chanyeol smiled, sweat rolling down his back.

He lowered down and helped Kyungsoo roll over without pulling out. So that now Kyungsoo's lying on his back on the bed, and Chanyeol's on his knees, holding onto Kyungsoo's thighs and spreading him apart while staring down at him lustfully.

They both caught up on some air, before Chanyeol tilted his head to the side and planted kisses in the area of his lover's knees.  
"You're so hot... Fuck." Kyungsoo said, enjoying his view of Chanyeol's body while jerking himself with his hand. Chanyeol was caught off guard, and groaned out lightly when he noticed Kyungsoo playing with himself simply because he finds Chanyeol that attractive. What a massive ego boost.

"Fucking sexy, baby, yeah... Jerk it." Chanyeol encouraged, then adjusted his position lightly before starting to pound into Kyungsoo once again. This time, being able to see the way his mouth opens, the way his back curved his entire body to the sensation, the way he eagerly jerks himself off while getting fucked... All of these made everything twice as heated as Chanyeol thought they were before.

Kyungsoo was so loud. So damn loud and passionate about having his voice heard. He kept moaning, crying, groaning, whining and most importantly, repeating Chanyeol's name over and over again. Penetrating his ears and having these melted tones be carved onto Chanyeol's memory. Shooting him praises from here to the moon about how good he feels, how big he is, how hot, how strong, how sexy, how he feels like he's melting... Kyungsoo's really pulling out all of Chanyeol's favourite cards.

They kept it going for almost two whole hours, where Chanyeol fought off his own edge as long as possible each round, in order to make sure it continues for a long time. But now they're at the point where he knows holding back any longer will become torture.

Kyungsoo's entire body was loose like a wet noodle. It's like his body didn't even contain bones anymore.

His stomach and chest were covered in layers of sprayed semen he had released three times through this intercourse. His eyes were nearly shut, wet, and shining from the tears that gathered in them with each time he climbed up to paradise and released, but Chanyeol's dick wouldn't let him free of the orgasmic high. He was stuck in a state of near-orgasm for the past hour and a half, so each movement triggers that mechanism again.

He could barely breathe at all if it didn't come with a moan, his legs were so wide apart, shaking, held tightly in Chanyeol's large hands by the thighs, and he was twitching and arching whenever Chanyeol pushed back inside.

Chanyeol's own dick was burning. Kyungsoo's ass was already filled, and dripping with large portions of semen Chanyeol had had ejaculated inside of him, which helped reduce the friction to the point where going into Kyungsoo felt like a slippery slide. More liquid was pouring out with the pull than was poured in the push.

He was moving in and out slowly, sliding over every curve, every turn, every fold of Kyungsoo from the inside with the squishy sound of the sticky liquids filling in the gaps. His face was red, his breathing pattern was heavy and fast. When looking down at Kyungsoo's stomach, he could see exactly where the tip of his hard dick was located, since it created a little bump that swirled around from inside his belly with each slide.

"Chanyeolie... Come... Come already..." Kyungsoo mumbled airily, pressing his own fingers on top of the bump that Chanyeol's dick raises. Chanyeol winced, his dick was overly sensitive after constantly fucking into Kyungsoo for this long.

"Was it good, Kyungsoo?" He asked, sliding his dick out almost to the tip. He looked down and noticed just how hot, red, and abused Kyungsoo's hole and whole ass looked. Hell, Chanyeol's own crotch was red from slapping against Kyungsoo's body this many times.

"Too good---... Fuck... I feel like I've gone insane..." Kyungsoo replied, raising his arm to cover his eyes, before moaning out lightly once more as Chanyeol slid back inside slowly, but deeply.

"I love you baby. I love you so much. I belong to you..." Chanyeol hummed, carefully leaning his upper body down and folding Kyungsoo's legs backwards, against the mattress beside his head, just so he could kiss him softly.

Kyungsoo huffed out and shut his eyes, kissing back. It seems he kept his flexibility in tact... Maybe he practiced yoga in China to replace his pilates. He was barely bothered by having his body positioned like that.

"You did so good Chanyeolie... I'm so glad that you're here... I missed you so much. I wanted to see you, and feel you..." Kyungsoo spoke softly and began planting soft kisses all over Chanyeol's face. His voice slightly weakened due to his position, and the fact that Chanyeol's still very slowly sliding in and out of him. Wanting to reach his final release before sealing the deal.

"Chanyeolie... Fill me." Kyungsoo mumbled airily right against Chanyeol's ear, and proceeded to lick over it, then nip onto his earlobe. A pulse of electricity ran straight from that spot and down to Chanyeol's dick.

His body's first reaction was to release his very last spray of the day, adding some more heated semen into the stew of three ejaculations already cooking and dripping from Kyungsoo's ass. Both he and Kyungsoo shut their eyes tightly and groaned the last bits of pleasure out into the air, before Chanyeol pulled back, and once and for all, for this night, pulled his drenched dick outside of Kyungsoo's hole.

It almost sounded like a vaccuum, or like a bubble just popped when it finally dropped out. Right after it, a thick, sticky stream of Chanyeol's cum began pouring out. Kyungsoo exhaled lengthily, then shut his legs together, and barely rolled to lay on his side. The river still flowing down and creating a little white lake on the sheets.

Chanyeol bit his lip with a hint of guilt. Wondering if maybe he had gone a little bit too far with just how intensely he just drilled Kyungsoo apart for four rounds in a row. But Kyungsoo's expression was nothing but peace and satisfaction, looking over at Chanyeol with eyes half shut.

"You own my heart." Chanyeol said gently, a smile growing on his lips. Then he kissed Kyungsoo's thigh, continued up to the hip, to the waist, to the elbow, shoulder, and neck, before allowing himself to fall sideways and face Kyungsoo from the front.

"How does it feel?" He asked gently, pulling himself closer. Then very carefully, and affectionately, wrapped his arms around Kyungsoo's naked body, and began massaging his lower back, knowing that this area of his body might be a little unpleasant once the high of their incredible sex will end.

"It... It feels good to be home." Kyungsoo concluded shortly, closing his eyes and leaning his face closer to Chanyeol's, so that his forehead would be attached to Chanyeol's lips. Actively making himself receive a kiss that way. He also very lightly pressed his palm against Chanyeol's chest, where his heart is beating in bliss.

Chanyeol's spirit and body lit up, hearing Kyungsoo say this to him... While they're in China, so far away from home... He had just realized yet again, for the billionth time in the past eight years, that there is nothing in this entire realm of existence that matters to him more than Kyungsoo.

All this time Chanyeol was struggling with having Kyungsoo away, but Kyungsoo was struggling just as much, if not more, about being forced to stay so far away, all alone... Chanyeol was sad when Kyungsoo's scent started to fade, but their entire apartment is filled with it. While Kyungsoo's heart all the way out here must have shattered a hundred times more, a hundred times harder, once Chanyeol's single shirt had lost his fragrance.

Chanyeol's been so stuck in his own pain for the majority of the time, and only now, after hearing this one sentence, he finally felt exactly just how deeply and truly loved he is.

At this point, Chanyeol knew that when he dies, he wouldn't reach heaven. Because heaven is right there, heaven is lying right between his arms and breathing. Heaven is feeling his heart beat through his chest.

Heaven is Kyungsoo.

It was over, and between his slowly calming breaths, Chanyeol felt like he was going to pass out. There are, however, better things to do. As Kyungsoo was shakingly waddling to the bathroom, with Chanyeol closely behind, he didn't forget to call in the room service so that their very visibly used bed will be cleaned for the night.

They both entered the shower together, it was the perfect temeprature for both their bodies to ease down. In slow motions and immense affection, the two of them were soaping each other up. Chanyeol wanted to trail his hands all over Kyungsoo's body, and it felt incredibly heart warming to see that Kyungsoo was doing the same.

There wasn't even a hint of sexual context behind these touches. Just the pure feeling of having their skins connect was the goal they wanted to achieve. Only after they were both thoroughly cleaned from inside and out, Chanyeol placed his hands onto Kyungsoo's cheeks and began kissing him once again.

Their bodies pulled together to one another by instinct. Slippery skin stuck in a warm hold. While lazily making out with Kyungsoo under the shower's stream, Chanyeol could hear the cleaning staff do their job in the bedroom.

And after that was done, and they were back in bed, they lied down and simply spoke to one another. Kyungsoo's soft, tired, and airy voice was like an angel's harp in his ears. It felt warm, and tasted sweet, like molten hot chocolate dripping on his mind and soul. He was being healed.

Kyungsoo spoke about his different experiences here in China. He talked about his work for a little and explained the situation better. Then he spoke about Yixing's visit, and about the hospital... He only started drifting off to sleep after the subject of food was brought up.

Chanyeol was enamored and mesmerized by the sight of Kyungsoo trying to battle his own exhaustion, this time. Because he looked happy. He was calm. He was glowing. It was pure. He was watching something that only angels are allowed to be exposed to.

Once his lover's eyes shut down, Chanyeol cradled Kyungsoo into his hold, planning to keep him close for the night, while repeatedly kissing his head and face. For almost half an hour Chanyeol simply whispered sweet nothings between the kisses. About love, and happiness, and how thankful he is to have him in his life.

He's there. He's finally there. They are both there. Together.

Kyungsoo opened his eyes a little after Chanyeol was sure he was already asleep, just to smile up at him. A single tear drop rolled over his cheek once he shut his eyes again. As happy as Chanyeol thinks he is, Kyungsoo must be on a whole other layer of bliss.

Chanyeol's heart thumped a little louder as he kissed the tear away and watched Kyungso's face fall into full slumber. He looked like a soft baby against Chanyeol's large arms. The amount of relief he felt was greater than ever before.

His beloved boyfriend was having a hell of a hard time. And it's not over yet. But nothing could stay in their way now. Not anymore.

The next morning Chanyeol woke up to an empty bed. He was slightly disoriented and confused regarding to where he was and what he was doing for a split second, but the soreness of his muscles from last night's endeavors was quite a thick reminder.

As he left the hotel's bedroom, he found Kyungsoo sitting on the little living space's couch, wearing nothing but his underwear and Chanyeol's very own sweater, and sipping on a mug of coffee. The heater was on, and in front of him stood the wall height window towards the street.

Seeing the back of Kyungsoo's head like that, against the bright white of the snow covered street from the window, was almost ethereal. Chanyeol felt like he accidentally woke up to be living inside a different dimension.

"You like it?" He asked instead, rememebering that reality with Kyungsoo can easily surpass any dream.  
Kyungsoo turned his head sideways, enough to have Chanyeol in his field of view. He smiled, still in an aura of sleep.  
"Yeah. I wanted to wear it." he replied, running his own hand over his chest to brush the fabric of Chanyeol's sweater.

Chanyeol grinned to himself, and poured the hot coffee from the machine into a mug of his own. Calmly sitting down right beside Kyungsoo, and allowing him to lean against his bare chest between their shared sips.

The two of them just stared out at the falling snow in silence.

Chanyeol knew that this is not home, and yet, it felt like it. He finally understood why Kyungsoo said that same thing last night. He felt at home. This, the feeling, is home. Home is where the heart is... And his heart is right there, nuzzling against his body sleepily, and sipping on coffee. His home was then wrapped by his arm, and sighed out contently.

"Good morning." Chanyeol said.  
"Morning, love." Kyungsoo replied.

 

 

 


	5. Chapter 5

 

 

 

They spent the single day Chanyeol had in China doing absolutely nothing. But they spent it doing nothing, together. At some point in the day, they brought over all the blankets from the bedroom, and huddled on the couch like a fortress of clouds in front of the television screen playing some chinese dramas.

There was a lot more talking, a lot more giggling and teasing.

Chanyeol had shown Kyungsoo a bunch of pictures, videos, and other news that have been happening with their group of friends back in Korea. And after a particularly amusing video that Chanyeol filmed, of Sehun and Jongin being a pair of idiots and losing against Minseok's cat in a game, Kyungsoo surprised him by kissing his jaw with a smile.

A rush of love ran over him and filled his heart to the fullest, as he squeezed Kyungsoo tighter into his arms with affection, murmuring little compliments while pecking his head. It was a match beyond this world. Kyungsoo always have, and always will, fit into his arms like they were meant to exist for each other.

He'd always bundle up agaisnt Chanyeol's body, especially with this many warm comfortable blankets around, like liquids shape to fit their containers.

"I missed this. I missed hearing your heart beat like this." Kyungsoo then hummed out softly, resting his head, specifically his ear, against Chanyeol's chest.

Chanyeol's eyes watered up from just how many emotions had flooded his heart from hearing this. Without saying a word, he simply snuffled up in an attempt to stop himself before he'd begin to actually cry. Kyungsoo is there... Right there in his arms, after so long. He felt the lump in his throat pushing him further into tears.

But Kyungsoo noticed his expression and began laughing softly. He sat up a little higher within Chanyeol's hold, and cupped his face with his hands. Grinning warmly while wiping the tears away with his thumbs, and then pecking his lips softly.  
"You can cry... It's okay. I cried, too. I cried the most after you sent me that you're coming here." He admitted, a little flush of shyness about his own sentimentality reddened his cheeks. And then he leaned in and kissed Chanyeol yet again.

After another half a day, Chanyeol had to go back home. There will be a single week left for Kyungsoo to work and remain in China until he will finally return as well. The both of them were reenergized by the visit, but even with the most confidence, and most enthusiasm, parting again was hard.

Upon his arrival back home, Chanyeol had already began thinking and planning the day of Kyungsoo's return.

The week had passed, and Chanyeol was already waiting in the airport about half an hour before Kyungsoo's destined landing. He brought everything he needed with him. So there was nothing but anticipation filling his heart with every passing minute.

With the flights update board hanging from the ceiling of the airport's arrival terminal, he knew exactly when Kyungsoo's flight landed, and his heart doubled in speed when the flow of people started exiting the passage. Along with him were maybe ten more people waiting for their own important people to arrive.

One sound, however, overpowered all the rest. The sound of a suitcase's wheels being rolled in a speed much higher than they probably should go.

In between the bobbing heads of the passangers entering the welcoming area, just like the sound, one stood out from the rest. Chanyeol's heart sparked up when his eyes caught the sight of his very own lover rushing towards him.

Eyes bright, a smile smeared on his lips, and his entire body's nearly flying in his direction like being pulled to a magnet.

Chanyeol grinned with pure happiness and spreaded his hands sideways, allowing Kyungsoo to leap right in between the arms that wrapped around him immediately. The two of them nearly fell back on the ground from the impact.

Kyungsoo's arms wrapped around his waist tightly, face burried in his chest, while Chanyeol leaned down just enough to successfully bury his own face against his lover's neck. Sniffing and planting soft pecks against his skin.

They stood there for longer than a whole minute, just hugging each other and basking in the familiar warmth, happiness, and relief. Just existing together. Swallowed by the constantly flowing movement of the relatively small crowd around them.

"I'm back." Kyungsoo hummed.  
"You're back." Chanyeol affirmed, stroking Kyungsoo's back of the head before pulling away a little bit in order to kiss his forehead.

The way Kyungsoo smiled up at him, eyes dripping with joy, little trinkets of exhaustion under them, mouth shaped like a heart, and him. Just him. Just Kyungsoo. Chanyeol pressed his own forehead against Kyungsoo's while shutting his eyes.  
"You're back." He repeated once again, then very lovingly slid his hands down and over Kyungsoo's arms to pull away from the hug.

A little embarrassed, he turned around, his back towards Kyungsoo, and picked up his own backpack from the ground. After fiddling his hand inside for a little bit, he pulled his present out, held it between both his hands, and turned back around to face his boyfriend.

He huffed out, slightly nervous. But then made eye contact with Kyungsoo. With a smile, he held out a bouquet in his hands. A cream colored wrapping paper decorated the arrangement of yellow, red, and white flowers. It was simple, not too thick, and not too big bouquet to resemble the happiness, the purity, and the love that Chanyeol felt towards the occasion. It was very cheesy, he knew, but it didn't matter.

Kyungsoo's eyes widened as he stared at the bouquet being handed to him, and rather than embarrassed, Chanyeol sensed a very strong feeling of gratitude, and yes, even more happiness, coming from him. Especially with the way his eyes examined the bouquet so thoroughly.

Moments later, he shut his eyes and pulled the bouquet to his face, breathing in the fresh fragrance of the flowers. Chanyeol's heart bounced at the sight. Kyungsoo looked so pure, so angel-like while sniffind the flowers like that. He looked divine.

"Thank you, Chanyeolie. I love it." Kyungsoo then stated softly, smiling widely, eyes still locked on the bright flowers, that still didn't shine as beautifully as Kyungsoo's own face.

All through the drive back home, Kyungsoo kept the flowers in his arms, hugging the bouque to his body gently and continouesly admiring its beauty. Which was easy for Chanyeol, because he could admire Kyungsoo's beauty in the meantime. Every time he could afford taking his eyes off the road.

Chanyeol laughed warmly when seeing the way Kyungsoo's face lit up when they finally entered home. On one hand, he knew this was Kyungsoo's house as much as it was his own, but on the other hand it felt like he had just brought a new little puppy with him instead.

He watched, giggling to himself and preparing coffee for them both, how Kyungsoo walked around the place and greeted various items as if they were living house members themselves.  
'Hello, coffee table. Hello, television screen. How are you doing, sofa?'  
Clearly, the mood was high. And the apartment seems to have regained it's color once again. An empty house for so long, to Chanyeol, started fading into black and white after a while.

But now, with Kyungsoo's voice, his feet tapping on the floor, his scent, his presence... Everything came back to life. And the bright and colorful bouquet at the center of the coffee table in the middle of the entire house was just a reminder. Just the perfect resemblance of Chanyeol's own heart and soul.

While Kyungsoo washed himself in the shower, Chanyeol made them a simple healthy soup based dinner. They sat and talked above their plates for nearly two hours. Kyungsoo sharing more stories, and Chanyeol gladly listening to every word in delight, sharing his own few events calmly as well.

Later, when preparing to sleep, Kyungsoo practically threw himself on their giant bed, nuzzling and breathing in the scent of the sheets. Or, dare he suggest, the scent of... Chanyeol himself?

As heavenly as it felt to fall asleep with Kyungsoo in his hotel bed in China, falling asleep snuggled in their own bed felt a hundred times more superb.

Chanyeol was convinced he will become the big spoon for the night, as he began planting kisses on the back of Kyungsoo's neck all across, hiding his beautiful moles with his lips. But after a little while of receiving soft giggles in return, Kyungsoo turned over, and wrapped his body around Chanyeol's head. Placing his own sweet kisses wherever his lips could reach on his face and hair.

They were home.

 

 

The next morning, Chanyeol awakens to a strange sensation in his abdomen, and weight pressing down in a rhythm against the center of his body. It felt... Good. Really good.

So good, in fact, that Chanyeol opened his eyes already in the state of surprise, which only made his shock greater when he found source of the pleasure.

Shoulder blades, the gradient black of Kyungsoo's hair going down towards his neck, the moles spreaded all over his back like a celestial pattern of kisses given to him by the stars, the shine of his smooth skin, the inwards curve of his petite waist running down to his hips and turning into a round, plump, delicious looking piece of ass.

What a damn view.

Kyungsoo's barely clothed said ass of perfection was slowly, yet passionately grinding back and forth over Chanyeol's fully erect dick's length, against his own crotch and belly. There was quite a length to cover, after all.

Chanyeol gulped thickly, his body jerked lightly, giving away the fact that he was finally awake to his lover. Kyungsoo turned his head half way to glance at Chanyeol's face, and oh god, Chanyeol was both glad, and scared.

His eyes were glazed with a layer of lust, his cheeks flushing in the perfect pink that crawled over to the top of his shoulders and ears, and the way his lips were slightly parted just to exhale hotly... It was all too dangerous.  
Reality? Or another wet dream? Chanyeol could barely tell.

"G-Good morning, baby..." He mumbled, feeling his own cheeks flush, arousal and heat beaming out of his whole body.  
"M-Mmh..." Kyungsoo turned back to face away from him, and unfortunately got off of Chanyeol's crotch lazily to sit down on the bed beside him.  
"Hurry up and brush your teeth, I want to kiss you." He then said, one hand holding over his own buldging underwear as he looked at Chanyeol with a pout.

Chanyeol basically forgot to react to Kyungsoo's demand while being so stunned from the whole situation. But he quickly got up from the bed, entirely naked, and rushed to the bathroom, erection standing strong and preventing him from stepping too close to the sink. He felt like he was in a dream. And hoped deeply that he wouldn't wake up before getting back to Kyungsoo.

While brushing his teeth hurriedly in front of the sink and the large mirror attached to the wall above it, he wasn't really paying attention to his own reflection. So when Kyungsoo's warmth suddenly wrapped around his body from behind he was very surprised.

Two hands slid over his waist and held around him in a tight hug. It's cute, and funny at the same time, how Chanyeol couldn't see anything else of Kyungsoo behind him in the reflection. Compared to Chanyeol's body, Kyungsoo was undeniably, and perfectly, smaller. Chanyeol smiled at himself in the mirror, and used his free hand to gently tap onto Kyungsoo's arm.

Soft lips repeatedly, slowly, and affectionately kept pressing against his back. He felt so important, and so, so loved.

Kyungsoo's hands then started sliding down from stroking his abs, to trailing fingers over his hip bones, then lower, and lower. All while Chanyeol's eyes followed them curiously.

Then, both hands grabbed onto his hardened dick tightly and squeezed, enough to send a strong bolt of pleasure lightning through every skin sensor of Chanyeol's nervous system.

The gasp that came naturally from the surprise caused him to choke on the toothpaste foam that filled his mouth. He had to lean down to the sink and cough a few times to regain his ability to breathe and clear his mouth altogether.

"Sorry, I couldn't wait." Kyungsoo then said quietly against his bare back, planting more kisses that Chanyeol could feel travel through his whole body with warmth. God. He loves Kyungsoo so much. He loves his lips on his skin, he loves his voice, he loves his love.

It took him a little bit longer than expected to finally spit everything out and clear his throat from the toothpaste remains, but between huffing out after the choke, and washing his face, he noticed Kyungsoo's top of the head and eyes peeking at the mirror from behind his back.

Hah. Payback time.

Chanyeol was clear and perfectly fine, now with no toothpaste anywhere other than the scent of his breath, but it's his chance to give Kyungsoo a little bit of his own medicine. Though his relatively small hands kept jerking his length slowly, Chanyeol fought his urge to moan. Instead, he turned his head downwards and allowed his hair to hide his face from Kyungsoo's sight in the mirror.

With both hands on the counter of the sink, he lowered himself and curled his back down, just enough to make it seem like he's suddenly ill. He couldn't see himself or how he looks, only his lover's hands slowly sliding over his erection.

It took a few seconds, but it seems that his plan had worked. While he pretended looking sick, Kyungsoo's hands slowly pulled off from his dick, and he generally took a little step back and released him from the hold as a whole.

"Chanyeolie? Are you alrigh---" Kyungsoo began asking, sounding actually worried as he very gently stroked Chanyeol's upper back in an attempt to comfort him. Success.

Chanyeol snuck a smile under his breath, then turned around quickly, surprising Kyungsoo with a smirk. He then slid both arms around Kyungsoo's waist and caught a tight grip of his body. A small gasp escape his lover's mouth when he fairly easily raised him up above the ground and carefully sat him on the edge of the sink's counter. Kyungsoo must have quickly realized what he was doing, because when Chanyeol pulled his arms back, he realized Kyungsoo's legs were already hugging around his hips.

"So strong... Your body's so good." Kyungsoo said, eyes scanning up and down Chanyeol's entire upper body, and a hand gently stroking over his defined abs.  
"I'm glad you like it." Chanyeol grinned and leaned his head a little closer, pecking his boyfriend's forehead.  
"I love it. I'm really proud of you. You're working so hard, and it shows. Well done, baby." Kyungsoo continued, praising Chanyeol some more, inflating his ego, but also shyness meter, some more, before trailing his fingers upwards and grabbing to Chanyeol's jaw to pull him into a kiss.

"You taste good, too... And you smell good... You look good... Mmh." He hummed between kisses, his words in Chanyeol's ears are sweet like honey. It definitely got his heart pumping. Knowing that Kyungsoo's aware of these things, and admires them enough to praise them gives Chanyeol so much satisfaction and pride. He's good... He's good for Kyungsoo.

"God... I love you." He breathed into the kiss, his palms meanwhile rubbing Kyungsoo's inner thighs with desire, with a craving.  
"These make me so hungry." Chanyeol smiled while licking his boyfriend's lower lip, sliding his fingertips under the rubber lines of Kyungsoo's tight underwear and stroking right where the nerves are sensitive. He felt the way Kyungsoo's breath shook a little against his mouth.

"I'll feed you well if you do a good job." Kyungsoo teased with a small smile. He stroked Chanyeol's jaw lightly before raising his legs and pulling his own underwear off skillfully. Allowing them to drop down beside Chanyeol's feet.  
"That's perfect. I'm an expert after all." Chanyeol leaned back in and sucked on his boyfriend's lips once again, leaving them plump and wet.

"You're so beautiful, goddamn... So glad I can finally hold you again." Chanyeol then said lowly. He felt a little emotional from the fact that finally, there will no longer be any distances separating them from one another anymore. Except for their regular adult duties, they're together.

"Don't go all soft on me now... I'll cry." Kyungsoo pouted lightly, causing them both to chuckle simultaneously while his hands wrapped over Chanyeol's shoulders and pulled him closer.

Chanyeol didn't quite understand just how close he needed to lean in, and Kyungsoo had to pull some more even after he'd stopped. But eventually, it was close enough so that his mouth buried into Kyungsoo's collarbones. His eyes automatically focused on the view of himself in the mirror. He watched, and felt, how Kyungsoo's fingers trail up his scalp, until wet heat suddenly covered his ear and made him shudder sharply.

"O-Oh..." He exhaled unexpectedly, realizing a moment later that the sensation repeated again. And its source was Kyungsoo licking and kissing his ear. The heat of his breaths and the overly clear sound of wetness pierced right into his brain and nearly knocked him into a state of a daze.

But no, he can't let Kyungsoo take the cake just yet.

Chanyeol ran both his hands over Kyungsoo's inner thighs once more. From the knee and over to the very connection with the hip. One hand then took the job of enthusiastically jerking his boyfriend's hardened dick up and down, while the other hand had turned into a gun and started teasing Kyungsoo's entrance.

"Good... My ass started getting cold up here." Kyungsoo whispered into Chanyeol's ear teasingly, then began planting kisses all over the side of his head and huffing out lightly with each time Chanyeol's fingers slid further inside. Chanyeol meanwhile was busy leaving his mark on Kyungsoo's collarbones lovingly. Suckling on the skin and kissing the reddened bruise that remains from the force.

He felt Kyungsoo's hands let go of the hold around his neck for a bit, then heard a few drawers being opened and closed around him, before Kyungsoo's hand slid down into the space between them, and nudged a cold plastic container against the back of the hand that's jerking him off.

That container was revealed to be a lube bottle, Chanyeol discovered after pulling back a little.  
"No pressure, but the quality of our lunch is in your hands." Kyungsoo teased once more when Chanyeol slipped his now lube coated fingers into his hole. Turning and curling them inside to spread it well and stretch him some more.  
"Won't remain with the hands for long." Chanyeol replied sneakily and pecked on Kyungsoo's bare beautiful chest before lubing his own dick with some more of the bottle's contain.

"You're right," Kyungsoo continued their breathy exchange building with anticipation. "But something else is long..." He lowered his eyes down to Chanyeol aligning himself with the entrance, and Chanyeol felt the way he automatically spread his own legs wider, eagerly allowing him into his depths.

Chanyeol shoved it in in one slow yet smooth push, eyes not leaving the view of his whole length getting sucked in by his lover's body. Kyungsoo's soft moan of expectancy was quite motivating. And although artificial, the lubrication was perfect for their amount of neediness towards each other at the moment.

Kyungsoo shuddered lightly once filled, and Chanyeol grabbed onto the back side of his knees to keep his lower body in place. And then they went for it. Chanyeol began thrust himself into Kyungsoo steadily, raising the speed and intensity as it went on.

At some point, however, Kyungsoo caught Chanyeol's ears with something he certainly didn't expect to hear.

"S-So. Ahh, how does it feel to see yourself fucking me?" He teased with a smile in between the light moans, and began stroking both his palms over Chanyeol's chest and abdomen, licking his own lips hungrily while staring at his body. God, Kyungsoo knows so well how to make him feel good about himself. "Is it as good as my view?"

Clearly caught off guard, Chanyeol shifted his focus from his boyfriend onto the reflection displaying in the mirror behind the sink counter he's half lying on.

It was... Strange. To see the way his own face reacted to the different sensations running through his body. To see the sharpness of his aroused eyes, the pink hue covering his cheeks, and the sweaty shine of the worthy effort it takes to tuck himself within his lover.

"Bet it's great. You're always so good Chanyeolie---..." Kyungsoo joined in to the experience with some more loving praises and needy moans.

He stared for some time at the way what is visible of his body is moving with each thrust, and the more he looked, the more embarrassed and shy he started feeling. Not because he's ashamed, or because he didn't like what he saw. But rather, because he liked it way too much. It was such a giant boost of confidence to see just how good of a job he was doing, and how hot of a view he gives Kyungsoo each time.

However, before the shyness took over him, a brilliant idea spawned in his mind, and a small smile grew across his lips instead.

"Wouldn't you want to see it too," Chanyeol asked, exiting Kyungsoo's hole and wrapping around him in a tight warm hug instead. He pulled him down from the counter in order to stand on his own feet, then gently turned him around to face the mirror.  
"How you look like when I fuck you?" Chanyeol finished the actual question in a deep voice, head lowered in order to be located right beside Kyungsoo's. He smiled, looking at their reflection in the mirror, then held onto Kyungsoo's hips and pulled them backwards.

He could see Kyungsoo's eyes growing wider in the reflection when he spread his ass cheeks and slid himself back into him. Which made Kyungsoo grab onto the counter in order to provide an equal push against Chanyeol's thrust, to keep himself from bumping into it.  
"Ah--- Fuck..." He cussed under his breath, biting onto his own lip and making eye contact with Chanyeol in the mirror.

"You're mine now." Chanyeol hummed deeply, leaning down and pressing his body over Kyungsoo's in order to begin feasting on his neck again. Both arms held onto the counter right beside Kyungsoo's own. This time, not forgetting to smile at his boyfriend's reflection victoriously while doing so. He could feel the way Kyungsoo's body shivered with arousal at the sight.

Then, he began thrusting passionately, watching Kyungsoo's face shift and change, flush and squint. Seeing the way Kyungsoo's trying to keep a straight face was hilarious. Chanyeol didn't hold back from toying with him.

One moment he was squeezing his eyes shut, the next he was opening his mouth and letting out a wet moan, then he winced with a gasp, and once more melted into a melodic cry of pleasure.

"So, how does it feel," Chanyeol began, noticing Kyungsoo trying extra hard to keep his expression fairly neutral. So he pulled his hips back and slammed himself into him strongly, breaking his facade and making him whine out desperately. "To see yourself getting fucked by me?" He asked, feeling so powerful, and so confident, as Kyungsoo's body was trembling with excitement from every move he makes.

There was a hint of hesitation on Kyungsoo's face in the mirror, as if he's trying to hold something back. He shut his lips tightly and began huffing from his nose. Oh... Is this some sort of pride game? Is he trying to tease Chanyeol some more? Well, challenge accepted.

Chanyeol removed one of his arms from the counter, and slid it over Kyungsoo's stomach, lower and lower until he reached his crotch. He smiled darkly at Kyungsoo in the mirror, before grabbing onto his dick tightly, and squeezing with his thumb covering the tip, while thrusting as deep as possible into him at the same time.

He could practically see Kyungsoo's eyes roll back in their sockets when not only his expression, but his body unravelled an invisible layer of suppressment. His mouth opened, and along with it came a moan that echoed like a siren's song inside the bathroom.

"Feels good--- Feels so good, Chanyeolie---" Kyungsoo's voice was dripping with lust and a strong craving for more. "Oh my god... Haa, fuck me... Fuck me---" He whined, tightening his grip on the counter and pushing his ass further back onto Chanyeol, swallowing him in eagerly.  
"You're so sexy, baby." Chanyeol hummed breathlessly against his ear.

The two of them continued on, no more holding back, hey were mesmerized by watching themselves fucking in the bathroom's mirror.

Slowly but surely, Chanyeol kept building closer and closer to his limit. His hand on Kyungsoo's dick started working with more effort, just like his own hips, in order for them both to enjoy this to the fullest, and in sync.

But while being so focused on providing the most pleasure possible for the both of them, Kyungsoo took advantage of the situation, and smiled at the two of them in the mirror. Chanyeol's mouth kept harboring soft kisses over his back meanwhile. Trailing the cosmic pattern of moles.

"You're so good, so big, so hard--- Baby, you always treat me so good," Kyungsoo began talking through the moans. "You're so cute... My puppy boy." He grabbed Chanyeol's free hand in his own and pulled it closer, placing gentle wet kisses over it.

Kyungsoo just consumes him. Everything about him, about his voice, his body, his mind, his words... The way he expresses his feelings, the way he loves Chanyeol with his entire existence, and how strongly Chanyeol can feel it, whether they're in the middle of knocking over the bathroom's counter or while they are each at their own work just thinking about each other.

He makes Chanyeol feel alive.

"You're such a good boy, baby--- I love you... Give it to me, all of it---" Kyungsoo spoke again, his voice laced with wet arousal, the peak of his pleasure's edge. His eyes were shining and his mouth opened, pink, and hot. His whole body was begging to finally reach the climax, and Chanyeol was more than willing to deliver.

"Come, come Chanyeolie---... Fill me..." He moaned lustfully, sliding Chanyeol's finger into his mouth to suckle on, while releasing the counter with his other hand and pressing onto Chanyeol's hand to go full force with the jerking of his dick.

Chanyeol's body went into jitters, he looked straight into Kyungsoo's eyes through the mirror's reflection, then shut his own and hammered deep into him, pressing his body against the counter. With a loud grainy moan he felt the tips of his nerves burning, and started releasing everything that's been building of his arousal for the past three days deep inside of Kyungsoo's welcoming warmth.

When he opened his eyes again, heavy breathing and still at the high of his own orgasm, he found Kyungsoo's head fallen on top of the counter, moaning earnestly while releasing his own load into Chanyeol's hand that's been jerking him, and dripping on the tiled floor. His expression was a mixture of shock and the greatest of joys, and it was so damn hot.

Did he reach his climax just because he felt that Chanyeol was ejaculating inside of him? It seemed to be the case. And if that's the case then Chanyeol really doesn't want any of this to end at all. Even if he feels quite light headed.

Chanyeol thrusted into Kyungsoo several more times, hearing the sticky wet sounds of his dick pushing his cum deeper into his boyfriend's ass and filling him up. Kyungsoo's whiny huffs were like music to his ears.

"Fuck, baby... Did it feel good?" He asked airily, leaning down over Kyungsoo's bent body and kissing his skin affectionately, breathing him in, and wrapping around his body in a loving squeeze.

"God... It felt too good---... I didn't even mean to finish," Kyungsoo huffed, raising a hand up and behind his own head just to pet Chanyeol's hair. "But when you creamed I just---... It felt so hot... And naughty..." He admitted between heavy breaths.

"You love it naughty." Chanyeol chuckled lightly, then raised his upper body back up and pulled himself out of Kyungsoo. Allowing the load released to slowly drip out. But before he could admire the very 'naughty' view of his boy's ass, Kyungsoo turned himself around to face Chanyeol.  
"You're naughty." He said with a small satisfied yet exhausted smile.

"Good, because I love you too." He grinned teasingly, then gladly leaned in between Kyungsoo's arms and landed a warm and loving kiss on his lips.

Kyungsoo had other plans though, as he hugged tightly around Chanyeol's head and began stroking fingers through his messy locks of hair from the bed. He parted the kiss on Chanyeol's lips, and instead began planting enamored smooches all over his face.

Chanyeol was a little surprised from the extremely affectionate gesture. He felt his cheeks flush up as he shut his eyes and started giggling from the ticklish feeling of Kyungsoo nuzzling all close and intimate against him. Kyungsoo is everything. Kyungsoo is the cutest most precious human being on this earth, the sharpest, most intense human, too.

It's really crazy, how easily Kyungsoo can make him feel like the king on top of the whole world. Like a ferocious beast hunting for prey, like the master of the house and the hero that'll save the day. And on the other hand, he can make him feel like the young lanky boy in highschool again. The boy that lacked confidence and faith in himself, but found comfort, love, and a reason to grow thanks to Kyungsoo. Thanks to his genuine kindness, his careful actions, his warm words of wisdom, and the ability to simply contain all that Chanyeol thought he will never achieve, and help him create the foundation of morality on which he stands strongly today.

The beauty between how they take care of each other, and get taken care of by one another, is the harmony that keeps them together. How different they are, how similar they are. Their various hobbies, their combined interests, all of this together creates the perfect balance.

"I love you." Kyungsoo then says, planting a thick and sentimental kiss right at the center of Chanyeol's forehead. It was so nice... So warm... Chanyeol truly felt loved. He felt the way Kyungsoo's heart was beating while being wrapped around him this tightly.

Suddenly, a sound breaks the intimate silence the two have been stuck in. A sound floating in from outside of the bathroom.

The two of them froze in their positions like statues, eyes wide and curious with surprise, until Kyungsoo jerked out of the shock. Chanyeol immediately released him from the tight hold, and watched him slide away. It was Kyungsoo's phone ringing. A sound Chanyeol hasn't heard in a long time. It felt... Domestic, again. Kyungsoo's really back.

As Kyungsoo headed over towards the phone located on the cabinet beside the bed, Chanyeol's eyes locked on a new point of interest. Kyungsoo's ass cheeks were slightly pink, definitiely shiny, and very round and plump. His skin must still be slightly sensitive to the amount of times Chanyeol drilled himself against it.

But further observation revealed an even more interesting view. Chanyeol saw Kyungsoo's body shudder lightly right before he answered, and then, he saw the way his own cum starts to drip down from Kyungsoo's hole. The thick and sticky white streams of sperm began sliding down on the inside of Kyungsoo's thighs, and gave them a new unimaginable sexy shine.

He had to bite down onto his own lip tight enough to cause pain so he'd be able to avoid getting another boner right after he'd just created that sticky thigh mess himself. That display of Kyungsoo's naked body from behind, glistening with the sunshine sneaking from behind their bedroom's curtains, sparkling with dewy sweat, standing with his hip sideways and accentuating his beautiful curves...

Fuck, Kyungsoo's seriously too sexy.

When Chanyeol noticed his boy turning to glance back at him, he immediately turned his eyes away and covered his mouth and nose with his palm. His cheeks were burning. Is it too much? Is he hornying too hard over his own boyfriend?

After a short while of some more talking into the phone, Kyungsoo hung up and placed it back on the shelf, then turned to Chanyeol with a small smile.

"Seems like we finished right on time... Jongin's asking us out for lunch. Junmyeon and Sehun will be joining too." He hummed with obvious noticable yet subtle joy. Chanyeol was still pretty much stuck in his own thoughts about some more sex.

"World to Chanyeol~" He was aware that Kyungsoo was calling for his approval, but only when he stood right in front of him and stroked the side of his cheek gently, was he able to finally snap back to reality. He wasn't wearing his glasses anymore, must have placed them down beside his phone.

"O-Oh, yeah, lunch with the boys." He nodded quickly, holding Kyungsoo's reached out hand in place, just so he could turn his head and kiss his palm. A smile spawned across his lips right after, when Kyungsoo chuckled lightly.

"I missed them so much. They'll like me even if my ass is going to be sore as fuck. Right?" He continued, passing by Chanyeol, yet keeping his hand held while heading towards the shower. Oh, Chanyeol loves showering with Kyungsoo. Especially after sex. Because then he can properly spoil him and take care of him as means to repay for the collective ass damage. Literally.

"Sehun almost cried when I told him the leftovers you cooked were gone." Chanyeol teased defenseless absent Sehun while sliding the shower's door shut, and seeing Kyungsoo's cheeks raise into an amused smile from behind.

He felt content, warm, and truly happy, to see the way Kyungsoo was welcomed by the bunch. Jongin shed a single tear of happines while wrapping around Kyungsoo tightly. Junmyeon held him in a hug and patted his back for a long time, whispering something that made him smile happily. And Sehun clinged to him like a child who found their parent after getting lost in a large crowded space. Which made Kyungsoo equally as happy.

Karma seems to have liked Sehun a lot, too, because when they sat down to chat over their ordered lunch dishes, Sehun was not even the slightest afraid of exposing every single one of Chanyeol's desperate and embarrassing actions derived from the loneliness he experienced during Kyungsoo's faraway journey.

It was a terribly humiliating exposure, but from the way Kyungsoo's eyes shined with every confession, and the way he gripped to Chanyeol's hand tighter and tighter under the table, he knew that as sad as it sounded, Kyungsoo probably needed to hear it. Chanyeol almost wanted to pat his own back for getting through all of that.

But at the end of the meeting, he was the one weeping into his eleventh tissue from hearing Kyungsoo's confessions about the things he had gone through, and embarrassments he embarked in due to his own, far worse, completely isolated loneliness.

 

 

Chanyeol's knees definitely have gone numb, after spending so much time separating the colorful laundry from the white, and black piles.

He filled the washing machine with anything that had even a little bit of color, then groaned with distaste at the ache his knees will have to endure for the next few minutes while pouring the perfect amount of detergent and turning the washing cycle on. The basket containing the other colors will remain beside the machine for the next round.

It has been a month from the day Kyungsoo returned home. And there bubbled a bitter sweet sensation in Chanyeol's stomach when he realized Kyungsoo had only received a single week of a break after the two months long project that sucked the soul out of his exhausted body.

He was upset that Kyungsoo was so hurriedly called back to work. But he was also extremely glad that his boyfriend's recovery from the nearly, if not fully, traumatic events, was quick. And that he was able to return to the normal routine without much of a struggle.

So far, there haven't been any news regarding Kyungsoo's position at work. But with every day passing, Chanyeol felt how the anticipation for a change was increasing deep down in his lover's heart.

Today, he decided to make a heavier meal for dinner. Against december's cold weather it's always better to arm one's self with enough layers. Be it clothes, or fat. Both would work. Both are things that Kyungsoo could use.

Chanyeol immediately got down to skillfully chopping every ingredient into the heated pot, and within a quick spicing and saucing process, he was done with the making, and only had to continue watching the stew simmer their meal just in case it'll leak.

For the wait, Chanyeol occupied himself with his phone. An updated wallpaper picture welcomed him to the menu's main page. A picture of himself, wearing a party hat, and playfully hugging Kyungsoo from behind, pretending to be holding him up, since he's wearing a fake lion's mane head piece. Yixing is there too, standing behind the both of them and looking cluelessly amused. A silly yet hilarious reenactment of the Lion King's famous opening scene. Kyungsoo does pose while pouting, but Chanyeol still loves the picture because although looking unhappy, Kyungsoo's hand is actually holding Chanyeol's tight and firm.

His birthday was simple, cosy, and fun. Kyungsoo had gone out with Jongin to buy his favourite cake, and along with a few alcoholic drinks, it turned out to be a pleasant and wonderful time for their group of friends. He was so happy when Baekhyun arrived and pulled Yixing inside their apartment behind him.

Their next planned event will be Christmas. But that's way bigger of a headache to plan. So as the majority of years so far, Kyungsoo and him will most likely procrastinate until the last minute, attempt to attend an event, ditch in the middle, and spend the night finishing a whole cake in front of a seasonal movie marathon that replays every single year on TV.

Just thinking about the joy of hiding away from the world on their own and having the best time of their lives without worries already makes Chanyeol's heart flutter with anticipation.

Before he realized, the pot on the stove beside him began shrieking, and he gladly lowered the heat and stirred around. Kyungsoo would definitely love this. Winter comfort foods contain most of his favourites from home. Chanyeol just hoped he did it justice.

As he was focusing on the art of cooking, the apartment's door unlocked, opened, closed, and moments later, quick happy tapping of slippery socked feet could be heard echoing on the floor, approaching the kitchen.

Kyungsoo hurried so much to the kitchen's entrance that he nearly slid a little too far and fell. Both he, and Chanyeol gasped, but he managed to grab onto the door frame and stabilize himself before reaching an irreversible imblanace.

After a second of staring at one another surprised, they both burst into laughter, and Kyungsoo happily stepped towards Chanyeol, wrapping both his arms around his larger waist, and getting wrapped just as tightly around his whole body, plus a kiss on the head.

"Baby, I'm so happy." He said in a tone filled with excitement. To Chanyeol, it looked like he was glowing. The shine of his eyes was truly a greate sight. The atmosphere had become so energetic from Kyungsoo's hype, that Chanyeol's own body began tingling with curiousity.  
"I have amazing news." Kyungsoo cleared his throat, placed both palms on Chanyeol's chest, and smiled up at him widely.

"I've been promoted!" His lips formed the shape of a heart, and his eyes fell nearly shut, into two sparkling crescents of happiness. Chanyeol's heart was bouncing with bliss.

"Oh my god!!! Kyungsoo!!!" Chanyeol could barely contain his excitement, the volume of his voice also increased, as he let out a wild 'Woooohooo!' and squeezed his lover's body against his own tighter than ever. Raising his feet above the ground and swinging him from side to side as they both laughed from the incredible announcement.

"I'm so, so proud of you, baby. Holy shit---" Chanyeol let Kyungsoo's feet back on the ground and pulled his face away a little, so they could look each other in the eyes.  
"You're amazing. You deserve it. You deserve the world. And I love you." He said, leaning in and pressing one long, warm and affectionate kiss on Kyungsoo's forehead.

His beloved, adorable, and spectacular boyfriend giggled with unrestrained excited shyness, but then began trailing a single finger over Chanyeol's chest in a circle. His lips puckered out just a little bit, and his eyes turned down towards his own moving finger.

"There's only one thing...." He began, voice low. "I will have to go... For half a year this time."

Chanyeol's jaw dropped as silence filled the air. His heart, mood, and mind, spun into a hurricane of painful memories resurfacing from the dirt he had buried them in.

No... No. There's no way.

"I'm just joking," Kyungsoo grinned up at him with an unexpectedly light hearted laughter. Then he cupped Chanyeol's face in his hands and pulled his head down into a gentle kiss.  
"I'm staying right here with you."

"That was so cruel---..." Is all Chanyeol's shaky voice could exclaim in a miserable tone, before he grabbed to his lover's body and absorbed him into another tight hug.

"I love you, my baby boy." Kyungsoo talked to him in the same tone one would speak to a baby, and laughed in amusement after receiving his punishment, a wide slap to the ass, finished with a tight and firm grip of Chanyeol's whole palm.

"And I love you, my rich, successful, handsome, best ass owning future husband." Chanyeol grinned, making eye contact with Kyungsoo, who seemed quite surprised from the last description used for him.  
"What? You really do have the best ass." He defended his statement teasingly.

"F-Future husband...?" Kyungsoo's eyes were shaking slightly, his hold onto Chanyeol's body was still tight, and loving.  
Chanyeol's heart sped up a little when he realized what he had just exposed with that deep, commital term of endearment.  
"Yes. No...? I mean, I want to marry you," Chanyeol's words were as scrambled as his thoughts. But way gentler than his drumming heart. "Will you marry me? At some point? In the future? When I... Actually have a ring and... All that..."

Did he... Really just ask Kyungsoo to marry him? Like that? Out of the blue? He didn't even prepare a ring, or a speech, or his heart for confronting such a deep and meaningful decision. He couldn't think of anything at all, other than the way he was sinking into subtle panic, Kyungsoo's arms were the only thing stopping him from falling.

Kyungsoo was silent for a while, staring into Chanyeol's eyes. He couldn't read what kind of expression, reaction, or feeling Kyungsoo's projecting at all. But maybe that's just because he was too deep in his own anxiety.

"I want to marry you, Chanyeol. Let's get married soon." His voice was honest, deep, and serious. So warm, and sincere... And now, after hearing his proper answer, Chanyeol could also notice the way that his eyes were glistening with a thick and strong layer of sparkles over his eyes.

"When I return from the six month work oversea---" Kyungsoo began, but Chanyeol caught up to his tease, immediately breaking out of the unexpected serious atmosphere that fell upon him.  
"You're awful." Chanyeol nudged his forehead against Kyungsoo's in protest of the joking mood he had brought them both into, and laughed, enjoying the way Kyungsoo's chuckle rolled happily in his ears, with his eyes closed.

Chanyeol got to happily update Kyungsoo about finally, being invited to Junmyeon and Sehun's housewarming party as they sat and ate. After receiving and shower of compliments about the quality of the food he had made for them both.

 

 

"I claim the left side of the bathroom." Kyungsoo hummed later, as they were both lying in bed, snuggled up together.  
"What do you mean, claim? You can't just claim things as yours... How do you even claim half a bathroom?"  
"I don't know. But it's mine now."  
"Wait, the toilet's on the left side, am I supposed to shit on the floor?" Chanyeol pouted in disbelief.  
"Gross!" Kyungsoo smacked his chest in disapproval.  
"What the--- You're the one claiming toilets!" Chanyeol insisted, trying to prove his innocence.

"Okay, then I claim the left side of you."  
"Left side of m--- Me? How does that work?"  
"Mmmh... Maybe like this?" Kyungsoo nuzzled tighter, closer, and warmer against Chanyeol's left half of the body.  
"Ohh... Maybe I can offer you my right side for half the price?"  
"Alright, what's the price then?" Kyungsoo asked with a raised eyebrow.

"You." Chanyeol's voice was deep.  
"You mean I'm only a cheap half sale deal?" Kyungsoo's judgemental expression sharpened.  
"N-No! It was supposed to sound romantic, okay? It played better in my head." Chanyeol nervously attempted to defend himself.

"Fine. You can claim me." Kyungsoo said decidedly.  
Chanyeol remained silent for a moment. His mind gearing up images far more heated than the relaxed mood they were in.

"Oh... That sounded way more suggestive than I imagined."  
"What... Claim me?" Kyungsoo's expression shifted from the judgement to calmness, then from calmness to curiousity.  
"Y-Yeah."  
"Did it now...? Hmm." He seemed intrigued by the slow change that's going with Chanyeol's body temperature, with his energy. "Claim me... Take me... Own me..." He hummed, relaxing his eyes into a gentle yet fierce stare up into his eyes.  
"Y-You're so---..."  
"So what~?" Kyungsoo's smile grew, this time, with the addition of his hand slowly rubbing over Chanyeol's stomach, then sliding underneath his shirt and trailing fingers over his toned muscles and skin.

"May I make love to you?" Chanyeol blurted, feeling the tingles of Kyungsoo's touches run down straight to his fabric pushing growing boner.  
"Pffft."  
"I'll make the deal worthy."  
"Mmmh..." Kyungsoo allowed his voice out warmly, then shifted and moved, until he was lying on top of Chanyeol's body, allowing their crotches the grind together. "You better."

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That was a ride, wasn't it?  
> I wanted to display a genuine, healthy, progressive, accepting and beautiful relationship that can withstand any obstacle in its way. Because I feel like there's a lack of the well worthy effort that goes into being in love, and maintaining a life with another person in consideration. Also because they're seksi.
> 
> Come find me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/ksoominie) if you'd like! ♡
> 
> I hope it was enjoyable, thank you so much for reading.  
> Please let me know what you think, I really do want to know! ♡


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